tagHumor & SatireA Romantic Tail Ch. 01

A Romantic Tail Ch. 01

byMissBri©

Dear readers,

No Lit rules were violated in the posting of these e-mails. There is lots of laughter, a little romance, perhaps a little love, but no sex, doggie-style or otherwise.

You will find alternating chapters posted by lilredjammies (Littlefoot's pack leader) and MistressJett (Dharma's mom). Each email within a chapter is written by the appropriate human.

Thanks in advance for reading!

Licks,
Jett n' Jammies


*


Date: May 19, 2006, 19:51 EST
From: Littlefoot96@liTTerotica.com
Subject: Hi
To: DharmaB1tch@liTTerotica.com

Dear DharmaB1tch,

Hi! You don't know me, but your pack leader, MistressJett, visited our pack this past weekend. She spent a lot of time petting me and my big brother, Bigfoot, and talking about how she missed you and your brother. MJ mentioned that you had a profile on liTTerotica.com, so when my pack leader, Jammies, was sleeping, I snuck into the study and looked at your profile.

Wow! You are SO hot! Your fur is very shiny, and looks incredibly soft. It makes me wonder what kind of shampoo you use. From your picture, you seem to still have all your teeth, which is always sexy in a bitch, and your ears are really pointy.

There is lots more information in my profile on liTTerotica, but I live with my pack leader, Jammies, and my big brother, Bigfoot. We have a lovely warm den that doesn't leak or anything, and I'm allowed to live inside and even sleep on the bed with Jammies sometimes! She is a very good pack leader, except that sometimes she doesn't understand that a guy just needs to lick himself, you know?

Wrestling with Bigfoot is fun, and I'm pretty good at growling, although he's better. I love pig ears, Kong ™ toys, long walks, garlic treats, squirrel-chasing, bird-watching, kibble, fleecy toys, squeaky toys and water in my bowl. I hate water outside of my bowl, like puddles, rain, BATHS and big booms in the sky. I really really hate being brushed and having my nails clipped, but I let Jammies do that 'cos it makes me look handsome, and I do like to keep my fur fluffy. Plus, she gives me cookies when I sit still, and how can you not like that?

I know you've never heard of me, and you don't know me from Adam's dog, but pretty please write me back and tell me all about you, Dharma.

Sincerely,

Littlefoot

* * *


Date: May 23, 2006, 17:26 EST
From: DharmaB1tch@liTTerotica.com
Subject: Re: Hi
To: Littlefoot96@liTTerotica.com

Hi Littlefoot,

I have to admit I was very surprised to hear from you. Yours was my first response from my profile on LiTTerotica, and I sure didn't think it would be from someone who had met my mom. That's who you mean, right? She's a short person, at least compared to the man we live with. And she's got tattoos and rings through her body parts. I don't know how she got them, but I live with a cat who has a small tattoo, and he said it hurts. I'm sure piercings would, too.

Anyhow, I think she's who you mean when you say pack leader. She and the man we live with always called each other Mom and Dad when they were speaking to us. I live with my brother Zeus – he's part wolf and we weren't littermates, either, but Dad adopted me shortly before Mom moved here, and a year or so later we brought Zeus home. He's a bit of a pest sometimes, since he's only 3½ years old and he has so much energy – I'm 5 and I can barely keep up with him. I'm strong, though, and fast. I usually end up kicking his butt all over the place and then humping him just to show him who's boss. He's the baby, and I can't let him forget that. Being bigger than me doesn't make him any better, y'know?

We have two cats, too. Sometimes Zeus helps out when the people are leaving the house and cats try to run outside – they'll toss one of them into the middle of the room, and Zeus will catch the cat. He'll hold it down with a paw and lick its head for hours if it doesn't manage to get away. The cats don't seem to mind so much, although they always run off to the corner and take a bath after Zeus has been licking them. Snobs.

Ok, so I actually like the cats for the most part. Tiger came to live with us shortly after Mom moved here. He was so tiny, and I was so excited to meet him after only living with people for months that I sort of scared him. I just couldn't stop sniffing him. Cat butt's like the world's finest newspaper when you haven't left your neighborhood or met any other four-legged animals in a while. I'm sure you know what I mean.

The other cat is only two years old, and he came to live with us about a year and a half ago. Dad doesn't like him very much, but he's ok. His name's Frank. He really misses Mom a lot since she left – actually, we all do. But everyone else is so bummed out, and I'm the oldest so I'm trying to set a good example while they're all destructive and getting yelled at by Dad.

Ugh, just look at me rambling on and on here!

I have to hurry up and go before Dad gets back from his shower, but I'll write more soon.

Licks,
Dharma

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