Anneke & William

Everything about our friendship was oh so normal. We worked together in a large federal government agency. I was the senior executive in charge of the branch to which he was promoted. I was recently divorced, more or less amicably, and was in my early fifties. My kids had long left home. I was fit, slim, active, enjoying my work, which I was good at, and, I hadn't dated since the divorce, I was feeling the freedom of no longer being restricted by a generally conservative and disapproving wife.

William, although trained as a lawyer, had been working in generalist administrative areas for some time. He had clearly topped the selection process for his current position as a senior policy advisor, one of four such advisors who reported to me. He was bright very intelligent and impressed me by the way he would propose, justify and argue hard for positions he believed in but, after a contrary decision had been taken, would with good will work as hard as possible to support and implement that position. He was clearly destined for big things in the bureaucracy if he wanted to stay. He was 37, well groomed, always in a dark suit and silk tie with polished shoes, smooth skinned and a little overweight. He'd been married for 9 years to a woman five years younger than him. There were two children, one then an infant and one just 2. She had been a high-school teacher but had ceased working when the first child was born.

We hit it off from the beginning. Despite the differences in our age and my position as his boss William and I became close friends as workmates sometimes do. As the weeks went on we fell into the habit of meeting outside the office for lunch or a drink after work. I talked him into playing tennis with me once a week and was working on getting him to join my gym. Although my older, longer term friends would have found it strange to know that I thought of him this way, I began to think of William as my closest friend.

Thus it was that, quite naturally, I was invited to dinner at William's house. It was a pleasant evening with William, his wife Anneke, her former boss and his wife, and another couple whom I now forget. They were sophisticated enough not to have invited an unattached woman to be my "partner" and no-one minded the uneven number.

William's comments hadn't prepared me for Anneke. She was very pretty, very fair, very blonde; the largest clearest blue eyes and a captivating smile. She had an charmingly idiosyncratic way of speaking, making the "th" sound come out slightly like a "d", which entranced me. She was of medium size; a little overweight perhaps or maybe she was just of a slightly chubby build. She was not a model beauty, and certainly not of the tall, slim, small breasted, long-legged style that I found most sexually alluring in women, but nevertheless I found her stunningly attractive and very sexy. She was so pleased to meet William's new friend and made me welcome. Anneke and I hit it off too. We talked about lots of things together but took part in the general conversation with the rest of the group. She clearly liked me and I liked her. At the end of the night, as we said good bye, she said that I must come around more often, that she did not think that William had ever had as close a friend as I seem to have become. I agreed that that would be great. Her lips brushed my cheek in exactly the same way as she farewelled the other two men and as I waved from the gate, she was standing hand in hand with William at the door, the model of domestic perfection.

As time went by my friendship with William developed into a very close friendship with the two of them. We fell into a regular pattern of doing things together, dining at each other's houses or occasionally at restaurants, season's tickets to the theatre, movies, an occasional concert, in the spring and summer picnics along the river bank or in the country. It was an extraordinarily happy time for me and I am sure for them as well. Our closeness had expression in many ways; one was the way that Anneke would hug me on arrival and departure and kiss me on the lips. There was nothing actively sexual about this. The hugs were those of a friend, the kisses of a close and loving sister perhaps. But I found them sizzling. The feel of her body pressed to mine for her hugs and the caressing of her soft yielding lips on mine each time we kissed caused my body to react and became the content of my now regular and frequent erotic dreams and masturbatory fantasies. I imagined her in her underclothes. I pictured her naked. I saw in my mind Anneke making love to William, slow teasing, kissing and fondling. I imagined her seductively undressing for him, offering her breasts to his mouth before kneeling to take his cock in hers. I saw them fucking. I wanted to be William.

But of course I did nothing. I didn't fight against the fantasies but I made them the private stuff of my bedroom. I did nothing, absolutely nothing to reveal to anyone, above all to William and Anneke, that I saw her as anything other than one of my two best friends. It was sometimes hard to resist attempting to let her know my feelings, but I did resist.

I thought that perhaps it was time to start dating again, that being with other women, hopefully making love to another woman, might take my mind off Anneke. But how to find a woman? All those I knew were my ex-wife's friends or married colleagues. I asked William and Anneke for advice and help. It was after a dinner at their house, we were sitting back in the lounge room, wine glasses in hand, just talking about this and that, and feeling close and happy, when I asked, "Do you know any single women who might be interested in me?"

William, who was normally a one or two glass drinker, had had somewhat more that night and he immediately responded in the ribald way of a close friend, "Feeling a bit horny are we Lachlan?"

Anneke, quick to ensure that I wasn't offended, came in with, "Now Will, that's not the only reason. There're lots of reasons why Lachlan might want to date or find someone to settle down with. Lots of reasons. He might just have seen how happy we are and want to emulate that. That's a good thing isn't it?"

"Of course," William said, "Of course. But," and his slightly drunken state came through in the marginal slurring of his words, " he has you as much as I do for all the companionship and talk and well, love, really. Where is he going to find someone he likes better than you? It can only be sex!"

And, turning to me, he continued, "It is isn't it? You just want some one to fuck?"

I smiled and nodded, "Well I guess so. It's been a while you know."

"Yeah! But you don't have to re-partner to get sex you know. You can pick up women for the night at a bar, or go to a prostitute. God, you could even have an affair with one of the women at work. I know Sam fancies you."

I blushed at this. I'd noticed Sam. She was perhaps 40, unhappily married and didn't mind telling everyone in the office. She wasn't unattractive and …

Before I could reflect further though, Anneke came back in with, "Oh Will, give him a go. Not everyone just wants casual sex, even if it was as easy for a guy to get as you suppose. And Lachlan's been divorced for what, nearly two years now. Anyway you're embarrassing him. Not that he needs to be embarrassed with us. You are sooooo right though about the companionship and love that he has. I mean, really, we're a family aren't we. You're right."

She turned to me, putting her hand on my arm, quite gently, and went on, "You do know that don't you? The three of us are just best friends aren't we, it's not Will and me and then you, it's Will and Anneke and Lachlan. You are an equal part of the family.

Then she quickly added, "Except for the sex stuff I mean." She stroked my arm as she removed her hand and my face flushed even more as she held my eyes with her large pale blue ones.

I smiled at her, "I know."

William, stirred in his chair and took another deep gulp from his glass. "Well, he could have that too if he wanted." And to me, "You could you know."

Now Anneke joined me in blushing, a sudden bright redness suffused her pale skin. She was totally taken aback.

Despite an immediate mental flash of myself naked with Anneke, my first deliberate thought was to ease the tension. "You're an idiot William," I yelled, "a total idiot. And you've had too much to drink."

Anneke clearly had much the same response, she swept a cushion from the couch on which she'd bee half reclining and started whapping it on William's shoulders and the back of his head, "You dork Will. Stop being so stupid. Dork. Dork. Dork. What are you? You're a dork"

"I mean it", was all he got out before Anneke and I together started pummelling him with cushions until we all broke up with laughter. It was time for bed. As I said goodnight and left the baby started crying and that gave me the perfect excuse not to give Anneke our usual kiss. I didn't sleep terribly well that night, but I didn't care. My head was full of the most delicious thoughts of Anneke, me with Anneke, Anneke with me. My hands started stroking my body. They were Anneke's hands …

When I awoke I was still thinking of Anneke. But the thoughts now were not so pleasant. I thought that William's comments might have spoilt it for us all. Could I now hug and kiss her as I used to without her thinking I was perhaps coming on to her. How could William remain such close friends with me once he realized that in his cups he had offered his wife to me. Worst of all, how could Anneke ever forget what William had said. How could we ever get back to the easy, wonderful relationship we used to have. How was I going to face them both.

I had already arranged to give William a lift to work that morning and it was with some trepidation that I sounded the horn. William ran out bright and cheerful, giving me his normal happy greeting and sliding in next to me.

"I thought you'd be a bit hung over this morning."

"Nup, I'm fine. I didn't have that much to drink you know. That was a great evening. Thanks for coming round"

"Thank you." As far as William was concerned nothing had changed.

I didn't see Anneke again till the weekend. I called around with my brother's truck to help them pick up some children's furniture. William was still out at the supermarket when I got there. Anneke gave me the most wonderful hug and her trademark soft, slightly lingering kiss.

"Are you OK?" I said.

"Why? What about?"

"About what William said after dinner."

She laughed, "Oh that. He was pissed. Are you worried about it?"

I blushed yet again, and nodded.

"Don't be," she said, "Don't be. There's no need. It's not … it's not, um, it's not going to change things is it. Between us, I mean. I couldn't bear that. You know how much we love you. Please don't think anything more about it. Please. Will has forgotten already."

"But what about you? You haven't forgotten."

She put both arms loosely on my shoulders. Her face was so close to mine. I could have kissed her easily. I wanted to. "I'm OK," she said, "I'm OK. But I'm starting to get worried about you."

"Oh Anneke," I sighed and put my head on her shoulder while she held me to her until we both heard the baby's waking up cry. "I'll get her," I said, as we pulled apart and I went into the house.

At the door I looked back. She was looking at me and when she saw I'd turned round she shook her head slowly with a smile on her face. "What am I going to do with you?" she mouthed. I returned her smile.

Over the next few weeks our life seem unchanged. William hadn't changed at all. Things had changed between Anneke and me however. Neither of us had mentioned the dinner episode again since that Saturday morning. But I was different with her. She knew it and I knew that she knew. And I think she knew that I knew that she knew. Nothing tangible. I looked at her more. I watched her doing the most ordinary things. I didn't like her out of my sight while I was in their house or they in mine or we were out together. I was seeking something from her but I didn't know if it was to be told that she loved me and wanted me or if it was to be given my marching orders for having feelings that could only disrupt her family and her life. I felt jealous of William and had sharp pangs of envy whenever he touched her in those soft, almost absent minded ways that loving spouses do. I avoided staying over at their place whenever possible because I couldn't bear the thought of them going into the bedroom together. I made my life a misery. And I think I made her life miserable too. But I'm sure no one else had any idea.

William's sister in law died. It was an accident and awful for all the family. William went interstate for the funeral and because of his legal background to help settle some complicated matters to do with the will and property and so on. For a whole series of reasons they decided that Anneke and the children should stay at home. For the first time since I had met them, William was out of town.

"Look after them," he told me as I dropped him at the airport late in the afternoon.

"Of course."

My mind told me that I shouldn't see Anneke, that William would only be gone a few days, a week at the outside, that I could make up good excuses for not seeing her during such a short period without either of them suspecting anything. My mind told me that, even as I dialled her mobile phone number and arranged to have dinner at their house that evening.

It was inevitable. We didn't even try to hide it or talk about it or pretend or make excuses. I let myself in the kitchen door. We stared into each other's eyes for the longest time, then, wordlessly, moved together, crushing each other, lips devouring lips, tongues darting and being held, hands, roaming, stroking and holding through our clothes, and, without pause, stripping ourselves and each other, letting clothes drop, discarding them willy nilly, until suddenly we did stop, moved slightly apart and as I feasted my eyes on the nakedness I had dreamed about so much she looked back at my middle aged body with her beautiful, still, large eyes. She took my hand and we went quickly into the bedroom and collapsed on her and William's bed. I kissed her. All over. My lips found her hair, her eyes, her lips and mouth and ears. They lipped and sucked and pressed the flesh of her neck and chest and her soft round breasts. They took in her pinkish hard small nipples and held them there. They traversed the softness of her belly and the warmth of her thighs. They found the hardness of her clit in the hot wet folds of her cunt. And she came with the softest, repetition of little oh-oh-ohs. Immediately she took my head and pulled me up towards her face, kissing me as she guided my hard cock into her. I stayed there for a moment, scarcely daring to move in that velvet slickness before I started rocking in and out, harder and faster, feeling her kisses, tasting her tongue and her teeth as I paused, in those long, long seconds just before the climax, and then pushed into her as hard as I could as I came and came and came. We lay there entwined. She covered my face in kisses and I felt tears on her cheek.

"What are we going to do," I whispered.

"Not now," she said, "Not now."

I stayed there for the 5 days that William was away. I heard one side of her telephone conversations with him in which she assured him that "I love you too baby." And each night, and, on most days, each morning and when I got back from the office, we made love. We fucked. We sucked. We licked. We could not keep our hands or mouths off each other. The children were an encumbrance; the chores of normal living an intrusion. We did what we had to do for kids and house but every moment that we were not naked together was an agony. Yet whenever I suggested we had to talk about the future, she kept repeating, "Yes, I know, but not now. Please Darling, not yet"

It had to end.

I picked William up at the airport as planned and drove him home. He chatted all the way about what had happened in his family after the death and the funeral and how he had solved the legal problems. I don't think he noticed anything different in me.

Not long after he got home Anneke rang me to say that she didn't think he suspected anything and to leave things as they were for a while and that she could drop over to my place for an hour in the late afternoon if I could get away. Of course I could.

It surprised me, how easily I took to hypocrisy. I carried on with William as if he was still my best friend. And it seemed he was. We worked well together. I gave him a superior performance rating in his annual review not out of guilt but properly based on his performance. We lunched together, went for an after work drink, played tennis. I regularly dined with him and his wife. I babysat for them occasionally. And several times a week I fucked Anneke. I seemed to live for those trysts when we snatched an hour here, two hours there, at her place or mine, occasionally at a motel, and on two memorable occasions, like rutting teenagers, on the back seat of my car.

Nevertheless, I felt continuously jealous of William. He slept with her every night. He saw her undressing and dressing, rolling her stockings on, doing her hair, applying make-up, naked, in the shower. I guessed they made love several times a week. I never asked her, but at night I would lie in my bed trying to keep the thought of my best friend fucking his wife out of mind lest the jealousy that that induced should overwhelm me.

Anneke still wouldn't talk much about what we should do. She wanted to put everything off and just live in the moment. I was so besotted I didn't force the issue although I knew that we couldn't go on this way. We would be found out with who knew what results. I wanted to face the issue, decide on our future and then together face the music. We did nothing.

Then, perhaps 4 months into our affair, William and I were having an extended after work drinks session. It was unusual, we seldom had more than two drinks each, William often only one, but Anneke and the children were at her mother's for the evening, with several other female relatives and William had suggested that we eat out.

William was on his fourth glass when he suddenly said, "You remember when we had dinner last autumn and I got a little pissed?"

Of course I remembered, but it surprised me that he did. "Yes, sort of," I responded.

"You remember when I said I wouldn't mind if you made love to Anneke?"

"Mmmmm." I was trying to be non-committal.

"I wasn't just being stupid or too drunk to know what I was saying. I was trying to say that we're like a family as she said, and that there's, sort of, room for all of us. Does that make sense?"

It didn't really. Was he telling me that I could, without guilt continue to enjoy the pleasure of his wife's body and caresses? If so what was his role to be? A consenting cuckold? A voyeur? Was he tentatively suggesting a sexual threesome? A permanent polyandrous relationship? How did I feel about any or all of those options? I certainly didn't want to stop fucking her. I would rather lose his friendship than hers. But it wasn't my place to tell him that. She had to decide, or at least agree on, what we were going to do first.

"Don't be stupid William," I responded, taking the easy way out, "You're pissed again. You are certainly an easy drunk. And anyway, that's no way to be talking about your wife."

"You would love to go to bed with her wouldn't you?" he asked.

"Oh theoretically," I lied. And I continued lying, "You know how much I like her and we get on together so well. I do think she's beautiful and attractive and she is incredibly sexy. But she's you're wife. She loves you. And any way I'm old enough to be her father, and almost yours as well. She doesn't want an old man like me, and even if she did, she certainly doesn't need an old man like me mucking up your life."