this letter

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that morning was brisk and foggy outside
when the thoughts of death entered my mind.
the pain and hate that were all around
they covered me so i could hear no sound.
no sound of love, no sound of hope
why should i hear these sounds when i have no hope.
i want to believe that this isn’t happening to me
it’s hard to believe that no one cares for me.
soon it will be over and no one will care
and then not one person will be in despair
that lonely house with no love inside
and from this there is no place to hide
to hide from this like i’m playing a game
this dreadful game that is coming to claim
claim what it wants and takes what it needs
i have learned to pay attention, to heed
it takes all i have and much, much more
all i want to do is close the door
close the door to hate and pain and sorrow
i’m so in debt to Satan, so in debt i cannot borrow
i cannot borrow enough from God to pay for what i’ve
done
and i feel my problems have only begun
finally one day i’ll be able no more
and in my blood they will find me on the floor.
and then i will be gone and things will be better
keep my memories in your heart and in your mind forever…
this letter

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