- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Paradise Divide
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Dissenting outlook breaking peace
Splitting the views that confirm
Grinding to a conviction halt
Pressure building must soon release
Harmony soon to end its term
Vitriol and stones quickly begin to fly
Riots and gas seep through streets
Fight to declare who's at fault
Dirty tricks brought out by the sly
Chlorine gas and hob-nailed cleats
Fire bombs are burning both parties
Showing futility of the entire fight
Waste of the paradise divide
Leaving skeleton remains adversaries
Crawling through the fast fading light
The survivors come together bloody
Walking careful with wary watchful eye
Fear still buried bright inside
Shaking hands once a treaty is ready
Relaxing and wondering why many had to die
- COMMENTS
Desejoalmost 11 years agoThis is an evocative poem that immediately takes the reader (at least one with any clue about history) to past wars. While on a first read it seemed to me to be about WWI (the divide being the trenches, chlorine/mustard gas, hobnailed boots) the firebombing reference made me wonder about WWII...but then that did not really end in a Treaty (so you made me think, which is always good). I think this poem could be stronger with a couple of slight changes: there are some extra words, and some of the ing words could be changed (eg. burning to burn or burns, etc).
todski28almost 11 years agois always, to me at least, powerfully emotive. I have read a few of them now and I always seem to come away feeling something. this leaves me feeling sad at the futility of it all. it happens over and over this perpetuation of wars and unneccesary deaths. I love this line
Vitriol and stones quickly begin to fly
as it is the natural progression of violence.
and I feel this
The survivors come together bloody
Walking careful with wary watchful eye
Fear still buried bright inside
Shaking hands once a treaty is ready
Relaxing and wondering why many had to die
Finishes the poem perfectly.
