Life's Quandary

Life's Quandary

When I was born I was torn from the womb
Which was where I wanted to stay

What I fear now is death
so I cling to each breath
and pray that I wake up each day

When I want least to sleep
I sleep right away
Then my dreams are seductive
I don't want the new day

I awake but in bed I tarry and linger
I don't want to get into the fray
But business is business and sleep is a waste
So I get up and I'm off and away

When I need most to work
I act like a jerk
And try as I might
I just play

I want to be early so of course I am late
I'm first at the finish when I'm left at the gate
What will be my destruction
is my will to create

When I want most to be erudite
The stupidest things come to mind
When I want to be witty and terribly pretty
I'm ugly and dull and unkind

Whenever I'm fat my clothes are too tight
But when I get skinny they never fit right

When I want to want to write verses my words never rhyme
What seems to be awful turns out sublime

When I want to be sexy I'm told I'm a slut
When I act like a virgin I'm told "give it up"

If I'm a victim I'm blamed for the crime
When I'm found to be guilty I can't do the time

I'm told to shut up when I want to be heard
I'm asked for advice and I'm told its absurd

So I mind my own business and all goes to hell
It would have worked out if I'd tended it well

I vote for a leader who turns to a fraud
When there ought to be symmetry all is discord

Lewd sex isn't sex and pure thoughts aren't pure
A wife's not enough
What they want is a where

But the whore is a saint
But the saint's not adored
What seems to be sickness is often the cure

When I want to be straight
I can't stop getting high
When I'm telling the truth
I'm told it's a lie

When its spring I want autumn
Its cold, I want hot
What I thought was most needed
I needed it not

When I'm poor I want riches
but wealth makes me sad
I think that I'm sane but they all think I'm mad

My anger is merry
my hate turns to love
I reach for the bottom and find it above

My sorrow brings gladness
My rages bring lust
Just when I can't I find that I must

My frowns turn to smiles
I speak no one hears
I win through my trials
I laugh through my tears

I often hear silence
And misty is clear
If I'm reliant I'm too scared to steer

I don't want what I need
I hunger; can't eat
And what tastes most bitter is usually sweet

I want to be good so I have to be bad
If I want to be happy
I'm sure I'll feel sad

Paucity's wealth
and sickness is health
I want to be seen so I always use stealth

Wisdom is nonsense and nonsense is clear
What I most want is what I most fear

The question's the answer
but the answer's not sound
It all seems askew I must turn it around

Whatever I think I don't need I find
But I'm very careful; don't cast it aside
because when I want it I'm sure it will hide

The weakest have power
The richest are poor
The meekest are mighty
The lovers abhor
]
When I was young I wanted more years
And as the years pass its age that I fear

If I live life to the fullest
Will it just pass me by?
If I start asking questions will I never know why?

When I want most to live will it be time to die?
"Please don't let life end!"
Will that be my last cry?

So death must be life and to leave is to stay
I pray hell is heaven when my life slips away