Good-Bye

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GOOD-BYE

Hello became goodbye.

And the lovers said goodbye in the darkness,
but they were not the only ones.
Goodbye say all things that can say hello,
and in silence and forgetfulness we end our days.
All the universe, from one end to the other,
is like a fleeting light which tries not to fade
and there is nothing at the end of Time.

Goodbye says the Sun to its little Moon,
who tried desperately to catch its light,
Goodbye says the Sun to its own Light,
for it knows that even stars can fade.

Goodbye said the Gods to their divinity,
as their Twilight consumed them all in flames
For God is but his own Creation
that creates and destroys
but eventually meets with its end, and why not ? For all things go, all things die,
all things pass.

Down here we all say goodbye.

He has told me goodbye.

I die each time I remember
the day he said goodbye.
And through the years
which shall see my hair turn white,
I will never forget
and the pain will only crawl
into yet another part buried inside
the vastness of myself.

He shall find another, he shall love again, and what will become of me ?
I am to turn to but a little spec, a little wisp, that his memory will carry until he can no longer remember or no longer care.

I have said goodbye. It was the death I knew was coming. And it was just as well.
I buried myself, I built my own shiny coffin
and made my grave. And where I go
he cannot follow, no one can follow, for I go where there is nothing and where all the anguish,
pain and sadness dies because it, too,
is taken by the Nothing.

Goodbye I say to the world,
to which I shall never return.
Goodbye to your comforts,to your fleeting joys, to your preciousness. Goodbye.
No longer to awaken with a smile,
to feel the sun on my skin,
to feel my heart singing
No longer to feel any pleasure in anything,
no longer to be able to love.

Goodbye, my Love, Goodbye.

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3 Comments
bluebellbluebellalmost 16 years ago
Indeed

The beginning of this poem reads very musically, and I quite liked it once I began to understand the swing. If you'll not hurt me for saying so, the first half read as almost an adult (and therefore more deep and ponderous) version of Goodnight Moon. I appreciate your effort very much, though I do agree that it could benefit from a bit of editing. Thank you for sharing!

LeBrozLeBrozalmost 16 years ago
██

I see what Ange means in the previous comment. First, this is a much better 'goodbye' offering than most such fare I've seen here. But it could use some very careful editing of some 'filler' words — and, the, to. Too many words dampen the effects within this fine poem.

AngelineAngelinealmost 16 years ago
I like this poem a lot

and think it's really strong, really well written. However I do think you could make it shine by shaping it some and editing out some of the extra words that aren't adding anything to the poem. Just my opinion, of course, and overall it's very good.

Your poem has been recommended in the New Poems Reviews thread on Literotica's Poetry Feedback and Discussion forum. Thanks for the read!