Reality

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It was a day here and a day there, but it was not same anywhere
It was so late for you and late for me, but we were still there.
It was across the oceans and around the world, still we sat for it
It was just the first time but we were close as we just felt.

Frantic, I felt you were, but I wished it to be a bit more slow
Specific, I was since I wanted it should never go so low.
Feverish, my body ached but kept on, wanted this to work out
Sleepish, you felt tried due to the hours you spent, wanted to opt out.

I saw your eyes, it told stories and I read and kept it inside
I cant lie, I said it all, never wanted to lie, never did hide.
I felt so vacuum, you felt a bit hurt, after all we were clean
I said I'm honest and I wish you can count that, as you can see.

The trust came out from the seed so fast, an amount of nurture it need
The voice came out from your end, feel so happy and content, indeed.
The way it all happened, bizzare in yours words, was so fast I guess
The fact is simple, life is strange and cant just figure out, no fuss.

Reality is reckoning, you behind the scene and my hand on keys
Acceptability, the matter which may cost you some time, to think, you see.
Credibility is on the offering and take me as the real one
Electricity, the outcome since we seems to generate some power, that's on.

I opened up, transparent, queries welcome and answers too from your end
Inch by inch, life goes up and down, someone to share, sorrows and pain.
Investing in a future without guilt, have trust and be happy for what we are.
Interesting connection, across the lands and seas, let us live and let die here.

Cutestguy

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2 Comments
SexymommakatSexymommakatover 13 years ago
A bit harsh

I do have to say, this is one of his better poems. Here's a little hint to writing poetry. Write it how you'd say it. Comas and the end of the line are used as breaks. Read it out loud when you proof read it. It makes all the difference in the world.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
Desperately Dull

Truly awful, there's no flow, no rhythm and the rhymes are so forced as to be painful

Some of the ideas and concepts are interesting but aren't developed well enough and the language is too much of a mix of archaic constructs and modern constructs which jar and make no sense

Do you really have any idea what poetry actually is? because this is not it