- Non-Erotic Poetry
- The Road to Perdition
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Damned with faint praise
on the road to perdition, carrying
a suitcase full of misdemeanours
trailing from broken locks,
dropped off here and there
like a travelling salesman.
Surely the road wasn't this steep
when I passed this way before,
but I was younger then
full of vigour,
sins not so sinfull
or so I thought.
So it comes to this.
- COMMENTS
SeattleRainover 13 years agoWhen I feel my last line is not really last line material, I often move it to the top. Makes for a fun flip, a preview.
I love suitcase full of misdemeanor.
Thanks for the read! I could relate :)
Angelineover 13 years agoand I agree with Liar about some wonderful lines here, but it weakens toward the end as it seems too vague to me. Some poems hit it on the nail, some not quite but I'd work with what's good here. Your considerable talents are never absent from your poems.
Liarover 13 years ago...from your latest batch of vignettes. This is more condensed, less directly narrative, and delivers, at least to me, a heavier emotional punch. And some killer lines.
a suitcase full of misdemeanours
trailing from broken locks,
