A Masochistic Dominant

He is the very model of a masochistic dominant -
He has no information: just an awful, torrid, bestial grunt;
His brain cell count is low; his frontal lobe is prominent,
Despite his cries hysterical, he truly is a real cunt;

He's very well acquainted, too, with matters monumental here;
He has a tiny penis and, by hiding it, ensures he's clear
To be so very boastful of its size and his duration, so
He's comical, excitable and comes before he's going to;

(chorus)
He's comical, excitable and comes before he's going to;
He's comical, excitable and comes before he's going to;
He's comical, excitable and comes before he's going to;

He's a naughty dominant who has such very little nouse,
He ought be the one who's whipped (perhaps by his darling spouse);
In short, in matters dominate, he isn't fit to masturbate
Himself, the filthy reprobate, so let him simply masticate;

(chorus)
In short, in matters dominate, he isn't fit to masturbate
Himself, the filthy reprobate, so let him simply masticate;

He knows Gorean fanstasy, has tasted all the mystery
Of blud wine on the internet; and rolled a dice, the silly get;
He can quote the greats and claim: "I wrote those"; he has no shame;
And when the world really finds out, he tells them it was all a game;

He can instruct her on her knees to give his hairy balls a squeeze;
His croaking chorus will soon seize, as she learns how hard to tease;
He counts each inch more than a yard and bullies her - the clever card,
The ignorant foul mouthed blaggard, who can barely keep it hard;

(chorus)
The ignorant foul mouthed blaggard, who can barely keep it hard;
The ignorant foul mouthed blaggard, who can barely keep it hard;
The ignorant foul mouthed blaggard, who can barely keep it hard;

So let him wash his pretty prick; and let him find out if he's picked
A slave, who he has really tricked, with all his tourettes to inflict;
Let each slave soon crush his balls, diminishing the silly cunt,
Discovering the model of a masochistic dominant;

(chorus)
Let each slave soon crush his balls, diminishing the silly cunt,
Discovering the model of a masochistic dominant;

In fact, he knows four letter words and utters them: he is absurd;
She'll realise he is not fit to lick or even touch her clit;
And, yes, he is a coward; a viscious, little scaredy-cat,
He rarely knows the meaning of: "where in fuck's name are you at?"

He's learnt to be a copy cat, like a novice in a nunnery;
His attitude is bluster and full of utter flummery;
He hopes to collar her - it's his elemental strategy;
But if you prod his poker, you will find that it is flaccid: see!

(chorus)
But if you prod his poker, you will find that it is flaccid: see!
But if you prod his poker, you will find that it is flaccid: see!
But if you prod his poker, you will find that it is flaccid: see!

For all his lack of knowledge, he'll mind fuck with the best of them;
So ensure you're wary and do not be distressed again -
You slaves who, soon, will crush his balls; diminish now the silly cunt:
Discover he's the model of a masochistic dominant;

(chorus)
You slaves who, soon, will crush his balls; diminish now the silly cunt:
Discover he's the model of a masochistic dominant.

(W.S.Gilbert and A.Sullivan spin slowly in their graves.)