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Click hereShe was a maiden all forlorn
her father gone to war,
had his fortune then to spend
but still she wanted more.
Something to wile away the time
though nothing could be felt
she wore beneath her garments
a trusty chastity belt
Her father dear to keep her
chaste had fastened up the lock
keeping out Sir Cuthbert
and his dastardly cock.
The cock was used to barnyard
ways and rolling in the hay
keeping the chicks all sated
as he had his dirty way.
Espying maiden all forlorn
and being not a gent
he tried his luck upon the belt
but got his pecker bent.
The maiden smiled, as wont to do
but not amused was he
till from her ample bosom
the maid produced the key.
With father gone I didn't wait
ransacking all his drawers,
what pluck he cried it's now
time, that I was searching yours.
They fumbled and they fiddled
in passion garments rent
till conceding in frustration
the bloody key was bent!
Poetry Survivor
Second round Ballad
You have SUCH a wicked sense of humour! Another very good one! I have a new favourite poet here! It's a pity that the poetry section is so undersubscribed! I hope that you've considered having these published more widely.