- Non-Erotic Poetry
- swoop
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Click herewinged sunset,
outlined
in midnight hue.
graceful tapistry
of regal beauty,
monarch princess,
fluttering
in calm ocean breeze,
warily avoiding
the ferocity
below.
darting screamers,
hungry gulls,
a startled blink,
plucked with speed,
her dancing grace..
so busy watching
waves
that swallow,
she missed the swoop,
winged waves
above
- COMMENTS
Anonymousalmost 20 years ago...does birds like fawnie. The feeling of flight and fragile freedom in this poem is so weell done. Great read!
normal jeanalmost 20 years agothe beach and waves and butterflies, your poems are getting stronger with each submission and I agree that it could use some tweaking, but I enjoyed this one very much ;)
perksalmost 20 years agoEumie and I are talking about this poem, and this is a pretty poem, maybe not so easy to read after some of the hard ass hitters we've had, so take this with a grain of salt. It's ok, but one part that really bites my ass is the whole "monarch" princess thing. I'm seeing a butterfly at sunset/twilight, over an ocean with a big wave. Now the royal part, continues the monarch part, but it also lends itself to images of "blues" especially since you have so many colorful concepts in this poem. However, we know that a monarch is orangy and black, so the image gets a little muddled in it's colors. It's a sweet poem, with a horrible ending, not in the writing in the experiencing. It's like watching "Bambi meets Godzilla" if you've ever seen that movie, it's a hoot.
Tathagataalmost 20 years agothink MY stuff is sad??
; )
It's very nice fawnie
You are getting so much better every day
some great images here and a very " philosophical" poem
hehehe
Thank you sweetheart
