Any Chance We Could Ch. 39

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"Tell us about what it's like and what you know about Evie," Ashley excitedly asked.

"First, Evie Graham. She started dating her first husband, Kevin Graham during her junior year in college and he was a senior. They married in August after he graduated. He went to seminary in their hometown and after she finished her bachelor's coursework she worked for a family resource center while also taking a class or two at Kevin's seminary. From what I understand they gave spouses a big discount. Joy was born about two years after her graduation and Gloria four years later."

"Based on her stellar performance the family resource center director encouraged her to work on her Master's in Family Therapy, and when Kevin was approaching ordination he sought a call near where Evie was interested in studying. By that time, Evie had taken a little more than half the classes at the seminary for their two year Masters program. Kevin's appointment was delayed until October so Evie could go full-time over the summer so that with an overload Evie would be fifteen credit hours short of the Master's degree. She's very intelligent. She earned six extension hours and three hours as an independent study, leaving her six hours which she took at another seminary near their new home and have the credits transferred."

"As a Marriage and Family Therapy student she wrote several papers and conducted some studies that so impressed her professors that they submitted them for conferences and publication. Hence, by the time she had her second Masters she was already starting to make a name for herself. After she completed her seminary work she was ordained."

"A year after she finished her MA, Kevin was transferred to a congregation in the St. Louis area.

"Three years after moving to St. Louis, while working for another family counseling center part-time and serving part-time at a large congregation, Evie started to work on her PhD in marriage, and included several classes in human sexuality. During her studies, she had seven papers published in professional journals, and spoke at two professional conferences."

"She seems so down to earth for someone so smart," Ashley observed.

"She's that," Carol agreed.

Katrina asked, "Do you know how she became a swinger?"

"Evie and Kevin became involved in the lifestyle accidentally. Its beginnings go back to a scenario a seminary professor put before a class regarding a wife whose husband had been sexually crippled in Vietnam. The couple asked their minister if in their situation it was okay for her to have a lover ... and the lover she had in mind was their minister because they could trust him. For years Kevin and Evie debated, what was the loving thing to do?"

"By the time Joy was two, they both agreed that in certain circumstances if Kevin found himself in that type of situation and Evie was involved in the decision, neither of them were against it. In the process of the discussion, their views of human sexuality, sex and love evolved. They also started to share various fantasies and played out some of them. Of course, one of Kevin's was the most common male fantasy of having two women in bed."

"Evie and Kevin's first opportunity came when Gloria was almost a year old. Kevin was invited to visit a single mother of a young girl who was attending the Sunday School. The mother rarely attended. At the last minute Evie decided to tag along for the one o'clock visit. When they arrived at her apartment, the woman was surprised to see Evie but awkwardly still invited them in, albeit nervously. She was nervous because in the dining room were two women in negligees and a young man in boxers and t-shirt. Evie knew that some women loved the idea of seducing a member of the clergy, and quickly concluded that they were in such a situation."

"Kevin started to say something that would extract them from the apartment but Evie decided to take charge by saying, 'If you were planning on seducing my husband, you have my blessing as long as I get to play with that young man."

"At three fifteen Kevin and Evie left giggling and exhausted ... and they ended up seeing the three ladies and the young man at services many Sundays after spending a Friday or Saturday evening with them as well as a few other friends."

"That small group evolved to include a few other couples. When Kevin changed churches and moved across town they rarely saw that group again, but they did hook-up with another group of upper middle class couples. I became attached to that group not long after they became involved."

"A few years later, July '97, the summer going into Joy's junior year in high school, they learned Kevin had an advanced inoperable cancerous tumor in his brain and would live only nine to fourteen months. When he learned of his condition he told Evie that the one thing he wanted more than anything else was to see her get her PhD. Kevin bravely fought and lived twenty-six months, during which time she not only completed her dissertation but was invited to become part of Washington's faculty from which she had just graduated in May of '99 and he got to see Joy graduate from high school."

"Evie was by that time becoming recognized in the field and they wanted to keep her as part of their institution. She interviewed at five other universities, three of which extended her invitations, one of which was from an Ivy League school."

"Kevin passed away in just after Labor Day '99. Through it all his church and their lifestyle friends were extremely supportive. It was during this time that Evie and I became very close."

"I'm glad he lived long enough to see her graduate," Katrina said.

"Just before Kevin passed away, Evie's grandfather's will left her more than enough money to retire her mortgage and boast her cash reserves." And Kevin's life insurance more than covered the girls' college tuition."

"A year following Kevin's passing she became an occasional facilitator of a survivors of cancer group. She met her present husband who joined that group starting in Oct '01. Neither thought they could love another as much as they'd loved their first spouses, but both were surprised by how quickly they connected and how quickly they fell in love.

"By Jan '02 they were talking marriage Evie and her husband married in April '02. Though Evie dropped out of the lifestyle group in early '02, we remained close friends. Her husband had his first involvement in the lifestyle in early Feb '04, and it was my pleasure to be his first woman that night. Once he got over his nervousness he was a fantastic lay."

"The lifestyle group I was associated with was a closed membership group of probably sixty men and women. Usually twenty-five couples and ten single women. If a couple divorced, the woman could stay but not the man unless the inner circle approved. Our group met in private homes with usually fifteen to twenty folks at the bi-weekly gatherings. Cathleen joined our group probably four years ago and my niece became a member before she left to go to Harvard. My brother and his wife don't attend very often because they travel a lot. Mom and Dad are in the same situation, lot's of time out of town. Besides I can fuck my parents and my brother and sister-in-law anytime they're available, it doesn't have to be at a gathering."

"As for the lifestyle, there are a host of lifestyle events and types. They range from two couples meeting in restaurants and then going to one of their homes to party, to house parties with half a dozen or so couples, to events where dozens of couples meet at a public bar or club for a connection. There're also groups that reserve a floor or two of hotel, floors that are closed to outsiders. Some events are publicized and open to all. There are a few lifestyle clubs where people gather to enjoy playing with others. Probably the most numerous and hardest to define because they do not publicize at all are parties where attendees are invited by a member of a tight-knit group that meets at a home."

"Though the general public has the impression that 'swingers' are sexual deviants nothing can be further from the truth," Carol said.

"Until recently I would have thought the same," Mary Claire interjected. The other two girls nodded in agreement.

Carol continued, "While each club and group tends to attract particular type of crowds, most lifestyle participants are married, in their 30s, 40s and 50s, and are professionals. Participants are everyday people who you will see in malls, grocery stores and exercise clubs. If you were sitting in a nice restaurant with fifty couples, at least two couples will have been or are in the lifestyle. They could be your teacher, doctor, nurse, police officer, cashier, bookkeeper, secretary, farmer, the local judge, etc. Their outlook on life is for the most part mainstream, the only difference is that they enjoy having sex with others."

"Participants have diverse body types. Don't let looks fool you some individuals you'd think wouldn't be energetic lovers are the most skilled and dynamic lovers. Don't expect to walk into a lifestyle gathering and find people running around naked or in lingerie. Almost all of the women will be dressed in sexy outfits, skirts, blouses and dresses that flatter their assets ... many will be braless, some sans panties. The outfits are selected to be enticing and easily removed and put on again. Men will be dressed in pants and most will have button shirts while the rest will have polos. Later in the evening you'll find a few women in the social room only wearing negligees, lingerie, and robes, but most will have put on the outfits they wore earlier. By that time some men will be in boxers and shirts, but a good number will be wearing their pants again."

"At lifestyle clubs or events in a large house, the main room is for socialization, getting to meet and feel comfortable with each other. Some clubs have a buffet while others have finger food. There may be a television or two off to the side of the main room or in a side room showing erotic movies. In private parties, two to five couples may spend time watching an erotic movie. As they do each may cuddle with their own spouse or another's. There are so many different frameworks that it's hard to summarize them briefly."

"At public meetings that take place at a local bar or club, that is usually selected because it has an area for dancing. You could be dancing with your marital partner and feel a hand of another on your ass or hips ... it's a signal that they're interested in connecting with you and your partner, and turning to ask if they want to exchange partners would be a welcomed response."

"At private lifestyle clubs the gathering normally has a BoB bar because they're not a public establishment but a private unlicensed club where members are allowed to bring their own libations. Heavy drinking is frowned on, smoking has become a no-no. If someone smells of smoke my immediate response if approached is 'no'. Drugs are forbidden and so are cameras and cell phones."

"In social clubs socialization in the group room will include much sexual bantering. Sex in the group room is considered disrespectful and frowned upon. Believe it or not, even swingers want to have space to socialize without sex being pushed into their face. Sex takes place in side social rooms, bedrooms and other party rooms."

"The sex must be wonderful," Mary Claire put in.

"Will the sex be fantastic and mind blowing? Maybe, maybe not," Carol replied. "As mentioned, some you think will not be great lovers will surprise you. Some who talk a great game, are not great lays. I have met many men who are also far more than just talk. So some partners will be better than others. Some partners will clearly thrill and pleasure you thoroughly. Don't discount the added excitement of being with a new person, or with a person whom you have been with only a few times before, to make the experience more of a rush. Ultimately, the primary factor to your enjoyment is the attitude and energy you bring."

"Some attendees at gatherings have voyeuristic tendencies, spending most of their time watching ... often drawing great pleasure from watching their spouse being fucked. There are some who are exhibitionists and get highly excited and turned on by being watched ... yes, some will overdo it and be acting more than expressing truly what they're feeling. After attending a few parties you'll know those who're overdoing it."

"Some attendees have and hold to strict parameters they have set for themselves, or have established with their partner. For example, a few will not French kiss anyone but their spouse. Others will only fuck another if their spouse is watching or is in the same room. For most it's an opportunity to try new things and do things that have not been done with their marital partner. Oral and anal sex come to mind."

"Are there any basic rules or are the rules only set by each person," asked Ashley.

"There are basic rules that are found almost everywhere. The number one rule is respect others. Number two rule ...'no' means 'no'. Number three rule, no drugs. Number four, other than in closed groups that know and trust each other, condoms are expected to be worn. Going bareback isn't common, but both must agree if there is to be barebacking," Carol noted.

"The idea of condoms doesn't thrill me. I like the idea of feeling a man shooting off in me," Mary Claire grinned. "I think I'd prefer to be in more of a closed group."

Carol nodded her understanding, "Number five, good personal grooming is a must. Manners too are a must.

Katrina interjected, "I would think most men want to swing more than women."

"Men normally are the ones who persuade their shy and/or reluctant wives to their first parties," agreed Carol. "Though once they get involved, the wives are the ones who usually keep the couple involved in the lifestyle. When it comes to planning house gatherings or planning when they will go to a club, the wives do most of the planning. You'll rarely find single men. On the other hand single women are most welcome and eagerly accepted."

"What about women being with each other?" asked Katrina.

"Though a woman is not expected to be so involved, sex between women happens frequently for their own pleasure, and sometimes for the entertainment of their husbands. The lifestyle is a great means for a married woman to explore and give expression to her bi side. In most groups, sex between men doesn't happen ... sometimes it may happen in a private house party with two or three couples if the men are so inclined. In most groups, sex between two men at a lifestyle event will commonly be frowned upon and in some cases negatively affect the mood of the party.

"Though some couples love to target and play with newbies or near newbies, a surprising number of couples prefer not to play with newbies since newbies are still feeling their way.

"Many party homes and lifestyle clubs have hot tubs. Women tend to frequent the hot tubs more than the men."

Mary Claire asked, "What if a woman is, you know ... is on the rag?"

"A natural question," Carol agreed. "Women who are having their period may attend, and some do so. A woman wearing only panties or a bathing suit bottom is a signal that she isn't an active participant that night, she's having her period. But she may give a blowjob or have someone play with and suck her boobs. Most women avoid lifestyle events when having their period. In closed groups, it's not uncommon for most of the women to be on the same pill cycle to simplify the planning of parties and group trips."

"At on-premises social club events, nearly all clubs require new attendees to attend an orientation meeting an hour or so before others start to arrive. You need to expect that if you are thinking of going to a club. The orientation is an opportunity to walk them through the club, go over the house rules, answer any questions and to ensure that the couple understands what they are about to do. For small private parties as well as those that are made up of a closed circle, the couple who is bringing the new couple are required to go over the orientation with the new couple before arrival."

"A group may be semi-closed in that members do frequent other groups and clubs and thereby do not spend most or all of the time with only those of a single group. Attendees are free to invite other couples and single women to attend by calling the hostess and host beforehand. Showing up with a new couple without calling a few days beforehand is disrespectful. Occasionally a single man may attend for a night or two with the pre-screening and approval of the organizers/inner group."

"Because they meet in homes of members, the size of the closed or restricted party can vary from five to eight couples to twenty or more. Affecting attendance is size of the home, time of the month and time of the year. Some members with larger homes have basements and pool gazebos that are designed to support larger parties."

"I've attended open social clubs and found that the participants are too much of a mixed bag for me. I pretty much settled on the closed group and when I was attending gatherings I enjoyed them more than the 'club' events."

"Why are you a swinger?" asked Ashley.

"Why did I begin and remain involved for years?" she asked and then smiled. "Simple, for the enjoyment of sex, there are some men who pretty much turn me on and satisfy me. I found it to be a better and safer sexual release than going to a bar and trying to get picked up by who knows what kind of man. There are three or four couples that I usually fuck the night away with and I seek out whenever I attend. Now that I'm joining this family I'm not going to attend anymore gatherings unless your Mom and Dad want to. With their permission I'd be glad to attend with you guys, but not as a participant unless they agree beforehand."

"I know you could go on all night about some of your experiences, but you give us just one?" asked Mary Claire.

"Sure," smiled Carol. "One evening, late, there were six of us women and three men in a side room. The men had us line up side by side and bend over the side of the bed, then they walked behind us and entered each of us for eight or nine strokes before pulling out and moving to the next pussy. The first woman to come was the winner. The woman on my left came after twenty minutes or so during that time each of us was fucked by three different men and least five or six times by each. After the winner declared herself two of us stayed until we both came. None of the men ever did come."

"Ooh, how sexy," remarked Katrina. "So you never really knew which man was in you? Didn't you care?"

"Only that there was a cock in my cunt and making me feel good," replied Carol. "You don't do it for the emotional satisfaction, just for the sex. Each man's tool was different than the other, one an inch or so longer than the other two. Another was so much thicker than the others and the third, had a large curve to his cock that rubbed me inside so differently than the other two."

"Did Mom ever go with you?" asked Ashley.

"I'd asked her several times and she refused. She said she couldn't just have sex. She needs an emotional attachment, which very obviously Scott has provided. She'd probably go now because she has Scott. Although she still hasn't had a male partner other than Scott, despite the number of women who've shared their bed."

"I know she'd like to fuck Dave, the contractor, and Emerson as well. In fact so'd the three of us," grinned Katrina.

"Maybe that time'll come," grinned Carol remembering what a good fuck Dave Hawks was.

##

Over dinner we discussed where we should go on our RV trip. The proposed route for the RV trip was agreed to meander south to Florida, by-passing New Orleans, then back up the Atlantic Coast to D.C. then turn west to come back home. From experience Hazel and Emerson agreed that two weeks would be adequate and Emerson told me that he'd bring some brochures over on Monday to show me some of the rigs available to rent. Hazel said she would come over as well so that she and Veronica would look for tourist information online and start to plan stops.