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Click hereWhat a dream to see...
Standing there, by the window at my friend's room.
Having my headphones on with the music blasting,
Smoking the never-ending plant.
Sounds and lights swayed around me to the fullest nature.
I saw everything as it was, and nothing more.
Everything softened as I watched everything slowed down.
Music played on through my ears,
The girl singing her heart out.
I looked around as everything moved in dot matrix,
I saw myself falling, falling in the most slowest and torturous way
My neck focused on the edge of the window.
I felt my face smile while feeling so different.
As my expression changed to sadness,
I realized I hit that window.
While laying on the vital edge of the window,
I saw myself standing behind me.
Unmoveable nor any words coming out of me,
I layed there listening to the Chinese song,
It was very sad, she sang a beautiful song -somewhat sad.
I couldn't bear it, it brought all the thoughts I had in my head.
And then it started.
I watched, as I felt a wave of misery coming to me,
My friends, running like headless chickens,
What are they supposed to do?
I then realized that I really hit the ledge against my neck,
I wasn't moving and my eyes open undoubtfully.
Was I dead?
My heart pumped hard against my throat,
I wanted to scream but this annoying song played through my ears,
I wanted to cry but I couldn't.
They finally touched me.
They got hold of me and stood me up,
I came back to my senses.
I pretended that it was the most amazing feeling, as they calmed down.
I took off the awful, lovely song and put on some tranic music.
It didn't take long before I closed my eyes and wanted to go back.
I wanted to know what it was that I was feeling.
As I heard my name calling out for me,
I smiled and felt myself go into trance again.
I was falling and I accepted it.
With a hard bang, I was out.
I didn't really care if I had hit that ledge again.
I realized that there was a bigger picture out there.
This life is just a dimension of life.
On every heart beat,
I saw a flash of light pouncing on me.
I was dead… right?
I heard a metallic ball fall on a layer of floor.
I found it amusing, although knowing the unknown,
As it rolled, a view of picture appeared.
A dull white pyramid backed with complete darkness.
Suddenly it started to unwind,
It was a piece of cloth.
I was dead, I thought
I was my judgment…
I never thought it would be like this.
I couldn’t believe my life had been over,
And here I waited for something…
A flash of light circled,
As my friend’s tried to awake me.
Was this how people feel when they are dying?
I saw their face once as everything disappeared,
The thread continued on.
Flashbacks started to begin,
I never stopped seeing the thread pulling from the cloth,
But now I even heard the thread pulling,
I started seeing my early childhood times,
“I’m dying” I thought to myself.
Another beam of light showing one of my friends calling me.
“Yes, wake me up! Please” Didn’t matter…
It continued.
I was gone.
I have completely felt my body give away,
As I took the last breath,
And I was out into the dream of my judgment.
The thread pulled hard as I felt that I was chocking.
The thread continued as if for eternity.
I thought I had a long life and it was finally over,
I had lived all my lives to complete the – puzzle.
Yes the puzzle that I always thought of life.
And it was just recently that I realized it.
I thought God had finally given me everything for me,
To know, the wisdom… everything.
I wasn’t ready to go, but it didn’t matter.
I wished that it wasn’t this way,
Then again, maybe it was just a defense mechanism.
On the thought of the that,
The thread pulled faster,
I started fearing more as the pain grew with the thread.
Flashbacks speeding up on the process.
It felt like a movie to me.
Everything was cold and with no emotions,
Just like watching the portrait of a leafless tree.
Was it supposed to be so flat?
Then once more time, I see a flash of my friend’s face calling me,
It didn’t last a tenth as it did before.
Pain intensified as the thread came to the end.
I started seeing blue and red flashes,
The flashbacks stopped at the point,
It looked like the cop lights,
I heard the 911 phone tone
I was dead…
For a reason I knew the lights and phone tone is something,
It is the “what is going to happen soon” thing.
I felt my heart-beat again, but very weak.
The thread pulled very hard as if the clothing was tight,
It slowed down but unmentionable pain passed thru me.
Addition to the heart-beat, everything started flashing.
I saw a small bright light ahead of me.
Instead of flashbacks, I started seeing things that I was doing,
Perhaps if I was still alive.
It was very warm, I liked what I was seeing.
Filled with happiness.
I was very, very happy.
As the thoughts left me,
I was projected onto the thread as I was unwinded into a shape,
Like a white cocoon.
With a flash, I came across the light,
Like a ticking of the clock,
I said in my language: “Pita, Putru, Pobitror-arthra, namé Amen”
It came out as I was trained to say when I grew up from youth by my mother,
The belief in God before I die.
The words echoed with my mother’s voice.
I meant: “In the name of God, Jesus Christ, and the holy Spirits, Amen”.
At the point of “Amen”, I saw the image of The Pawn.
The icon on a chessboard.
I have found the truth – I was piece of item of a game.
I couldn’t believe it, I didn’t accept it.
I laid sideways, watching the pawn on the corner dark box facing left,
Everything was quiet, that was it.
Game over, as I felt it.
I thought to myself that this is how it all ends.
I didn’t accept this as my end.
As whispers came upon me,
I saw my friend’s face again, calling my name.
I willed to see it again, and I did.
One more time… and I woke up from my sense of virtuosity
I was laughing, and they saw it.
I heard them talking among themselves about me,
“Yes, I’m still here!” I thought to myself.
It didn’t last long…
My fingers curled up around like making seismic waves,
As I left back to the dream…
I changed into a ghostly creature,
Evaporating up with the others,
I was a soul taken out of my body,
I was twirling and spinning and screaming,
I was finally black and white and flew up,
…Somewhere.
The train of thought went back to the pawn image,
As I was placed onto the fires of hell,
I was in hell.
In the torture moment, I screamed and reached for the sky.
…I was in hell.
Suddenly I realized something,
Seven
Everything felt confusing, but I knew one thing,
I knew 7
As I burned eternally in the fire,
I kept it mind that where ever I may go next,
I will remember “7”
My thought went back to the pawn as I kept in mind for the number.
Having the feeling of burning, I willed myself.
Suddenly, things darkened.
The pawn being a silhouette with a background of flashing light
The lights were blue and red.
The pawn started to change into the horse, the knight.
When realizing the horse, I saw an icon.
It was Beauty & the Beast’s icon.
It was facing left.
Meanwhile the right-side submerged into a knight of a kind.
It looked like a Trojan soldier.
(to be continued...)