To All The Toys I've Owned Before

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My apologies to Willie Nelson and Julio Inglesias!!!

~~~

TO ALL THE TOYS I'VE OWNED BEFORE
By Wildo Nelson and Who's In My Introitus


To all the toys I've owned before
And kept inside my nightstand drawer
Vibrating eggs and big ol' dongs
I dedicate this song
To all the toys I've owned before

I love the toys I've owned before
They made me cum, then cum some more
Some by tickling my clit,
Some inside, a nice tight fit
I love the toys I've owned before

The batteries are always dying
And every time I go buy more
The batteries keep right on dying
Am I some kind of sex toy whore?

So many toys throughout the years
I wish I had them all right here
They gave me such delight
Morning, noon, and night
So many toys throughout the years

A few of those toys quit on me
They just stopped working suddenly
Halfway through the ride,
"But I'm not done!!!!" I cried
When some of my toys quit on me

The batteries are always dying
And every time I go buy more
The batteries keep right on dying
Am I some kind of sex toy whore?

As for the toys that broke because
I maybe got a wee bit rough
I wish I could take back
Those overzealous whacks
Though there's no proof that was the causeā€¦

To all the toys I've owned before
That gave me orgasms galore
When I'm horny and alone
I dedicate my moans
To all the toys I've owned before

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8 Comments
Nirtygurl92Nirtygurl92about 5 years ago
Loved this!

True and also funny so relatable to many people out there I'm sure. Definitely enjoyed this piece.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
SIMPLY EXQUISITE

THIS IS A PIECE OF FUN AND LITERARY COMPOSURE. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK LONGFELLOW

Jenny_JacksonJenny_Jacksonabout 17 years ago
Heh heh heh...

Keep it up girl. That was great :D

RedHairedandFriendlyRedHairedandFriendlyabout 17 years ago
snickers....

We must shop at the same store! Mine break and yet, I go by more. ~ Great!! Red.

Unbridled_PassionUnbridled_Passionabout 17 years ago
now I've heard everything!

songs about your sex toys-too funny!

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