- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Solace
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Sky. Flat clouds, dark grey below,
a little whiter higher up – their lines
a reinforcement of the flat horizon.
The old road lies like a ragged line
below, the grass along the verges
edging in upon the asphalt, worn
and cracked… and when we see
another hour get rained away, we are
still stuck beneath unsmiling sky,
too cold to speak or even wonder why
we cared to come this way today – but then
the rowan has red berries on display.
- COMMENTS
twelveooneover 11 years agow/o comment
tell go tell the sonnet guy what he did wrong, better he hear it from a beleiver
Angelineover 11 years agoI like the subtle rhyme, which packs a nice punch of color and ends the poem on a hopeful note.
I might lose a few words that seem unnecessary to me and maybe avoid saying "line" more than once, but overall a strongly visual piece with a theme that's conveyed well. 5ed it. :-)
Ashesh9over 11 years ago& then a rained out person stuck on the ground ....! Bravo , Demure , bravo ! a panoramic paint-brush worthy of a Hollywoodian canvas !
