A Man on an Island Ch. 07

"I wouldn't mind that, "Siobhan said, suddenly without humor, "I'd have loved to have had a big sister to look up to. I was the only kid out on a farm far away from anyone my own age. I'd have killed for a big sister."

Sam was surprised at the tone and the expression that she saw. "You um ... you really mean that, don't you?"

"Yes," Siobhan said, "I was like a mouse when I was a kid, and I had to take a lot of crap from everybody at school. If I'd had a sister like you, Miss Red Sonja, I wouldn't have had to be like that. My sister would have seen to anybody who gave me trouble until they stopped. That's what sisters do, isn't it?"

Sam nodded as she looked forward, "I think so. I remember a girl who was the youngest of three kids when I was in grade school. I used to hang out with her brother when we were like eleven and I was sort of friends with the older girl, so I got to know them pretty well. Those three kids hated each other when they were at home. The youngest one was a little shit a lot of the time, and of course, now I know that she was just trying to fit with them. She didn't know how, and the older two wouldn't really allow it.

One day, the parents group was selling cones of flavored shaved ice at lunch in the yard. She tried to get herself a cone, and a larger boy took her money away from her. She had enough for two, so she bought one, but his friend jammed her cherry cone all over her dress. I knew her and I'd seen it all. I was on my way over, but I stopped to watch then as those two bullies laughed their asses off at that girl crying. They thought it was such a blast -- until they turned around and saw the other two standing there.

They might have hated their younger sibling, but right then, uh-uh. Somebody messed with their little sister, so they were gonna bleed for it. They didn't think it was all that funny then. Of course, the older two spent the afternoon in the office, and I got into trouble myself for walking right out of the classroom to go to the office so that I could back up their side of it. The school called their mother in and when she got there, she was in the face of the vice-principal, demanding to know why the yard teachers did nothing. So nothing happened to them. I thought that it would be so good to be in a family like that one.

"Yeah," Siobhan grinned, "What I wouldn't have given to have had even the chance to be a little shit for just one day! Anyway, it's my turn," she said looking as though what she had to say was really rather unimportant, "I'm a veterinarian."

"Fuck off," Sam laughed in surprise, "Get the fuck out. Seriously?"

"Yeah," Siobhan nodded, "I'm back here now to start my practice."

"Doctor Siobhan," Sam said with a chuckle, "I like it."

"It's your turn, " Siobhan said.

"I'm an animal groomer," Sam replied.

Siobhan stared. "No way. Registered?"

"Yup," Sam smiled, "Registered and looking for work, though I'll do anything right now. Sylvia said something about looking after horses. I think that I've got a surprise for her though. We're talking about the place where you grew up, right? It's the same place? Where she'd want me to work?"

"Yes!" Siobhan said.

"Do they have any blacksmith gear there? You know, like out of the movies, horseshoes and anvils?"

"Yeah," Siobhan said, "But my grandpa usually does that stuff. He's not here over the winter anymore. He's with my grandmother in Florida. If they need any shoeing done, Mom calls up a smith to come over. Why?"

"Oh, nothing much," Sam said a little airily, "Whose turn is it, anyway?"

"I dunno, "Siobhan laughed a little, "I want it to be your turn, though. This is fun."

"Ok then, I", Samantha said, "am Sam., Sam I am, and I -- that is Sam, am ... a blacksmith."

Siobhan laughed, "No way," she said, "a real blacksmith?"

"Uh-huh," Sam smiled a little proudly, "Go on, Sis," she chuckled, "Ask me if I'm registered."

Siobhan rolled her eyes, "Are you?"

"Nope," Sam grinned, "that's a licensed trade. I've got a licence to beat the shit out of metal. And there aren't many of us left."

"That's brilliant," Siobhan stared, "Where the hell did you learn that?"

Sam shrugged, "I was at a historical site and tourist attraction up in Penetanguishene. They've got a couple of tall ships there, and what's more, they have a school there to teach how to maintain them. Well for about everything else, they use college students for the summer season. A big part of keeping tall ships going is needing a blacksmith or two, but they need a licensed smith, since the boats carry people, and there aren't exactly a lot of college students who are licensed smiths and want to sweat at a smithy all summer. So I asked and they gave me an apprenticeship over the summer. I came back the next year and finished it and then I wrote the exam and did the practical exam as well.

So I can handle anything like that for your mom."

Siobhan sat with her jaw in her lap. Sam found it a little odd, since she didn't think that her revelation was worth all that. Siobhan began to laugh.

"This is too good to be true," she said, "I come home from England, and you need a place to live and begin, just like I do. You can groom and handle horses -- just when I want to start my practice and Mom and I have sent a million emails while she tried to convince me to set up at the farm. Well do you think that a vet practice and a grooming service go hand in hand, or what?"

Sam looked over and nodded, "A lot of groomers work out of a vet's office. That's where I interned."

"And my mom needs a groomer and a handler -- and now here we are on the way there, and I find out that you're a blacksmith. "She laughed a little, "I get a big step-sister and she's a blacksmith. I freaking love it. I just don't know how much of a hand she had in it."

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

Siobhan looked down then, knowing that she might have just ruined this. "I'd love to say never mind, Sam, but I like you too much already. We're ... different, my family and I. We can sometimes get things to line up a little if they were headed that way anyway. Nothing huge, just little things. We've always been like that. I think that now I'd kind of like you to forget most of what I've said for the past five minutes, but that wouldn't be right."

Sam watched as Siobhan's expression changed from sad to a little upset as she said, "Look, we were playing the best game just now and I really enjoyed that. Trying to get to know each other was a lot of fun. I'm really sorry if I wrecked it."

Sam stared at the road and then at Siobhan for a moment, "Back in the city," she said a little slowly, "The assholes in the parking lot, ... that was you, wasn't it?"

Siobhan looked down, "A little. I didn't want it to get worse. I... I think it would be better if I just sit here and you drive. You don't have to be afraid of anything. Please try to do whatever work you can agree with my mom over. She won't hurt you either, and I'll leave you alone. I'll stay at the farm long enough to find a way to start my practice somewhere else."

"Wait a minute here," Sam said, thinking on her feet a little. "You grew up all alone out there? You didn't have any friends? Why?"

"I could never make any at school," Siobhan said, "I've always had trouble like that. Mom said that I always had to be careful not to hurt anybody if they teased me or called me names, so I never did, but I didn't like being picked on. I was really shy. I still am, I guess. I was having so much fun with you, I just forgot myself, or I'd never have said anything like I did."

She looked out of the window as the afternoon faded into gloom. "I've just spent two years in another place, hoping that I f I was somewhere else, it would be different. But it wasn't. I got to know the animals that I worked on better than I got to know the people. So ... it's not the people at all, is it?

It's me." She sighed and spoke more to herself, "It's always been me."

They drove in silence for a minute and Sam knew that Siobhan was trying not to cry. She reached over and touched her arm. "Hey, Siobhan?"

Siobhan looked down at Sam's gloved hand on her sleeve and then over to see that Sam was looking at the road. "You remember when I said that I liked to sit in coffee shops and make up stories? Well I did, and sometimes I used to do that there, but, ... well, most of the times that I sat to make up stories, I was sitting alone on my rented room because I didn't know anybody. I was in a city with millions of people, and none of them wanted to know me."

"No," Siobhan whispered, "That can't be right. You're a strong person, you must be a little like your Dad or something. You're at home anywhere. I can tell. You can look the way that you do and don't care what people think or say."

She exhaled, "You can get away with wearing gloves with the fingertips cut off like that, You can wear anything and look like you belong -- things that I could never do in my life. I'm just ... nothing. You had at least a couple of boyfriends, so you know how to fit in. Please try to forget what I said, ok? Please?"

Sam looked over then and smiled just a little, "Look at me, Siobhan. I've never had a boyfriend for longer than a month -- ever. Just because I had a boyfriend doesn't mean that I was in any great love or anything like that. Most of the time, I was alone. You said that you'd have loved to have a big sister to look up to. Well I'd have loved to have had a sister too, just like I said. I'm just as lonely as you are, Siobhan. I'm just a lot louder about it, that's all.

You didn't wreck anything. You've only confused me; that's all. I don't understand you, but that doesn't mean that I don't want to. I think that we were getting to be friends, and that's about all the Christmas present that I'd want this year. I've made a lot of changes in my life because I had to, because the only way ahead for me otherwise was down.

Don't shut down now, Siobhan. I want to know you. I know that we'd only be step-sisters if your mom and my dad got married or something, but I'd love to have you as my step-sister if it meant that you were my friend. "

Siobhan wiped her face a little, "You would?"

Sam smiled, "Sure. I hope this works out -- whatever it is," Sam said, "If working with you is as much fun as just driving with you, I'm in. Where were we? It has to be your turn."

"I -- I can't think of anything more about me to tell," Siobhan said, "you want to be my friend?"

"Yup," Sam grinned, "I do. I don't think that I've ever met a more interesting person. I can see that you're a little sensitive about this thing about you, but, ... well, I won't pry -- though I'd love to maybe find out as I got to know you, but that's alright. I'm just nosy and it doesn't matter that much to me."

Sam's phone rang again and after answering it, she handed it to Siobhan, "It's your mom."

Siobhan talked for a minute and then she handed the phone back, "We've got to go to the main house, Mom said that they're at the old house where your Dad lives and we're supposed to go there, but she asked if I could get in and look after the horses for the night first. They're working to get his driveway opened up."

Sam looked over, "What does that mean?"

Siobhan shrugged, "There's this guy who works for the township and drives one of the big snowplows every winter. Pretty much everybody hates him for the way that he plows them in, like it's his mission in life or something. That's what's happened there and they're getting the driveway cleared. She wants us to look in on the horses and get them watered and fed, but she's kind of thinking that our driveway will be in the same shape. I told her that we'd handle it.

You ought to slow down here. Our left turn is just over the hill."

Sam nodded and eased up to begin downshifting gently. She was also about to ask how they were supposed to do what Sylvia had asked exactly, when they crested the rise and saw the police cruiser sitting across the road entrance where they needed to go. They pulled up and stopped as the officer walked over to tell them that the road was closed due to the weather.

"Fuck," Sam muttered under her breath, "This is where I regret not leaving the attitude at home. A little cuteness right now would work better. He's gonna take one look at me and then we'll have to use some other road up."

She rolled down her window and they prepared to get the news. Just as Sam was preparing to hear that the road was closed and then immediately try to convince the constable that her truck could get them in, Siobhan listened to the chatter on the radio which the officer was wearing for a few seconds.

The constable's eyes registered surprise and he leaned in only long enough to determine that there was no smell of alcohol inside the cab. He still looked confused and just said, "You're fine. Carry on," Before he walked back to his car. Sam backed up to give him room and they were alone a few seconds later as the cruiser carefully accelerated back the way that they'd come.

"What the hell got into him?" Sam asked as she turned, "He looked like he forgot what he wanted to say." She began to smile after a second and it turned into a grin.

Siobhan sat there looking at her with a strange smile, her hair hiding just a little of her face, but it was the little smile that she saw there along with the expression in her eyes that Sam saw which caused her to grin. Siobhan's expression changed then, back to the way that she'd looked for most of the trip -- pleasant and interested.

Sam laughed a little as she put the truck into gear and they began to drive up the slope slowly in four wheel drive. Siobhan watched her as she reached to turn on the lights up on the roof. They lit up a lot of the blowing snow, but if you looked carefully, they offered a slightly better view because they were so high up.

"I'm not even going to ask," Sam grinned at the windshield, "Right now, I don't fucking want to know what the hell just happened there, but I'm not dumb enough to stick around. I want us to be long gone before he comes back."

"Well he didn't actually SAY that the road was closed, did he?" Siobhan asked in a small voice.

"No," Sam nodded, not taking her eyes off the snow-covered road ahead, "I never heard him say that. He just mumbled something about the bad weather and then he looked a little shook up. You saw that too, right? You didn't hear him say anything about the road being closed, did you?"

Siobhan looked at Sam's profile and decided just to say it the way that Sam would have, "Fuck no."

Sam's head snapped around and they laughed for a second or two. "We can get through this, right?" Siobhan asked and she saw Sam nod slowly, "A walk in the park."

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"Ok," Sam said fifteen minutes later, "this," she said as she looked at the wall of snow blocking their path in to the farm from the road, "this is something that I can't handle. What do we do now, try to walk in and find a snow shovel or two and come back to dig?"

"No," Siobhan laughed, "that's Plan B, but we do have to walk in, so let me out and back up a little so that you're as far off the road as you can get against the snow on the shoulder. Then lock it and follow me."

Sam looked at the horses appreciatively as they saw to them. There weren't all that many, since Sylvia wasn't ready to begin boarding horses just yet. "Do you ride?" Siobhan asked, and Sam nodded, "Some, but I'm not an equestrian in any way. First of all, I don't own a horse, so I just ride a little when I get the chance. You?"

"Not lately," Siobhan said, "but around here, I think we'll both get a chance now and then. I think that would be fun."

Between the two of them, they had the horses dealt with in little time, though Sam kept wondering about the driveway. Finally, she asked.

"That's the part that we do now," Siobhan said as she led Sam into the driving shed, scooping a set of keys from where they hung near the doorway.

She walked over to a large front-end loader and opened the door to get in, "Shut the door after I'm out, Sam, there's a little room up here so I'll wait for you."

Siobhan had the diesel cranked and clattering noisily in no time, and a minute later, Siobhan pulled out into the snowy evening and waited. When Sam had the doors closed, she climbed up carefully and got inside the cab.

"You can drive this?" she asked and Siobhan nodded as they began to roll. Sam sat in wonder for the most part as Siobhan ploughed a quick path to the end of the driveway and then began to deal with the wall which had been left by the passage of the road plow.

"Bring your truck to the big shed, and I'll be there in a couple of minutes," Siobhan said, but Sam asked how they were going to get to where their parents were.

"Depends," Siobhan smiled, "on how much trouble I have getting one of the snowmobiles in the shed started."

Sam pulled out her phone and learned that Cale's driveway was cleared and passable. When Siobhan looked over, Sam shrugged, "Why bother? My truck's warm. Is there somewhere that I can wash off this makeup? I don't want to look this way when I meet my Dad and your Mom."

"Sure," Siobhan smiled and led the way, but she stopped still in her tracks when she saw a vaguely familiar dark shape out be the main yard fence.

"What is it?" Sam asked and Siobhan pointed, "I've never seen one this close."

"What the fuck is that?" she heard Sam whisper, "That's not a wolf, I don't think. I've never heard of a wolf getting to that size."

As they watched, the shape turned and sprang over the fence to lope away into the darkness. "Come on," Siobhan said as the spell was broken, "It's nothing bad, just a shadow that stays near to my family. I'll tell you about it sometime."

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On the way over, Siobhan noticed that Sam had fallen silent and she asked if there was anything wrong.

"No," she sighed, "I'm just scared shitless. I don't know your mom, but I know that I can like her just from talking to her on the phone."

"You're nervous about seeing your dad?" Siobhan asked and Sam nodded, "I feel like I'm going to be judged somehow. If it was anybody else, I wouldn't give a shit, but ... I think that a parent is supposed to guide their kid, and we didn't really have that. Well now I'm grown up." She looked out of the windshield into the darkness, "What's done is done, I guess."

Siobhan decided that it was her turn to reach for Sam's arm, "Hey, you just said it. What's done is done. He has to think about it the same way, Sam. Look, my Mom's in love with him, and if I know her at all -- and we're very close -- it's by her free will and choice this time. To me, that means that he can't be an asshole. And you're overlooking something important, I think.

From the things that you said about him, I'd think that he feels the same way and he probably judges himself a lot more harshly than he could judge you. You're the result of what he didn't get to teach, but if he sees a failing, I'd bet he'd blame himself before he'd blame you."

Sam looked over with her worried look fading a little to be replaced with a small smile. "Thank you. For somebody who'd have wanted to be a little shit, that's pretty deep."

Siobhan pointed to where they had to turn in and after a couple of moments where Sam seemed to need to gather something up in her, they walked to the porch. Cale met them at the door and things seemed to shift into a slightly different plane for Sam then. She saw Siobhan hugging her mother and though they looked a little different between them, it was obvious that they were mother and daughter. The introductions had been made before Sam really had any time to take everything in, and the next thing that she knew she was standing before her father as they looked at each other.