- Erotic Poetry
- Mountains
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Click herethere we were little rusty buckets of dirt
running down our lives to thrill
the evening catches eyeshadows
we wont to want no butterflies in stomach aching
to release the colored moss blankets
you stared away awake with delicate taste
too cool and warmth of white effervescence lapsed into hills
and the valleys between your thoughts as I smile
the time alone above the mountain laughs
- COMMENTS
jthserraalmost 20 years agobut as a reader I need your help here. Some punctuation would help me break up the lines in the manner you intended. After several reads, I know how I want to read it, but I wonder if that's what you intend. I think the mountain slang adds some color to the poem, but made reading difficult on a few lines. An interesting poem, nice work...
jim : )
