Once more, with feeling (reprise)

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Part 2 of the 2 part series

Updated 03/12/2021
Created 04/08/2008
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Escape anathema
Gray gray gray beginnings, each day
foggy forgettable landscape, sorry episodes
Chapters stained with teardrops

Battle stations. Dress down, get out
Identity irrelevant, what’s left
To find the grail or fail
At least trying to achieve

Something other than no way
Out, and about others, alike in isolation
Try to read intentions, ephemeral
Static shocks, misread Morse codes

Like words in books, momentary
Reality only a paragraph long,
Purpose to pull and pluck
Then evaporate into sounds familiar

Syllables, in common consciousness
I know once I shared this thread of everyness
Now buried in fabric indeterminate
Let’s unravel together


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4 Comments
unpredictablebijouunpredictablebijoualmost 16 years ago
Graceful language

You pay a great deal of attention to word choice, sound and phrase, and it shows in the delicacy of your construction here. Well done.

LeBrozLeBrozalmost 16 years ago
██

In a sense this feels like a stripped down version of the original, and yet, it comes across in a more positive light. It doesn't feel near as depressing as the original.

champagne1982champagne1982almost 16 years ago
~

I found this to be a rapid fire burst of perceptions that are drawing the reader through a hurtful landscape, at last to find a bit of calm in a backwater eddy and eventually come unknotted. Good imagery. This poem is mentioned on the New Poems Review thread in literotica's Poetry Feedback and Discussion forum.

KOLKOREKOLKOREalmost 16 years ago
A brand new poem

To your credit I do not think this poem is actually a reprise of the former poem by the same name.

This one is much more of contemplative overview on a wide range of themes: trying to make sense of ones wrought by routine life; trying to understand one’s (our) lonely stand in life – you certainly put a lot on your plate, but it seemed to hold together despite it’s ‘high brow’ nature. This one is much more existential conceptual ‘meta-poem’; the previous IMO stayed on level ground being more experiential – here and that have happened (poetically speaking). Defying some recent normative judges : this and that are legit children of big poetry Mama…

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