All at Sea

* * * * *

"You're early." I opened the stateroom door at her knock.

"Shall I come back later?" Aud turned to leave.

"Get in here." I caught her elbow and guided her through the door, closing and locking it behind her. She had a paper shopping bag with her and was wearing a simple frock. I pulled her to me for a kiss, determined to 'be the man' for at least the start of this adventure.

"Easy, Tiger." She eased her mouth away from mine. "Plenty of time for that later. First, we're going to test drive one of your fantasies. May I?" She pushed my groping hands down and went over to the small desk where my netbook lay. Turning the chair round, she beckoned me over. "Sit here."

I sat.

"We're going to play 'Who shaves the barber?'" Aud took a disposable razor and a bowl out of her bag and went into my bathroom.

"So what are we supposed to be testing?" I called through to her. "Whether I enjoy seeing you naked?"

"And whether it's really a turn-on to be naked in front of men." She replied, coming back into the stateroom in white stockings, no dress and tan lines. So there was someone in this day and age that didn't top up her tan on sun beds. Three pale triangles marked where her bikini had obviously always been.

"Well we've passed the first part. I can confirm I like what I see." I looked her up and down. Her breasts were every bit as perfect as I'd anticipated, her nipples raspberry pink and already clearly perky. Her pussy wasn't shaved, but the neat triangle of dark curls didn't hide much and if I stared hard, I could make out her dewy labia – so I stared hard as she advanced on me with a bowl of warm water. I was still staring when she stopped right in front of my face, set aside the bowl and straddled my lap.

"We should have a cape to hide that." She reached between us and stroked my prominent hard-on through my boxer shorts. "But I guess as long as you don't actually whip it out, I can ignore it for now."

I had no intention of moving it. Where she'd settled herself, my swollen tip was pinned between my thighs and her labia. Why would I move? "I'm entirely in your hands." I magnanimously allowed her to continue.

"First we'd better get your hair out of the way." She pulled the elastic band from its usual place around my wrist then leant forward so she could gather my hair into a ponytail. I have very long hair and usually wear it tied back, but I'd left it down after washing it earlier. Aud leant so far forward to be able to reach the back of my head that my face ended up pressed between her breasts. A nice touch, I thought, and one I hadn't included in the story. I made the most of the opportunity and inhaled deeply. She smelt wonderful. I would have nuzzled more actively, but that would be out of character for the fantasy she was re-enacting.

"That's better." She sat back to admire her handiwork. I glanced down to admire her. They really were very nice breasts: not so big that they'd sagged much over the years, but not small. A good handful each: And who could ask for more?

"They must have been spectacular when you were eighteen. They're pretty spectacular now." I do appreciate well-proportioned breasts.

"Thank you." She jiggled them and glanced down to check them out for herself. "But I think they're more useful now than they were back then." She tucked the handle of the razor under one tit and let go. It stayed put. "See? I couldn't do that when I was eighteen." She reached for the face cloth, dipped it in the bowl and damped my cheeks while I watched the razor sway but not fall.

When she lathered and shaved me, I had to look away from her a bit, which was a drawback, since the purpose of the exercise was to ogle her as much as possible. At least, that had been the premise of the service offered by Suzy in my original story.

"So?" I asked as she got off my lap and stretched her hands high over her head, almost touching the low ceiling of the cabin. Her breasts looked even better when her arms were up like that. I watched in blatant admiration, one hand stroking my cock through my shorts.

"See that damp patch?" Aud pointed at my shorts. "That means yes. It was a real turn on to be naked in front of you knowing you're not allowed to touch. If I did that several times a day, I'd get home gagging for it."

"So the test is over? I'm allowed to touch now?" I stood up, dropping my shorts and stepping out of them as I closed the gap between us. Aud melted against me, moaning into my mouth and grabbing two handfuls of my backside. I followed suit, kneading her bottom firmly. When we had to stop kissing or suffocate each other, she let go and pushed me gently away from her.

"Time for part two of the test."

"Part two?" I like games but I wanted to get laid… right now.

"Part two. What did Kimmie do to Suzy?"

"Licked her bottom." I'd already owned up to never having tried this, but like I said to Aud, it sure looks fun. I was up for it.

"Until Suzy came." Aud added. "There's a forfeit this time, Adam."

"What forfeit?" What was she up to now?

"Make me come and you get to shave the barber." She stroked her curls.

"And if you don't come?"

"I'll shave your pubes off. Deal?"

"Deal." What was I going to do? Turn down the chance to do something incredibly sexy and incredibly filthy because it might cost me my pubic hair. It'd grow back long before another girl asked me to rim her.

I peeled off my polo shirt while Aud knelt on the bed, her face on one of the pillows and her backside in the air. It was my first opportunity to really see her pussy: It glistened with moisture, her labia engorged and pink, nestled between her slim thighs. My balls throbbed and my cock twitched, eager to be buried in her soft flesh. Her anus was just the same shade of raspberry pink that surrounded her nipples. I shuffled onto the bed behind her and paused, my mouth inches from her flanks.

"Lick my arse, Adam." She asked with bizarre politeness, her upper class accent completely at odds with her words.

Not wanting to keep a lady waiting, I lowered my face and probed her anus with the tip of my tongue. Soap. That's what it tasted of: medicated soap. Still, it was nice to know that Aud took hygiene seriously. I worked my tongue in circles round and round her sphincter, circling outward then back into the centre, probing harder each time, feeling Aud relax as she got used to it. This was a first for both of us.

Aud moaned as she mauled her own breasts, pinching and twisting her nipples as millimetre by millimetre, my tongue advanced into her body. The scent of her pussy filled my nostrils and spurred me on, in the sure and certain knowledge she was enjoying this.

It took a few minutes to ease past her sphincter but as I probed her deeply and she squirmed and moaned under my tongue, it happened. Aud squealed, trembled, writhed and came, sagging sideways onto the bed with one hand buried between her closing thighs, manically frigging her swollen clit.

Perversely, my immediate thought was "That's cheating." She wasn't meant to help things along but I'd won anyway.

"I couldn't wait." She answered, having the grace to look shamefaced. "I was on the brink for so long." She offered me her fingers, sticky with her secretions. This time I did want to taste her. I'd been tormented by the aroma of her arousal for long enough.

I sucked eagerly on her fingers then eased her legs apart and went straight for the source, lapping greedily at her labia, pushing my tongue deep into her quivering pussy, making her sigh with lust as I mopped up the remains of her orgasm. She was so sensitive down there she came again before I'd had my fill of pussy juices, her fists gathering up balls of duvet as her back arched and a cascade of fresh juices gushed straight into my mouth.

I had no intention of letting her rest. I had been teased with the prospect of pussy long enough, I hauled myself back up the bed, lying between her still spread legs and easing my iron hard cock into her, settling my weight on her abdomen as I sank balls deep in her pulsing, throbbing vagina.

"You know I won't last long? There's such a thing as too much anticipation." I got an advance apology in for what I was sure would be a lightning quick performance.

"Shut up and fuck me." Aud said, hooking an arm around my neck and pulling my mouth to hers. I surprised myself by lasting at least a minute before unloading inside her. I rolled over, spent, with Aud now on top of me, still kissing me.

"Well that was fun for me. Did we pass the test?" I asked as soon as I got the chance.

"With flying colours. Adam, I really didn't need to cheat. I just got impatient. It's been a long day's anticipation for me too. I know how Sabine must have felt, having to wait until midnight."

"Sabine? I thought we were testing Suzy's story."

"We've tested both, Darling. And you've won the forfeit."

"I'll have to pass for tonight. I'm literally shagged out. Does the salon on board this boat do waxing?"

"I'm sure it must do. Why?"

"If you go and get yourself waxed tomorrow, while I'm pushing Dad around Istanbul, we'll be able to test part of two more stories: Cas – or was it Pol? – in 'A Brace of Pheasant' and Meg in 'Summer of Love' both claimed to be hypersensitive after losing their curls."

"It was Polly and she shaved it. Suzy was the one who got waxed… by Kimmie."

"I remember. Kimmie kissed it better all night. But there is another reason for the wax option. I want you to tell me afterwards how it felt to be touched so intimately by another woman. Assuming the ship's beautician is a woman."

"She is. And that's why you're going to have to shave me instead. As you mentioned in 'Gotta Love Them Cheerios', the salon staff know me. If I go for a Brazilian, questions will be asked and rumours will abound."

"Ok, but tomorrow night and under controlled circumstances. We'll do a proper before and after sensitivity test. Yes?"

"Ooh yes please. I think I'll spend most of the day reading some more of your stories. I've been to Istanbul before."

"Will you stay here tonight? Or don't you want to be seen creeping out of someone else's stateroom in the morning? Only I really need to get some sleep and I want you to still be here when I wake up." I let her roll off me and get up to go to the bathroom.

"Oh, I'm staying…" She left the bathroom door open so that, from where I lay, I could see her sitting to pee. The sound of women peeing has always turned me on, and I've mentioned it in a few stories. "You really do like that, don't you?" She noticed me reach for my limp but not yet comatose cock as I watched and listened.

"Love it." I'm not ashamed of my perversions. I watched her wipe herself then had the inestimable pleasure of watching as she brought the facecloth to clean my penis. She even remembered to briefly kiss the cleaned tip, just as Sabine had done for Daniel.

When we got into bed properly and turned out the lights, Aud snuggled up against me, letting my restored erection press against her lovely bottom. You can sleep with a hard-on, if you're tired enough.

* * * * *

"Whoa!" I woke up suddenly, to find Aud's lips hermetically sealed around my hard-on, swallowing a second – third? – jet of semen squirted from my cock. I flopped back on the bed, panting.

"Is it better than an alarm clock?" Aud asked, with a sticky grin as she moved up the bed to be able to look down at me, her hand maintaining a firm interest in my cock.

"Much better, but that hypothesis didn't really need testing. Good morning."

She lowered her lips to mine, incidentally testing the second part of the morning BJ scene. It wasn't the longest of most passionate kiss we'd shared. Aud pulled away, making a face.

"Morning breath." She explained, reclining beside me, still massaging my cock back to life.

"Which never happens in Hollywood or erotic stories." I conceded. "But if my mouth tastes like somebody's arse hole this morning, there may be a reason." I toyed with one of Aud's nipples. It responded in much the same way my cock was responding to her hand.

"Touché." She ignored the morning breath this time and I ignored the taste of my semen on her lips, which wouldn't have bothered me anyway. "I think this is ready." She squeezed my cock once more and let go, watching it spring to attention.

"Not the golden shower scene?" I suddenly realized my bladder was sending urgent signals to my brain and I remembered what Sabine had made Daniel do in the shower. I didn't think the shower here was going to be big enough for that.

"Not everything is about your stories, Adam. Sometimes, I just like to be fucked." Aud laid back, legs akimbo and guided me in. Just fucking her – vanilla sex with no toppings – was, perhaps unsurprisingly, a lot of fun. I think, if anything, the pressure from my bladder helped me last longer than I expected to. Aud's velvet grip on my cock felt wonderful and the little sighs and moans told me it felt just as good to her. I didn't rush it, not like last night. Instead I set myself a steady rhythm and allowed myself a little improvisation on the theme of in and out, like a jazzman toying with an old standard.

That was until Aud found the go-faster button by pushing her finger up my bum and tickling my prostate. Spurred into full gallop, I sprinted for the line, coming second with a grunt amid the wailing of Aud's own climax.

"I need the loo." I poised myself over her glistening, heaving breasts. Carefully, I got up and headed into the bathroom. Not wanting to hose the whole place down, I declined to stand for the ceremony, sitting down, tucking my semi-erect cock inside the rim of the bowl and peeing girl style.

Aud watched through the door, grinning at me. "You'd better hurry up and get in that shower. It's gone nine and you have a busy day, remember?"

"I know. I'm late. I don't care." I reached into the shower to turn on the water. "It just means they'll have gone to breakfast without me." I stepped under the flowing warm water and squeezed myself a handful of shower gel. I heard Aud pass the shower to take her turn on the pot. Unfortunately for me, the tinkling of water in the shower drowned out the tinkling of water outside it, which was probably just as well because the last thing I needed was another erection.

When I'd finished washing, Aud was waiting with a smile and a big towel. It's nice to be towelled dry by someone else: Makes one feel pampered, which is rather the point of a cruise.

She'd picked out my clothes for the day too, for which I thanked her with a pat on the bottom (still pleasingly bare). "Time to put all my new toys away." I picked up her dress and tossed it across the bed to her and pulled on my own pants, willing to lead by good example.

Aud stuck her tongue out at me in defiance then stepped into her frock. "I have to go." She slipped on her sandals and came round to my side of the bed, draping last nights white stockings around my neck and pulling me close enough to kiss. "But I shall await your pleasure in my stateroom when you get back. B155."

"B155. Got it." I walked her to the door and took a quick peek outside to make sure the captain wasn't passing or anything like that. "The coast's clear."

"Have a good day." With the briefest of buzzes en passant, she slipped into the corridor.

* * * * *

"Door's open!" I heard a moment after knocking at B155.

"Hi, Aud…Oh my!" She wasn't in sight: I was gob smacked by her suite. Clearly she hadn't understated her financial situation.

"In here." She summoned me to her bathroom where she was just running hot water into the basin. I stood in the doorway a moment, because the sight of her naked was still new enough to merit appreciation. "How was Istanbul?"

"I thought it was too hot but…" I gestured vaguely at her. "in hind sight…" And my gaze was now firmly on Aud's hindquarters. I'd been thinking about that bottom all day and hiding a near constant erection behind a bumbag.

"Easy, Tiger." Aud wiggled her bottom just to watch my eyes jiggle in their sockets. "We have another of your stories to test first." She was arranging herself on the toilet seat, with her legs wide and a small pair of scissors in her hand.

"More than one story." I moved into the bathroom, kneeling directly in front of her and leaning forward to kiss her.

"Mmm. I know. I've been reading the rest of TLC today, and 'Psychology 1 – Virginity 0'. I think that's my favourite so far. I love how Andy talked his way past all Patricia's defences: Silver tongued devil."

I took the scissors and started to carefully clip Aud's curls. "But Patricia got waxed. I was thinking of Meg. I don't think you've met her yet. She's the mother of one of the characters in a series of incest stories, whose daughter talks her out of her pubes."

"I've avoided your incest stories. It's too close to home."

"Tell me." I stopped snipping and sat back on my heels, looking up at her.

"No. It's not sexy… it'll spoil the mood."

I shrugged and carried on snipping away her curls. "Suit yourself… But, personally, I find people's secrets very sexy. Confession is another form of intimacy." Snip… snip… the last of her curls fell down the toilet. I set down the scissors and reached for face cloth, dipping it in the basin then smoothing it over Aud's crotch. Shaving gel next – one of those complimentary toiletries: I hoped there was going to be enough in the sachet.

"My father…" Aud broke the silence in the quietest voice I'd heard from her - And this was a woman who'd whispered sweet nothings in my ear last night. "He took… too much interest in me when I got tits… He was always finding excuses to stand close behind me and look down my top. And he used to deliberately walk in when I was in the bath. My mother finally threw him out when she caught him wanking with a pair of my knickers from the laundry basket.

That feels cold." She was referring to the gel I was spreading over her mons and labia.

"It'll soon warm up." I paid special attention to her puffy labia for no particular reason – except the continual desire to touch this sexy woman. My cock was throbbing in the confinement of my pants and not just because I had a handful of pussy: Her story about her father was turning me on too. "What was he doing with the knickers?"

"Sniffing them, I think. I didn't see and Mum didn't tell me until years later.

And after Cyril's death, I really needed to talk to somebody so my GP referred me to a psychiatrist. I was on antidepressants and my doctor made seeing the shrink a condition of repeating my prescription. He asked if I felt I had any unresolved issues with my father's 'interest' in me: had I married a much older man because he was a paternal figure?"

"And had you?"

"No… I thought about it a lot and the awful truth is I married Cyril because he was rich and spoiled me rotten."

"Aud?"

"Yes?"

"You know you said it'd spoil the mood?"

"Yes."

"So how come you're practically dripping and I've got a hard-on?"

"Because we're screwed up?"

"Yes, that'll be the reason. Scoot forward a bit." I'd shaved her mound and wanted to get to her labia next. "Good. Tell me another story. Tell me how you lost your virginity."

"I lost that on my thirteenth birthday, to George Michael… or a hairbrush, depending on your point of view."

"Go on." I was doing a fingertip search for any stray hairs before rinsing Aud's crotch.

"Wham were all over my bedroom walls back in 1984 and I was one of the million or so teenagers who were totally in love with George. When his first solo single made it to number one on my birthday, I knew it was a sign and decided to give myself to him. After my party, I put Careless Whisper on my record player, set it to repeat, took off my pyjamas, put on my headphones, laid back and pushed the handle of my hairbrush in hard.