Deep Inside

Hate me all you want,

As tears cascade down my cheeks
I realize I'm not as strong as I use to be
I'm not as hard
Now I'm just a broken shell, slowly emptying
The walls and mountains surround an empty fort
The masks and front protect an entity no longer there
Questions asked given numb responses,
Eyes glazed blank look out rainy windows
Feeling, seeing, surrounded by, a sea of grey and black.
My heart slows, nearly to a stop, it's not like its needed anyway
All it does is break and shatter, or ache with memories
You have given up on me, so have I
The eyes of darkest brown turn dull,
The words no longer flow from mouth or hands
All has stopped, all is gone, nothing has arrived
Slowly falling, slowly swirling, surrounded by the masses
In the mind, sanity breaks, becoming what its not.
Hate of self quickly fills, what used to be the heart,
Hate of self quickly surrounds what used to be the mind
Now what's left is only what has grown from deep inside.