A Slave to the Servants Ch. 32

Despite the chill in the air the afternoon work was hot and dirty, but enlightening. Rose and I were small and closer to the ground than the men. They thanked us heartily for helping them pull the unwanted weeds from around their plants.

The field we were in today was growing something that seemed familiar. It looked an awful like corn, but Arik called it spota. It was something Rose and I could eat. As we pulled weeds the men told us about where it grew wild and how to prepare it. It was a staple in this part of the world.

The men were friendly enough until they got on the topic of slavers. Men like that had no right in their camp. Even if they had been male breeders for Hannah and Kennedy, they still were horrible creatures. Slavers should be left at the compounds to rot was the general opinion.

It took courage, but I finally said something.

"That isn't fair," I said firmly to the man picking the sporta off the stalk next to me. "Our families have changed. They know they made a mistake, now, you can't judge like that without giving them a chance."

"Slavers," the man said pulling off another mature piece of the plant, "have an entirely different way of viewing the world. They do not know respect for other living creatures. We do not want them here."

Rose spoke in an almost begging tone while looking at the ground, "Then you need to teach them," she said. "If you don't like how they view the world, you must be patient and teach them."

The men grumbled and fussed. Slavers weren't worth teaching, they were poisonous and evil. Just look at how Rose was acting, slavers had made her that way. She was scared and shy, still staring at the ground. The free men around us did not understand why men on the compounds kept slaves or why we were defending them.

Both Rose and I worked hard to change our behavior as the afternoon went on. Continuing to act as we'd been trained to would only hurt our families. We had to start acting like free women again.

After a day in the field Rose and I were both dirty and sweaty. The bathing pot in our rooms was small and we had really liked the warm bath that morning. Before the evening meal we went back to the bathing place and washed ourselves and our clothing.

It was a good thing I was accustomed to being naked. I had to strip off my outfit and wash it before getting into the water to bathe my body. It had been a long time since I felt self-conscious without clothing. After being dressed all day, I found my bare skin made me shy. Still, I was determined not to cower in our rooms with Rose.

Arik's family and Ratru's family ate with us again that night. Rose and I were getting used to the new families and even relaxed enough to laugh at their jokes. It wasn't the same closeness I was used to with Damien's family, but it was nice.

One of the families I rescued from the caves, the same one that brought Kennedy's pad to me, even showed up and sat at our table. We all squeezed together so they would fit. I got the feeling the men liked to be this close to one another. It was different from the almost isolation the families at the compound were used to.

The lead Brother's name in this family was Rayn. It was easy to recognize his family because of the one tall Brother. Rayn had pulled up chairs so his family could take a meal with all of us. He and his Brothers worked almost exclusively with rescues from the compounds or exploration of the surrounding area. They were rarely in the camp.

"We like to be outside," Rayn said between large bites. "Some men like the safety of the camp, but we find it confining. My Brothers and I want to be out in the world."

I smiled at him and nodded. He and his Brothers looked like the most rugged men I'd seen here. Listening to their stories it sounded like they had seen a great deal. Had we been on Earth, I imagined they would be explorers living on the edge of civilization.

Rayn's family had even brought back a bag of seeds for Arik and his Brothers. It was a fruit the men had difficulty cultivating here, but they all liked it. Rayn and his family were positive Arik's family could figure out how to grow it this time, though. Although Arik's family was obviously physically weaker than Rayn's they were well respected for what they did.

I watched the men interact and noted that Hannah had been right. Free men believed strongly in equality. Rayn's family didn't shun Arik's because they were smaller. There were things Rayn just wasn't good at and he could acknowledge that.

Thinking back I realized the compound had been divided in a very physical sense. Shopkeepers behind one wall and Warriors behind another. Even the Administrators kept closely to themselves. None of the groups mingled the way I saw them purposefully doing here.

Our meal finished and we were left to go back to our lodgings on our own. I walked with my friend through the camp and found myself wondering about Damien and his Brothers.

"You know," Rose said quietly as we walked, "I bet if we get up early again, we would see our families in the morning."

She was right and it quickly became an addictive pattern. Rose and I met our families almost every morning in the bathing hall. It was deserted that time of day so no one noticed what we were doing.

We never had long with them and there was always the threat someone would come in. It was just a few stolen moments everyday to say I love you and check on each other. I wanted more, so much more, but it just was not possible for us to be together.

Our men were fairly happy in the camp, but very isolated. They were not invited to dine with everyone and they were not included in group activities. If it hadn't been for Arnold's family and Tyle's family they would have been very lost.

Our men were essentially left on their own. They had to catch and cook their own food. They had their jobs and they usually took them far from the camp. I know some part of them missed the camaraderie of the compound, but they made do. Instead of complaining they used the free time to explore and learn. Nobody limited them and they adored the freedom.

Our men were usually given the worst jobs and the most dangerous. None of them ever complained about that either. Instead they were becoming the toughest men in the entire camp. Damien told us they saw things and places the other men rarely did, due to the danger. That was fine, because they had new experiences everyday.

The only thing they ever complained about, the only sadness that seemed to touch them, was the loss of Jonathan. Evan mourned for his lost child just as I did. He could sense the boy and knew he was alive. All our other information came from the black and white pictures we watched from time to time.

Jonathan was a fierce little boy and so was his family. They fought each other to get stronger and fought other little boys to prove dominance. Everything seemed to interest them.

I noted that Jonathan's curiosity got him and his Brothers in loads of trouble. He wanted to know everything. I cried each time I went to watch the monitor. Tears poured for the little man I would not know any more than this. Evan told me he felt the same as I did when he watched our raucous child.

Our men's opinions regarding Rose and me changed slowly. I knew that Hannah and Kennedy talked to them frequently when they were here. Gunth counseled them, also. My family made comments to me and I knew they were being educated. It was just a very slow process for them to change their thinking. They couldn't believe we didn't need their protection.

The main issue was that Rose and I associated with other men all day. Our families weren't sure they liked the way we lived our lives. We talked to them about the friendly men we talked to and worked with. Men in the camp taught us things and we told them about Earth culture or knitted them blankets. The continued little interactions concerned our men. One day they'd finally had enough of it.

"Hannah can bring food to your rooms," Damien said. He'd had a bad day prior and his irritation won out. "You cannot move around these men as though there is no danger! It isn't safe."

"It is perfectly safe," I argued soaping my arm. "No one here would touch us if we didn't want them to. They won't act like the men you are used to. These men respect our choices."

Bane cursed a foul stream and Basin seconded it. Rose and I were weak and defenseless. We'd be taken advantage of soon enough. We were just too stupid to see the signs. Without our families we were just a warm place to put a cock. The men couldn't believe it had not happened already.

I liked Armant's family and Arik's family. Ratru's family was always eager to help us learn to use weapons. Rayn and his Brothers, when they were in camp, told us about the wild world outside. They'd been many places. For the first time in who knew how long I had friends I had chosen. Damien's attitude infuriated me.

"They have never taken my body after I said no," I said grabbing Rose and heading for the exit of the bath. "They've never beaten me. I believe I have more to fear in here than I do out there!" I finished gesturing to the cave entrance.

Damien looked shocked.

"And you, Rose," Basin growled, "you enjoy your time with these other men? Do they provide for you?"

Rose stiffened her spine and was suddenly pulling me up the steps and out of the water.

"They have asked me for nothing," she said simply, "in return for granting my total freedom. I provide clothing for them because I chose to and that simple price has afforded me the entirety of what you and your Brothers denied me. Yes, Basin, they provide for me."

The men were now all livid as we grabbed our clothes and ran for the entrance to the cave. I knew they could catch us in an instant. We could be beaten to death before we could raise a hand in self defense. Terror rose in my gut and it didn't relax until we were at the exit to the bathing cave.

Just before exiting the darkened cave, Rose and I pulled our outfits over damp skin with shaking hands. The things we'd said had been true and brutal. I wondered if the men would forgive us. I wondered if they would try to punish us for saying those things.

We made our way slowly up to our rooms and sat in front of the fire as we shivered.

"I don't know what made me say that to them," Rose whispered suddenly. "I don't understand how I feel. Basin and his Brothers have been my whole world for so long..."

I stared at the fire and thought about the way I'd felt in the cave. My heart had been pounding out of my chest and I had been shaking like a leaf. I'd been afraid, terrified of the pain they knew how to inflict.

"They beat me," I said slowly, "when they found out I told you about Hannah..."

Rose nodded and hugged herself.

"I thought they would have," she said quietly. "The things the men from the red mountains taught them were evil."

"Just now," I said glancing at our covered door, "I was fearful they would hurt me again, because they could."

Rose straightened in her chair and her mouth took on a firm line.

"They won't hurt us. They wouldn't dare, but we don't go back," she said stoically, "until we don't fear them. They like seeing us and enjoy talking to us. Our presence in that bathing hall is a choice everyday. Let them see how they like it when we do what we want, without thinking about what they want."

It took three days for us to walk into the bathing hall in the morning. I spent all three days getting angrier and angrier at Damien and his Brothers. When Rose and I finally returned one morning the men were in the water bathing quietly. Rose and I stripped and stepped into the water and cleaned our own bodies carefully.

"Hannah and Kennedy talk to us," Damien said standing several paces away from me. "They tell us that you have made friends and that the men respect you both."

"They do," I answered quietly as I rubbed the cloth over my own shoulders. "The men here have never beaten me or raped me."

The men were silent and I heard Basin and Stayne's family moving away. Even Rose offered some privacy, by stepping away.

"We have apologized," Damien said softly, "for our prior actions."

Fire boiled in my veins and I felt the anger I had long denied.

"You beat me between my legs," I told them in a low voice. "You gave me such pain I had nightmares about it. I trusted you with everything and you treated me like that. I couldn't even be angry at you! Where would I have gone and what would I have done if you abandoned me?!"

My voice was ringing in the cave now and I saw the shock on the faces of the men.

"After you did that horrible thing to me I had to smile and accept your cocks there as if nothing had happened! It was obvious I could not fight you and you made our relationship clear. I was never anything but a slave to you!"

The room was still for a moment before Damien spoke, but I didn't wait. I stormed out of the water with Rose hot on my heels.

"We felt fear, Sister," Damien pleaded to my retreating back.. "We acted out of terror that the women would take you. None of us wanted to do that, but we knew you had to learn."

"THEY DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE!" I screamed at him standing on the steps and facing them. "THEY NEVER SAID A WORD TO ANY OF US ABOUT IT! YOU BEAT ME BECAUSE YOU COULD!"

Christof spoke softly and quickly as I grabbed my clothes off the line. "We did not know that would happen. We thought they would be angry. My Brothers and I were foolish and acted out of fear. Please forgive us, Sister."

"And then you BRED me like a dog," I seethed pulling my wet garments over my half cleaned body. "You forced me to birth a son I will never know. Nu-reeh may not have even gotten another child from me before we left, but you all made it happen..."

"It was a stupid mistake, Sister," Evan begged. "We wanted to protect you-"

The anger rose and I threw a bar of soap at him hitting his shoulder. "YOU HAVE NEVER PROTECTED ME!" I shouted with righteous fury. "You men have beaten and controlled me from the first day you met me! I mean nothing to you! You do not understand family!"

I stormed out of the cave alone and went back to the small room I shared with my friend. I was so angry. My fists were bloody from hitting the wall when I finally stopped that. Instead I sat on the bed and looked at Jonathan's picture. For the first time in a very long time I allowed the anger and frustration out. Time had no meaning as I railed against the unfairness of it all.

I was as good as dead to my Earth family and I'd never see them again. My daughters were grown and gone. I was unable to raise my precious boy. The men I thought I had loved, I'd been tricked into caring for. Nothing seemed real anymore. On this world and in this life I had absolutely nothing.

It became a cycle. I'd sob for a while watching Jonathan's picture and then scream into my pillow until I was hoarse. Rose appeared at some point, but I ignored her until she left. I just continued with my raving until I was too weak to do anything save stare at my young son's face.

"Mama," Kennedy said softly, "come out and talk to us."

"No," I rasped not taking my eyes off Jonathan's image.

"It's time, Mama," Kennedy said softly. "Come out and talk to us. You've held this in for too long."

Much against my wishes I dragged myself into the sitting area around the fire. Kennedy and her Sisters had arranged themselves and sat cross legged on the floor. They were there for the long haul, so to speak.

Kennedy and her Sisters were wise beyond their years. They said they'd been waiting, very patiently, for me to become angry. I had a right to be mad, they told me, Rose had the same right. We'd held our feelings inside and denied them long enough. The loving relationships we had with our families were based in a very dark place. We had to accept the whole truth and we'd never done that.

I talked to the girls all day. Rose came back and after some prodding, she did the same things I'd done that morning. We both slowly came to terms with the way we felt and it made no sense.

My body felt horrible and raw. My mind was in turmoil and I wanted two very different things. I wanted Damien and his Brothers to comfort me. At the same time I wanted to hurt them as badly as I could. If I could have I would have beaten them all to a bloody pulp and felt vindicated doing it. It was very confusing.

I did not like discussing this with Kennedy one bit, but she seemed not bothered by my ambivalence about her father. She knew me at my most intimate level and I suppose the questions had always been there. Evidently she'd come to terms with it long ago.

The next day I went to work with Armant and I helped in the fields, but I didn't meet Damien and his Brothers in the morning. For days I thought about how I felt and it never got any clearer. I had a choice now, I realized. Damien and his Brothers weren't the only men on this planet.

I sought out men that looked attractive to me. At night I had dinner with different families and even flirted with some. We'd go back to their rooms and talk a little. I just couldn't find a connection with any of them. It just felt like friendship.

Thinking about my own sexual needs started to make me frustrated. I wanted relief, but I was having trouble finding men to provide it. In the middle of the night I'd find myself curled in a chair as Rose slept in the bed. It was hard to sleep when I was this horny.

My memories were filled with arousing images. As angry as I was at Damien and his Brothers, they were magnificent looking men. Inadvertently I began to remember times I'd seen them wet with sweat and seeking release between my thighs. I tried to imagine other men and always ended up focusing back on the bodies I knew so well.

Evan's chest as it tapered down to his flat stomach and long, thick cock. Damien's powerful arms with his hands gliding possessively over my skin. Kein's mouth nearly making me orgasm as he nibbled at my sensitive nipples.

As I sat by the fire I felt Christof's long fingers gliding up my thighs. I recalled the first time he'd experimented with using his mouth on my center. The tentative strokes of his tongue had grown bolder as he'd seen my passion rise. He could own the wetness between my legs when he wanted to.

Last but not least was Bane. He had an insatiable fascination with the tight puckered flesh of my ass. How many times had I looked back to see his massive form poised, ready to impale me? Big hands separating my flesh as his chest heaved with the effort of holding back. It always hurt a little when he started, but my resistance always faded as he slowly stretched me.

The sturdy linen dress I wore at night became too much on my sensitive skin. Glancing furtively back at Rose's form sleeping in our bed, I slipped the offending fabric off.

There were times I'd masturbated for Damien and his Brothers. It was not something I did because I wanted to. This had been like everything else sexual, their choice to see me do it. There was just me here right now, though.

Now as I sat I stroked the round, fullness of my breasts. My nipples stiffened in the air and I pinched them hard. The slight pain felt good and I did it again. Biting back a moan, I remembered the lash Damien had wielded. I imagined the stinging little slaps warming the pendulous flesh. There was no fear of abuse anymore and I only recalled the pleasure.

My hands drifted lower and I spread my legs. The flesh of my stomach felt soft and feminine under my fingertips. I reached the tops of my thighs and slowly traced down to my knees. As I dragged my fingers back up goosebumps spread up my body.

It had been so long since I had done this. There was no one here except me and I was doing it for me. I wanted to orgasm, because it would feel good, not as a show for anyone else. My breath rushed out as my fingers slid over my plump lower lips.