- Erotic Poetry
- The Words It Took
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The words it took ensure her smiles won't fade,
despite the look of boredom: there to grace
the irritated mien, she’s now displayed;
but, such annoyance is not out of place.
It will not last and, like a storm at sea,
will blow away and leave a calming time,
in which she rests and looks across at me
to find the reason to compound her rhyme.
She rises to new playfulness again,
wanting fresh accounts; let love now flatter
so charmingly, and, yet, it won't remain
as first discovered. Still, it is no matter
that I can’t fix the spot, the hour, the look,
for, in her head, she hears the words it took.
- COMMENTS
vrosej10over 13 years agoI found it hard to follow and I did enjoy the 'irritated mien' comment but not being an expert in the more classical forms of poetry, I'll refrain from further comment.
twelveooneover 13 years agolittle to add, except best of the day;score 100
More: irritated mien
Less: storm at sea
PoetGuyover 13 years agoPoet Guy applauds the use of caesura to break up the normally steady dah-DAH dah-DAH da-DAH of the iambic line, and particularly likes the insertion of a feminine end-rhyme (flatter/matter) to mix up the sound of the poem. The use of the word "rhyme" seemed a bit forced to Poet Guy, but overall he found the sonnet pleasing, if not exceptional. Thanks.
