- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Something Seductive in that State
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It was just a little ditty, really
something I thought up
as I watched a daisy sway
and wondered how it might feel.
Grounded like that
but still moved
and blossoming too;
can that happen to people?
It was just something that came along
snatched a thought from my head
and held it captive
as I zoned out, unaware.
It was nothing, really
but there was something seductive in that state
of feeling life there
and losing myself here.
- COMMENTS
bluebellover 16 years agoWhat a fantastically compact and potent poem. I enjoyed everything about it and am inclined to disagree with twelve (sorry) about the stanzas. I think the breaks are perfect- they add terrifically to the flow of the poem. It becomes the very thought you wanted to capture. Well done.
twelveooneover 16 years agoas a suggestion you should try stanza breaks, I don't ever remember you using them. See what happens.
