Skewing the Demographics

Skew the demographics!

The cashier never fails to hand to me
a foot of curled-up coupons.
She rolls her eyes and thrusts the wad
of paper along with the plastic card
that attests to the fact that I am
a most valuable super important customer.

Yes, I admit it. I sell the details of my life
for pennies off ice cream and tampons.
I sell myself to places that record every purchase
of what I bought, when I bought it
and what method of payment was used.

I glance at my super customer discount amount-
Today, my soul was worth twelve ninety-five,
but there's a buy one get one free event
coming up next week...on cat food.

The promise of saving forty cents
screams in neon orange and blue.
I wonder if there is a database
with some geek keeping track of customers
and their check-out coupon use.

Where do I fall? Am I an anti-social freak
because I don't use them?
I am curious to know how much longer
they will continue to shit them out
at purchase time, knowing I never use them.

I'm screwing with your percentages, Boys!

Wadded paper in my hand, I aim
for the trash can when I happen to see
a survey on the back, especially for me.

For a quick five minutes online
the coupon becomes buy one get two free.

That's a good deal, What can I say?