- Erotic Poetry
- Trilobite
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Trilobite
Inhabited stone
a million sparkling nothings
adorning its convex breasts
soft, yet firm
in conviction – the saw blade slicing,
unafraid of consequence
and a woman
like a river, like a thousand rivers
becomes an echo
reverberating cliché.
Still a hero, hard
erect and pulsing
penetrates the dull awareness,
blind fingers guiding him
into soft flesh
yielding, always yielding
to the incredibly mundane,
dripping erotic truth
in remote impossibility
and still, still... still it is a woman
so like a river
we’ve heard before, trickling
in a vast, miniature cavern
sawn in the stone:
inhabited.
- COMMENTS
TheRainManabout 18 years agoEnjoyed the read.
this, I found of questionable necessity, and below the rest of the poem:
dripping erotic truth
in remote impossibility
and it also, IMO, takes away form the beautiful grouping below it, namely:
and still, still... still it is a woman
so like a river
This:
sawn in the stone:
inhabited.
... is excellent.
lobomaoabout 18 years agoonce an ancient and humble thing
as common as carbon and stone
endures the age old elements
or the pullpush pressure of time passing
rolls itself up and digs itself in
determined to be remembered
and answers it's own question
My love will still be here,
but where oh where are you?
Maria2394about 18 years agoand so is the poem, but I think it could maybe be clarified a little bit. YOu lost me somewhere around line 6 I think. I felt it needed some breaks and the ..... interrupt the whole thing.
I am not putting your work down, understand, I enjoyed the poem, but it could use some work. and heck, i didnt even know "sawn" was a word, so I even learnt something :)
twelveooneabout 18 years agopretty much just wieghing in with score
like this end for the title
sawn in the stone:
inhabited.
LeBrozabout 18 years agoSo many meanings and levels of thought;
Enough, I hope, to give every reader pause...
