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dewy lawn
fresh
each blade of grass glistening
each nerve along your legs
under my kisses
sparkling
breeze
warm and rich
my breath
grazing
inner thighs
swell of clouds
heavenly rumble
music of moans
scent of creation
heaving hips
rolling so close
tasting the chase
of impending thunder,
your downpour
lightning clasp
illuminating us both
softly
together
forever bound
we glow.
- COMMENTS
todski28almost 10 years agoWell thought out conceptually, great use of metaphor, sensuality, could probably find a different word to glistening to freshen it up a little, you interlinked the theme very well, smooth read. Your use of sound is strong as always,
Suggest switch
Tasting the chase
To
Taste the chase
Works better sonically and strengthens the word taste.
Maybe change clasp to gasp similar sound but a bit more illuminating than clasp.
Thank you for another string read
Anonymousover 10 years agoJust perfect. So beautiful, sensual and captivatingly lovely. You evoke so much in so few words. Very well done.
Anonymousabout 11 years agoA little late in writing but the praise is everlasting. Beautiful, sensual, moving and deep. You master words and play with them. Thank you. Xxxxxx
Ashesh9about 11 years agoThank you for apt parallels , Ms. SpringBreeze !!
