questioning our national defense

questioning our national defense

My love, embraced again in this consuming glow,
     why do we imagine our romance persists
     through years of hurts and separations?

Rootless army brats, the both of us, cast together
     in one unlikely place after another –
     is our bond soulful destiny or
     just an unintended consequence of
     the exigencies of our national defense?  

Have you considered that the tender object of
     your affection has fucked more men
     than I can remember? And, if so,
     my love, how can you forgive me?

Am I to believe the ten-year old inside of me
     still retains your trust, your devotion?
     Is our long affair a game to avoid
     admitting that neither of us can
     commit to any honest relationship?  

You know I'm not the gap-toothed, golden child
     that lives in your dreams, don't you?
     And, won't you abandon me again
     when I, inevitably, disappoint you?    

And, my love, when we break up once more,
     whether on my whim or yours,
     how am I to endure it?