A Therapist's Opinion

Ethan ran his fingers through his wet hair, pulled the equipment bag full of hockey gear over his shoulder, and headed for the locker room door. A twinge of pain shot up his leg from his knee. He paused a moment, wincing, and hoped none of the other guys noticed his limp.

"Hey Ethan, wait up," Darien shouted from behind.

Ethan stopped at the door. Darien slammed his locker and rushed to catch up, carrying his own equipment bag.

"You need a ride home?" Darien said. "Maria's gonna meet me here. We're going out tonight. We can drop you off if you want."

"Sure. That'd be great," Ethan said. "I got a lot of homework to do, anyway."

"That's cool."

They walked together down the hall. Maria was waiting in the parking lot by Darien's car with Iris and another guy. He sat behind the wheel of a hot looking '69 Mustang and Iris sat on the hood, kicking her legs.

Ethan felt himself stir instantly. She was wearing snug jeans and black leather boots with the really tall heels, and a tight white t-shirt with red bands around the collar and short sleeves. The print on the front of the t-shirt, a picture of some band he never heard of, was stretched out of shape over her big boobs.

"Oh great," Darien said. Maria waved and he waved back.

"What?"

"Iris' fag brother's here. I don't need to talk to him."

Ethan looked closer at the guy in the Mustang.

"That's her brother? Charlie, right?" Ethan said.

Maria walked toward them. She wore a short blouse with her midriff exposed and a pair of khaki shorts. Her hips swung side to side, her breasts bounced under the blouse, and the light, cool breeze blew her long, dark hair across her face.

"Hi baby," she said, smiling at Darien, and whisked the wild strands of hair from her face with her long fingernail. She rose on the balls of her feet and kissed him.

"What's the fag doing here?" Darien said.

Maria frowned. "Darien, you're so mean. He was nice to drop us off."

"He's still a disgusting fag and I ain't talking to him."

"He's got a nice car," Ethan said.

"You would say that," Darien said.

Ethan walked on. Iris was pulling on her bubblegum, twisting it like a string around her finger. She watched him, smiling.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi."

Ethan's mind blanked. He struggled to come up with something to say. Her big breasts seemed to beg to him to reach out and squeeze them. He realized he was staring and turned his eyes down to her feet.

"Nice shoes," he said.

Iris smirked. "Thanks." She hopped off the car and walked across the parking lot to join Maria and Darien.

The engine in the Mustang revved. Ethan looked at Charlie, sitting in the driver's seat with his hand on the top arc of the steering wheel. He put the car in gear and started to roll away, staring back. Ethan's eyes narrowed. Charlie looked normal, just like any other guy. Could he figure out if a guy was gay just by looking at him? What did it mean to be gay, anyway?

Ethan sat in the back of Darien's car with Iris. She hardly said a word to him the entire way, hardly even looked at him. His heart felt like it was crushed in his chest. They dropped him off in front of his house with his equipment bag and took off, the blaring radio echoing between houses.

He went inside and up the stairs. The door to Pam's room was open. He heard someone giggling from inside and peeked in. He stopped in his tracks. Pam was with that Debbie chick in her room. Pam was in her bikini, and she looked hot.

"Hi Ethan," Pam said, and waved.

Debbie turned around. Her eyes swept up from his feet to his face and she smiled.

"Hi," she said.

Ethan blushed. "Hi," he said with a quick wave, and ducked into his room.

He dumped his equipment bag on his bed. Debbie was pretty hot. He wouldn't mind going to bed with her. He peeled off his shirt, threw it in the corner, and rifled through his dresser. What he didn't understand was why Pam hung out with her. Everyone in school knew Debbie Holtz was just a slut. Pam wasn't a slut. She should hang out with someone nice, someone like herself. He slammed the dresser shut. Where the hell were his good jeans?

Mom called from downstairs. Ethan went to the head of the stairs and leaned on the railing, staying out of view of Pam's room.

"Yeah?" he said.

Mom held up his jeans. "Come down here, please."

Ethan plodded down the stairs.

"You found my jeans?" he said.

"I was washing your clothes." She reached into the pocket and pulled out a black piece of fabric. "Where did these come from?"

Ethan's eyes grew wide. It was Iris' lacy black panties. Mom dangled them in her fingers. He cleared his throat and tried to think of something to say, but all that came out was a nervous stammer. Mom sighed. Her arms dropped to her sides and she shook her head.

"I can't believe you're having sex, too. You're only nineteen." She touched his cheek. "I guess I should have expected it, though. You've grown up so fast and you're so handsome, just like your father."

"Mom ..." he said in a whiny tone.

She shoved his jeans into his hands.

"The last thing I need is for you to get a girl pregnant. Get dressed. We're going to the drug store to get you some condoms."

"Jeez, Mom ..."

"Do it."

He went back upstairs and got dressed. Mom was waiting for him by the front door with her keys in her hand. The car was quiet and tense for the short drive up to the drug store. She dragged him in and down the aisles to the back, where the boxes of condoms hung on hooks. Ethan's face burned. He kept his head down, hoping no one he knew saw him buying condoms with his Mom.

She put her hands on her hips and sighed.

"I know this makes you uncomfortable, Ethan, but I have to ask. How big are you?"

"Excuse me?"

"How big are you?" She lowered her voice. "I mean your ... penis. How long is it?"

He looked down at his crotch. "Uh, I don't know," he said. Mr. Thorn said it was twelve inches long. Should he tell that to his own Mom?

She selected a box from the rack. "I better get extra large for you. Your father was, well, pretty large himself. He once told me all the McCullen men were bigger than normal. I'm sure you'll be no different."

Ethan stayed a step behind her at the counter while she bought the condoms. The woman behind the cash register took Mom's money, put the box of condoms in a bag, and smiled at Ethan as they walked out. His face burned again. He walked in a hurry to the car. Mom dumped the bag in his lap, started the car, put it in gear, then put it back in park.

"Do you know how to use those?" she said, with a nod to the bag in his lap.

Ethan looked down at it. The paper bag crinkled. He stayed very still, afraid to move, as if it was some radioactive device.

"Uh, not really," he said.

Mom's hands held the steering wheel, her fingers drumming on the rim. She let out another deep sigh.

"Ok, I'm gonna show you, but you have to promise me you'll use them, ok?"

"Uh, ok, I guess," Ethan said.

Mom snatched the bag from his lap, removed the box and ripped it open.

"It's really pretty simple. You have to do this before you actually ... actually have sex, you understand?"

Ethan shook his head.

"Ok, well, let's say you're out with a girl and you like her and you both decide that ... that you're gonna have sex, ok?"

"Ok," Ethan said. He imagined himself with Iris, and in his mind saw her bare ass when she pulled up the back of her cheerleader uniform and bent over his lap. His penis stirred in his jeans and he put his hand over his lap.

Mom swallowed and cleared her throat. She held up a small red packet from the box.

"What you have to do is put one of these over your ... penis before you, well, put it in the girl. Got that?"

"Yeah, sure Mom, whatever," Ethan said. The memory of Iris lowering herself on his dick made him hard and he squirmed in the seat.

Mom tore the packet open and pulled out a rubber ring. She held up her hand with two fingers raised.

"All you do is put the condom over the end of your penis, like this, and roll it all the way down. Easy, see?"

She rolled the condom over her fingers and smiled, like a magician revealing a secret trick. She took it off and handed him a second packet.

"Now you try it," she said.

Ethan's hands shook as he took the red packet and tore it open. Mom held her hand up again with her fingers raised. He fumbled with the soft, rubber ring, dropped it twice, and tore it on her fingernail.

"You're gonna need some practice," she said.

"Mom, why do I have to do this?" he said.

"I told you, so you don't get a girl pregnant. You don't want that, do you?"

"I guess not."

"Of course you don't," Mom said. Her hand touched his. Her eyes glanced at his lap. She took her hand away from his, looked around the parking lot, and turned on her hip to face him. "Ok, Ethan, I want you to pull down your pants."

"Mom, what?" He covered his lap and squeezed his legs together.

"I know you're pretty aroused right now, son. There's only one way you're gonna learn how to use these, and I'm gonna show you. So take those pants off right now, Mister."

"Ok Mom, jeez, take it easy," Ethan said.

His hands trembled as he unfastened his belt. He swallowed hard. Mom was watching his hands. He pushed his jeans down to his knees. His hard dick pushed up the front of his boxer shorts. Mom's eyes grew wide. He pushed the shorts down. It popped up like a child's toy and he forced it down with both hands.

"Don't be embarrassed, Ethan. Let me see it," Mom said, and pulled his hand away.

He let go and it stuck up. He turned his face to the window, afraid to look at his own mother.

"My goodness, Ethan. You're a lot bigger than your father was." She looked at the red packet. "I don't know if this is gonna fit."

Ethan groaned. "Mom, do we have to do this?"

"Yes. You don't have a choice. Now, I want you to pay attention." She tore the package open. "Just put the condom over the end of your penis like this, and roll it down. Try to leave a little room at the tip for your, um, sperm."

She rolled the condom over his dick to the base. Ethan squeezed the door handle. The thin rubber was stretched tight. She closed her hand around the shaft and moved it up and down, wrinkling the rubber.

"It's so thick, Ethan, and so hard. I've never seen a penis this big, expect maybe your father's, of course. I should have guessed, though. I saw you that day at Mr. and Mrs. Thorn's house, when you were fixing that light. I saw the way this thing was sticking out in your swim shorts. It was because of Mrs. Thorn, wasn't it? I think she was dressed like that just to turn you on. Well, I guess it worked."

Ethan's eyes rolled shut. "Mom, that feels really good," he said, and moaned.

Mom's hand jerked away. She brushed her hair away from her forehead.

"I'm so sorry, Ethan. I can't believe I'm jerking off my own son."

"Mom, this thing feels weird," Ethan said. He put his hand around his dick and pumped slowly. "Would you do that again?"

She shook her head. "What have I done? Now I got you all worked up. I think I'm gonna need someone to help me with this before we get carried away. Pull your pants up."

Ethan squeezed his penis and squirmed.

"Mom, it hurts," he said.

"I know, and I'm real sorry. We'll do ... something about it. I just don't know what."

"Do I have to leave this on?" he said, pulling at the condom.

Mom smirked. "No dear, you can take it off."

He rolled the condom off and handed it to Mom. She dropped it in the bag. Ethan bent his erect penis to the side to slip it back into his underwear and jeans, and winced. Mom looked at his lap, shaking her head.

"My goodness, that thing's not easy to hide, is it?" she said.

"Not really."

The shape of his cock stuck out in the leg of his jeans like a thick steel pipe that stretched to his knee.

Her head shook slowly. "I'm surprised you actually found a girl who would let you put that inside her. You didn't hurt her, did you?"

"I don't think so."

"Really, I shouldn't be surprised. What woman wouldn't want a man built like you?" She sighed and started the car. "I guess that really is the problem, isn't it? I think I know someone who can help."

"Where are we going?"

"To see a friend of mine."

"Who?"

"Mrs. Murphy."

"You mean Cindy's Mom?" Ethan said.

"Yes. Why? Do you have a problem with that?"

"No. I mean yeah. I hate Cindy. She's such a brat."

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure she won't even be there," Mom said, and drove out of the parking lot.

* * * *

Mr. Pedersen opened the door of her office, turned back and smiled.

"Thank you again, Dr. Murphy. I think I'll enjoy these sessions," he said.

Linda Murphy got up from behind her desk and smiled back.

"I'm glad to hear that," she said.

She shook his hand in the doorway and followed him out to the reception area. From behind her desk, Martha looked up.

"Good night, Mr. Pedersen," she said with a polite smile.

"Good evening," he said.

He turned to Cindy, sitting on one of the chairs against the wall opposite Martha's desk. She was reading a magazine, slouched back with her feet up on the chair and her knees up. Her short skirt had slid all the way back, exposing her legs, the pink stockings that came up to her knees, and the crotch of her pink panties. Mr. Pedersen glanced at her panties as he continued out the front door. Linda frowned and crossed her arms. He was going to be more work than she thought.

"Sit up, Cindy," Linda said, spanking the side of her bare leg.

"Mom," she said with a whine, but her feet dropped to the floor and she sat up. She tugged at her skirt, but it only covered her legs to the middle of her thighs.

"Where's your father? I thought he was supposed to be here to pick you up by now," Linda said.

"I don't know," Cindy said, without looking up from the magazine.

Linda shook her head and turned to Martha.

"Martha, you can go home, if you like. Thank you for waiting," she said.

Martha shut off her computer and grabbed her purse.

"Thanks. I gotta get going. I invited a guy over for dinner. I just hope he comes."

"Good luck," Linda said as Martha went out. She looked at her watch. "Where is your father? He's late again, as usual."

Cindy just shrugged and turned a page. Linda sat in the chair next to Cindy and picked up another magazine. Out of the corner of her eye, she studied her daughter.

Cindy was still only seventeen, but she was growing so fast. Already, she was filling out and looked more like a young woman than a girl. It wouldn't be long before she got interested in boys, and that would be a big problem, because the way she was growing up, boys would have a lot of interest in her.

"What's new with you, Cindy?" Linda said. She flipped the pages of the magazine without reading anything.

Cindy shrugged. "Not much."

"Do you have any homework this weekend?"

"I did it already."

"I see. That's good. Do have plans to do anything with your friends?"

Cindy shook her head.

"Well, you should at least get outside while it's still nice."

"Whatever, Mom," Cindy said and rolled her eyes.

Linda opened her mouth to scold her daughter, but the front door opened and Anne came in with her son, Ethan.

"Anne, what a surprise," she said, and got up.

"Hi Linda. Hi Cindy," Anne said.

"Hi," Cindy said without looking up from the magazine. She glanced up once, and looked again when she saw Ethan.

Anne touched her arm and lowered her voice.

"Can I speak to you? In private?" she said, looking at Ethan out of the corner of her eye.

Linda's eyebrows rose.

"Sure. We can, uh, talk in my office, if you like," she said.

Anne smiled. "Ok. Ethan, stay here with Cindy, please."

Cindy dropped the magazine in her lap and sat up, grinning at Ethan. He stayed where he was by Martha's desk, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. Anne walked ahead into her office. Linda followed and closed the door.

"Anne, what's the problem?" Linda said.

Anne was wringing her hands. "I don't know how to say this. It's about Ethan."

"What about him?" Linda said. She pointed to one of the chairs in front of her desk and they both sat down.

"Well, you see ... I'm concerned about him," Anne said.

"I can see that. About what?"

"Well ... about him using ... safe sex."

"Oh, I see," Linda said.

Anne's hand reached across the space between the two chairs and touched her hand.

"Linda, you know about Pam. I've already had one child in trouble. I don't need another."

"I understand, I understand. What makes you think Ethan is sexually active?"

Anne opened her purse and pulled out lacy black panties.

"I found these in the pocket of his jeans today when I was washing clothes."

"Do you know whose those are?" Linda said, and took the panties.

"No. He didn't say. What if they belong to an older woman?" Anne said.

LInda opened her mouth to say they may not have even come from a woman when she smelled the odor from the panties. It was definitely the smell of an aroused woman. She handed the panties back.

"First of all, Anne, I just want to reassure you that his behavior is perfectly normal, although he is a bit young yet."

"Linda, Ethan's just a boy. He shouldn't be having sex at all," Anne said.

"Anne, he's over eighteen. He's hardly a boy. You may not be able to tell him not to. If he wants to, and his urges are strong, he's going to do what he wants," Linda said.

"Would you talk to him for me, please? I'll pay for your time."

"Don't worry about that, Anne. You're my friend. I can't take your money. But, what do you want me to do?"

Anne sighed. She looked down at her hands.

"Could you just talk to him? I know you're better at it than me. You see, I tried to talk to him, but I don't think I did it very well."

"What do you mean? What did you say?" Linda said.

Anne cleared her throat. "Well, you see, I took him to get some condoms, just to be safe, you know?"

"Yes?"

"Well, I had to show him how to use them."

"Yes," Linda said.

Anne's eyes avoided hers.

"Well, you see, I sort of touched his penis," Anne said.

Linda's eyebrows arched. "You touched your son's penis? When? Today?"

"Yes. Just a few minutes ago. We were in the car, you see, and I had to make sure he knew how to use the condom, so I made him take off his pants, and, well ..."

"Was Ethan aroused at the time?"

Anne's eyes grew wide. "Oh yes, he was very aroused. I was doing more than touching. I was jerking him off."

"Did he ... Did he ejaculate?"

"Oh no, I stopped before we got that far. But Linda, I'm ashamed to admit, I enjoyed it."

"Ok. It's all right. Don't be ashamed. It's only natural to enjoy it. I mean, he is a man, after all."

Anne chuckled. "He's a lot of man, too."

"A lot of man?"

"That boy," Anne said, shaking her head. "He takes after his father, there's no question of that."

"I don't understand," Linda said.

Anne leaned forward and lowered her voice, as if the children might hear through the door.

"His penis? It's huge. Good Lord, I've never seen anything as big as that, and his father was pretty big."

"Really?" Linda said, and sat back. She had to remember to be professional. She cleared her throat. "Anne, I'm afraid I have to ask a difficult question. Are you sure he's having sex with girls?"

Anne made a disgusted face. "What else would he be doing? What about the panties? Those are definitely from a girl."

"Anne, have you considered he might be gay, and having sex with other men?"

Anne covered her mouth with her hand. "God, I didn't even think of that. He could get AIDS. How can I find out? He'll deny it if I ask."

"Let me take care of it," Linda said, and patted Anne's hand.

"What are you gonna do?"