Shouldn't I

Shouldn’t I be grateful for all I have been given?
Shouldn’t I be thankful for the life I’m living?

Shouldn’t I be content that I have what I need?
Shouldn’t I rejoice and not covet in greed?

And yet I find a discontent that fosters deep
A solid yearning that keeps me from sleep

A growling hunger that paces insides
Walking to and fro across my battered hide

An icy frost has settled on my soul
A torturous reality that marks its toll

Shouldn’t I escape from these maniacal meanderings?
Shouldn’t I find hope in my mind’s wanderings?

Shouldn’t a day go by without utter despair?
Shouldn’t I have one moment to breathe the air?

As time crawls ever forward, I see
There is naught to hope for me

This hungry beast has claimed its reward
Striking me down with its eternal sword

I realize, with a long drawn out sigh
I should be happy, shouldn’t I?