You Think I'm Worthless

I’m worthless, no better than dirt.
You remind me this so many times
Every day, in so many ways
Just so I won’t forget.

Just when I think you are through
You start all over again,
To see how far you can grind me
Down this time.

When I confront you about this
You start yelling and twist my words.
Tell me you never said those things,
Trying to make me look stupider than you
Think I am.

You yell at me and tell me
You hope I can’t read someday,
Which either means I’m blind
Or I’m finally dead.

You’ve never been this mean
And vindictive before,
But your temper is changing.
I actually flinched this time,
Instead of standing ramrod straight to your harsh words,
Because I thought you were going to hit me.
You have to be the almighty man,
The one always in charge.

You almost have me believing
That I’m worthless,
But I know I’m not.
Underneath this hard shell
That I now wear,
Buried deep,
So no one can see,
Is me.

Last night I felt the shell crack,
Just a little bit,
But a big enough crack that can
Be pried open and the shell
Left behind.

The old confident, sure of myself me
Will be exposed, never to be
Hidden away again.

If you don’t like this me,
The me that you married,
All those years ago.
Tough shit….
You will never walk on me again.