tagErotic PoetrySanta's a Happy Man!

Santa's a Happy Man!

byUncle Pervey©

Santa Claus made the Dwarf's house, his last place to stop,
Ever since his party, his mind was on Snowwhite.
His mouth would go dry, from the thought of her pussy,
He thought about it's heat, and how it fit so tight!

Santa and Snowwhite, got a love affair started,
And Santa started spending nights away from home.
Mrs. Claus soon figured out, from the Elf's snickers,
There must be a reason why she sat home alone!

Mrs. Claus put "Rudy" on Santa Claus's trail,
She knew "Rudy" would find out where he was stopping.
"Rudy" followed Santa Claus around for a week,
Then he reported, "Santa sure isn't shopping!"

Then he told Mrs. Claus about Santa's affair,
Mrs. Claus turned red and screached, "I'll take him to court!
I'll hire that hungry lawyer that lives down at Nome,
I'll sue and take everything he's got, through the court!"

Santa Claus made his "Debut," in the Divorce Court,
And he didn't think he'd need a lawyer there.
He waited for his turn, and then addressed the Judge,
"There's something here Judge that I think you're unaware!"

"I've got an extended family that's not known,
You know all of them Elfs that's working in my shop?
Well they ain't Elfs your Honor, not by any means,
When we're alone, every one of them calls me "Pop!"

"You remember Miss Monroe of Hollywood fame?
I became her Daddy one foggy Christmas eve.
Now if you check your memory, you'll figure out,
That the Midgets from this "Adam" came from his "Eve!"

I've spent two centurys, or more, with this woman,
And I've spent a lot of nights with her, fathering.
With all the kids I've sired with her, there's not been one,
That's ever grown full sized from my "bothering!"
"Judge I hate to say this, but I'll tell you the truth,
Have you ever took a ride through a big tunnel?
Whenever I try to make love to Mrs. Claus,
It's just like loving the wrong end of a funnel!"

"Now let me introduce you to the girl I love,
Come up here and say hello to the Judge, Snowwhite.
Now as you can see Judge, she's really quite a girl,
And she's got a pussy that's clean, and warm, and tight!"

"Now your Honor this is my side of the divorce,
If you had YOUR choice between Miz Claus and Snowwhite.
Which way do you think YOU'D jump, with this love affair,
With the Washington tunnel, or with something tight!"

The Judge called a recess, and went out of the room,
He needed to study his book about the laws.
When he came back in, he called the Court to order,
And screwed Santga with his "Decree" for Mrs. Claus!

Now Mrs. Claus is in "Vegas" living it up,
And Santa is footing the bills for all her play.
But he thinks Mrs. Claus just got what she was due,
And "Santa's a Happy Man" with Snowwhite, today!!

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byUncle Pervey© 1 comments/ 3111 views/ 0 favorites

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