Perspective Shift

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Liar
Liar
59 Followers

Liar
Liar
59 Followers
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15 Comments
tazz317tazz317about 12 years ago
FOR CAMPING OUT

and photographing. TK U MLJ LV NV

AmyfriendAmyfriendabout 17 years ago
Wonderful scenery..

in the illustration, bonded by fine words.

KOLKOREKOLKOREabout 17 years ago
A mindful spirit

Both text and picture are very strong. Thematically I believe I could have identified you without your title, in other words it’s definitely you. Your struggle with the process of creativity with the sources of inspiration internal and external and of course the harsh self critic (or doubter) which taunt and argue until somewhere towards the end the more “naïve” (in the good sense) the less self aware (in the bad sense) erupts and expresses you almost despite you. Now that was not only on this poem, but certainly included it. *****

It seems that you made a conscious effort to weave, almost to integrate, the text into the picture. In the process you manipulated both the text (font color changes) and the picture. If I am not mistaken, it could be an optical illusion, but even so, something worked, the area of the picture surrounding the line: “to lure your blinders wide open” seems grainier than the rest of the picture. It could be just the result of the visual contrast dark – light next to each other. I don’t know enough about photography (but would like to hear some background about the technique of the work here). Moreover, the context of the manipulations is content sensitive. We “sail” right over the horizon with the line: dancing choreographed on the horizon” and we are “submerged” just below it in the line: “of your limited imagination”. The strongest “intervention” in the picture is of course with the line: “to lure your blinds wide open”, which is highlighted with background which breaks with color and light scheme of its surrounding, clearly creating a visual metaphors for the blinders mentioned in that line. *****

There are very few works that dare doing this level of dialog text photo. Despite one reservation it’s a very impressive imaginative work. Congratulations! *****

Why do I chose to express my one reservation, because I believe every poet who put their 100 effort into their work deserve if we just can our 100 response for the poet’s benefit. What could have been easier for me than just stop after congratulations? Or even just say great original work (all true).

My sense is that not unlike your familiar theme – that of an internal struggle with over self awareness as a poet which finally allows your best comes when you let go and just let things flow in a less planned, less organized, more intuitive way -= so is the case with this poem.*****

You collected and put together both the poem and the photo. It would have worked just as strongly, maybe even stronger, if you allowed the reader to make some of the connections between the text and the photo. Still, up to a point, say, including the horizon and under the horizon lines it was playful. On the other hand, the blinder element, although it has an immediate attention getting and dramatic effect, after a while it takes away some from the poem. The visual blinders amount to be an overstatement. Had you had some natural equivalent in the photo (equivalent to the horizon) you could have used it. But since such natural occurring element did not exist, it was a mistake to super impose artificial blinders over the photo. We could have read and might have researched the photo, maybe we could have come with some visual elements that were parallel to the blinders, maybe not. Maybe the ultimate overall atmosphere and POV of the photo are the main gate to the text rather than the one on one item by item more literal approach in that respect. *****

Again, overall strong work and I do hope that my thoughts will be taken in the spirit they were made: constructive and appreciative.

Thank you for your work,

Yaron (kolkore)

LeBrozLeBrozabout 17 years ago
~~

It's that kiss that changes everything.

LeBrozLeBrozabout 17 years ago
~~

It's that kiss that changes everything.

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