- Erotic Poetry
- on the boat
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Click hereWe sailed with Paul Gauguin towards
an infinite horizon, while
dolphins surged along the bow, and
creamy angels, dressed up as clouds,
whispered secrets to the ocean.
Warm winds dissipated thought to
far reaches of the universe;
and, I sunned in mindless, naked
indolence. I felt cool salt spray
when we tacked; and, the hot touch of
the island girl kissing my lips.
My blood pulsed to creation's hum;
paradise overflowed my mouth.
We were divine; we were sublime.
The boat rocked on the gentle swells;
and seawater lapped against the hull.
The island was cloaked in deep greens.
Frigate birds circled in the blue.
- COMMENTS
jthserraabout 13 years agothough EH has some good points, I found a lot of lines that were wonderfully surreal. The last line especially.
jth : )
Esperanza_Hidalgoabout 13 years agokind of takes away from what is a good verse. (infinite horizon, how bout potential horizon, or sanguin horizon, or--must be sumptin else). Always was a sucker for art references, so I overlooked a couple of words that bugged me....5
Liarabout 13 years agoA few outstanding lines here
"creamy angels, dressed up as clouds,"
You break the illusion a little here and there, where it almost slips into cliché, ("We were divine; we were sublime." is telling and not showing) but all in all, you deliver a solid picture of paradise proportions. Me likey.
Kobaabout 13 years agoI think this was a great piece! The imagery is tantalyzing! I enjoyed reading it, then savoring it! Well done!
