It's The Real Thing!

It's advertised as the "Real thing!"
And you know that used to be true.
Back when the folks used to drink "Coke,"
It was like a good "Whiskey Brew!"

Then someone in the FDA,
Probably because he was bribed.
Checked out the "Coke's" ingredients,
And found the "Coca drug" inside.

It seemed that this ingredient,
That comes straight from the "Coca leaves."
Was a drug that gave a real "High,"
Just like a good whiskey achieved.

It did indeed make folks feel good,
More so after a long hard day.
And no one saw no harm in this,
Except the bribe-bought FDA!

This bribed man from the FDA,
Went and got the recipe' banned.
While he counted his silver coins,
We lost the "best" drink in the land!

So the "Coke" people had to change,
The "best" recipe' for their drink.
The "Coca" came out and ruined all,
They should have lynched that crook I think!

Then a "Dummy" changed it some more,
And tried to bring out the "New Coke."
This "Dummy" almost shut Coke down,
Because this drink was just a joke!

And then more in desperation,
The new "Classic Coke" was then made.
It was hoped it would fire things up,
But it just didn't make the grade!

If the Coke owners were REAL smart,
They'd give a party for that man.
They'd castrate him and kick his ass,
And throw him out right on his can!!