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Click hereHow easily you make me hard.
That black lace thing you brought back
From Hollywood, the time you
And Marcy went to the convention,
That one's obvious, but there's the way
Your voice goes low and raspy when
You sayI want you to... orCome here and...
It doesn't even matter what words
You choose—it's that Barbara Stanwyck tone
That flips me on like a neon sign
At sunset in the window of a biker bar
Out by the oil fields. Those sleepy, slitted
Eyes you get work like kerosene
Thrown onto a campfire. Your touch,
A gentle, feathered finger on my wrist,
The back of your hand gliding down
My cheek, oh and of course when you reach
Around and heft my soft weight. That,
Indeed, works too. All of these things work
Because they tell me you want me (me!)
To enter into your perfect beauty.
Forgive the violence of my need.
I like the smart use of proper nouns. They give a personal touch in a very subtle way. Some may not recognize "Barbara Stanwyck," but that just adds flavor IMO because you don't really need to know. Very clever.
For some reason Lit is still not letting me comment as greenmountaineer.
....to read a new poet writing real erotica, none of the all-to-often used porn words. The slow burn is done well with just the right ammount of scene setting. Good to meet you OpenField, I look forward to more of your pieces.
and the eroticism builds gently but surely as the poem progresses. I think "get" is a typo, yes? Those last two lines, especially, are just wonderful. I really enjoyed reading this. Thank you for sharing it.
By the lady & Marcy : you have also enumerated a number of stuff / erotic triggers also .Whether this is how she gets him hard & controls his desire depends from Couple to Couple ! Nice poem , good erotica :5-ed.