I frighten easy

Carefully, carefully, I creep towards you.
Frightened of the potential that
Solves mysteries and makes your touch
comforting rather than titillating.
For hands to convey warmth rather than
the thrill of cruelty under which I suffer
exquisitely.

Even rainbows arc.
Potential energy is vast while the kinetic ebbs.
Latent and liminal, Galatea.
With you, I can remain still a child.
Yet I do not want to be cajoled.

I want to thrust into you, hoping
That this is where I will want to rest.

What do I ask that I am unafraid to receive?
A nonsensical dare that asks for more than
Can be stomached, though I am starving.

Abstinence is fear of addiction.
That newness is corruption.
The fear of enslavement, of being controlled.
Of not wanting to be without
Once I have let myself lean.

I fear that you will consume me.
That you will inspire me to self-inflict
with the reckless intensity of the prodigal
Returned more devout.

Because I am irresponsible.
Because I love the way you make me feel
I do not fear you, but the reflection.
When I am quiet, I know.
I feel the way I feel regardless of and despite you.

I frighten easy, you see.