Any Chance We Could Ch. 46

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"Scott's right my love. He still has feelings for his Cathleen and I'm fine with him having them. I'm coming to understand what Evie means that love is expansive rather than being finite. The more we love, truly love, and are secure in ourselves, the more we're able to love and warmly recall those past love relationships. The feelings I have for you, Cindy and Mary Claire has not taken anything away from the love I have for Scott. If, anything my love is deeper for him. We trust you and know you're committed to us, our marriage and our family. Any feelings you had or still have for Jack will not threaten that since we're your primary relationship and love."

"I agree with Veronica," I added. "When I was with Cathleen, I didn't have sex. I made love to her. If Veronica is right I may have an opportunity to be with Hazel. If, and I mean if, that happens, it will be by both of our consents and with the assurance that our spouses are okay with it too. Also, as Hazel has been part of my life for so long, and given our friendship, I'll be making love to her, not just having sex."

"And I'm okay with it," Veronica agreed. "His feelings for Mary Claire and you hasn't diminished his love and passion for me. Love is not like a pie, the more pieces we cut from it the less each person receives."

Wiping the last of her tears from her eyes, Carol half grinned, "I understand. I haven't felt threatened by your feelings for Cathleen, and doubt I would for Hazel. I get your point but for now I still need to give more thought to all of this. I'm no longer single but have to take into account our impending marriage and relationships."

"Does this mean that you don't want to swing again," I asked in a neutral tone.

"Yes, I thought about it in the bar and on the way home, our home. I took a cab by the way. I had to face that I enjoy it and would miss having multiple partners in a single night, but I'll swing only if one or the both of you accompany me. I'll mentor our daughters if they want, but if they're the only ones of my family there, I'll keep my panties on and put my pussy out of play. Is that okay with you?" she looked at us with pleading eyes.

"Yes, if that's what you want. Now get undressed, and get back in our bed. We love you so much," softly said Veronica.

As Carol climbed off the bed to undress she looked at the TV and seeing Max's frozen image and our wife she asked, "When was this?"

"This afternoon, want to see all of it. I wasn't here so I know I would," I grinned.

"Sure, let me get undressed, pee and brush my teeth," smiled Carol for the first time since she'd gotten home.

We watched and rated Veronica's performance as an eight and Max's as a six, but he was showing improvement. "God, were you really having those last two orgasms?" asked Carol.

"I was, but I was overacting. Hazel was listening on the phone, see it lying there? And I wanted to get her more hot and bothered. We had a meeting with Evie and since our dates with Amy Anne and the kids got postponed I thought we'd take Hazel and Emerson out to dinner Saturday then over to a strip club on the East side."

"Aww, too bad I have a date with Katrina, I'd like to join you," smiled Carol.

"Well, we're still coming back here after and you could join us, make you feel better?"

"I'm drained, completely drained. Do you mind if I just go to sleep," Carol said as we snuggled her between us.

##

Dave held Corrine's hand as the elevator rose to the hotel's seventh floor and their suite for the third time today. She seemed to be a little nervous. His time with her so far had been enjoyable, particularly the conversations he'd with her as they traveled to Springfield. She'd welcomed his hand on her stocking clad thighs during the drive from St Louis. He found her to be a vivacious, playful, articulate intelligent woman all of which was what he liked in a woman. She was very forthright about her husband's neglect and extra-marital affairs, and that her marriage was now one in name only. While he didn't ask for any details, from what she said he concluded that she'd initiated steps to dissolve her marriage.

Truth be told, as the annual meetings grew closer Corrine was not too far from his thoughts, nor was the desire to be buried deep inside her warmth. In her he saw characteristics of her daughter Mary Claire who when he first met her was somewhat reserved but now exuded and celebrated her sexuality. He believed Corrine had the same exotic sensuality and a raging passion resting below the surface. He hoped the trip would help that passion to come to life. He'd know shortly as the moment for it to emerge was this evening.

Throughout the late afternoon registration cocktail reception he and many of the other adjustors quietly admired her. The fitted blue dress flattered her shape. Its scooped neckline and the half bra that lifted her breasts enticingly drew admiring eyes. When she walked away to visit the lady's room about an hour into reception, her swaying hips brought forth lustful desires.

At about five they headed back up to the room so she could change into something more suitable for the first of two banquets. Dave hastily washed up at the sink outside the bath and was close by when Corinne reappeared in a very well fitted red dress, plunging neckline, dark hose, sling-back red pumps, her make up perfect, hair lightly styled and caressing the top of her mostly bare shoulders.

"You look perfect,' he murmured as he took both her hands and stood in front of her drinking her in.

"Thank you kind sir" she demurely replied.

Dave slipped into his jacket, adjusted his tie and they walked to the elevator to go to the banquet room.

Dave thought she seemed to get a lot of attention this afternoon, but it seemed as if all eyes were on her now. If she spoke, or even moved, all the men at the table would give her their attention, much to the chagrin of their own companions. He also noticed Dawn, a new forty-something adjustor from Columbia also discreetly watching her. After the speaker finished and the desserts and coffee were cleared Dave began to anticipate the rest of the evening as they stood and gave their goodnights to those around them. Corinne had a knack for names and addressed each by their name.

There was a moment of awkwardness as he put his arm around her waist as they exited the elevator and walked along the hallway toward their corner suite.

As he put the card in the door lock he wished they 'd more time to enjoy each other before they had to rush off to the opening dinner reception just ended, but time didn't allow them to tease one another. Shortly after they arrived just after noon he'd rushed out to attend a committee meeting which regrettably ran longer than anticipated. When he returned, time was so tight that time to shower was lacking. He quickly washed and shaved at the second sink outside the bathroom while Corinne dressed inside it. When she emerged, she was stunning and desirable. Her lovely perfume filled his nostrils and added to her sexiness.

Now the moment he'd anticipated was at hand. When the door closed Dave drew her into his firm arms. Pulling her closer and capturing her mouth with his, their tongues dueled. The throb in his gray dress pants increased as their kiss became increasingly breathy and passionate. With her pressed into his chest he felt her nipples harden. They both moaned in shared delight.

They parted for a moment. In the silence of the moment their eyes met and locked. She groaned again, and closed her eyes for at least ten seconds. The expression on her face changed as her eyes opened and she shook her head. "I...I can't ... do this," she stammered.

While frustrated, Dave fought the temptation to impose his will on her. He looked into her eyes and assured her, "We'll not do anything unless you're ready."

"Please, don't be angry with me. I know it makes no sense, but...but I just can't ... do this."

Taking her hand he led her to the small sofa, sat her down on one end, then sat on the other. Turning to her he said, "Tell me about it."

"I feel like I'm cheating on my husband and being unfaithful to my marital vows." She started to cry, "I'm confused."

With tears running down her cheeks Corrine quietly continued, "Last week I saw a divorce lawyer. My resolve waivered while we talked about each step and my reasons for divorcing him. Sure he's messing around in St Louis and Chicago with other woman and even a classmate of Mary Claire's here in town, but divorce seems ... it's so final, ... an admission that I failed. I just couldn't tell her to start the process. Then, the next day I called her to tell her to prepare the papers and hire the private investigator. She texted me last Saturday that the PI had the pictures. Yet when I got back from my trip to Dallas on Tuesday and signed the papers, I still told her to hold off serving them."

"That's okay. You weren't ready," Dave replied indicating his understanding.

Corrine nodded. "I know I need too, but part of me couldn't admit failure."

"You think that's a logical feeling?"

"You're right, no. I know it takes two to make a marriage. I know what you're getting at, if one doesn't work at it and fucks around, no matter what the other does, it's a failed marriage." After pausing and wiping her eyes she said, "You know what I did Sunday night? I called his cell. I knew he was with her. I told him what I knew and that I'd enough. When I said I had pictures he said I didn't because he hadn't cheated on me. He had the nerve to say that. I lost it Dave. I screamed at him and told him that he could go to hell. If I'd been there I'd have clawed both their eyes out."

Seconds later she threw herself into his arms and cried for over a half hour on his chest. Without saying a word Dave held her, allowing her to grieve the death of her marriage. Intellectually she may have let go of her marriage, but not emotionally.

An hour later, dressed in boxers he climbed into the king bed and slid between the top sheet and the comforter. Noticing that the sheet was acting as a barrier between them, Corrine said, "You don't need to do that. I trust you."

"Corrine you're too tempting. I need to do this for me. I don't trust myself," he quietly replied.

"Thank you for being so understanding and such a gentleman." Then she held him and placed her head on his chest. He then turned off the bedside lamp and kissed the top of her head.

In the darkness she asked, "Can I ask you some very personal questions?"

"I'll answer as long as I feel comfortable."

In the stillness of the room she asked, "How can your wife feel okay with you being with me or any other woman? I mean doesn't she get resentful or protective? If I saw the man I loved with another woman I suspect I'd be very angry. And what about you? How do you feel about her being with other men?"

"You've hit upon an age-old issue," Dave said as she raised her head see as much of his face in the darkened room as possible. "I had a similar conversation this week with someone else. While I spoke of my reaction as being without any type of jealousy, admittedly there have been occasional moments when it has reared its head. It wasn't strong but nonetheless, it was there."

"So what did you do?"

"Nothing. I recognize it, allow myself to feel it, control my reaction and remind myself of my love for my wife and hers for me, and that we are fully committed to each other. I remain focused on her joy and satisfaction. Later I talked with Evie. She's had such moments herself. Through talking with each other and judicious self-examination we accept our feelings, its cause and what triggered it."

"Its causes?"

Dave explained, "Whether you call it anxiety, ... jealousy, ... possessiveness, they're much the same to me. Such feelings can arise at an insecure moment. They can be triggered by an irrational fear of being left out or fearing that my wife would leave me. Being in a strong loving relationship where both partners are open and honest with their thoughts without the fear of rejection certainly helps."

"Do you ever have a concern that another person is a better sex partner than you?"

"That too is a cause. There are plenty of guys who can do things better than me to pleasure my wife. There are things I do that are better than them as well," he laughed. Dave rubbed her back as he continued, "Your spouse being with a person who has a better body or who is a more energetic lover can be a challenge for some, including me."

"But you have such a great body," Corrine said with a smile on her face. She could not believe that he would hint at being insecure in that area.

"We are toughest on ourselves and see our flaws more than others. I try to keep my focus on the woman I'm with and her satisfaction. When I can I'll celebrate the pleasure my wife is experiencing. You have to keep it from being a competition to prove that you're the better lover ... easier said than done, particularly for some of us."

She observed, "My husband was very possessive and jealous of not only me but even his car. Even when he was on the road, I wasn't allowed to drive it."

"Our culture is materially based for sure. I'm not against nice things, but we have to keep everything in balance."

"I agree. He seemed to view me more like I was his possession to use and dismiss as he desired."

"I'm sorry you were on the receiving end of such an attitude. When we focus on accumulating property it's an attitude that can carry over to our relationship with our spouses. Seeing one's spouse as a possession that is 'mine' can bring on jealousy. In jealousy's extreme forms even innocent relationships tend to be viewed with suspicion. Yet such feelings aren't necessarily inevitable in our relationships, particularly so in marital relationships."

"You said something about high confidence in your relationship with and love for your wife. Does that mean strong personal self-esteem and confidence in your marriage, and loving your wife deeply helps to limit those negative feelings?"

"Yes. And interestingly the more open and giving my wife and I become towards each other and others, the less jealousy we experience."

"So your wife experiences jealousy too?" she asked with a awn.

"Definitely does, as I said earlier. It's become increasingly rare but when it does happen, she's well in control of her feelings."

Corrine yawned, "You've given me much to contemplate. I hope we can talk about it further. I'm too tired to think about all of this right now."

A short time later, from her breathing Dave could tell she was asleep. While he was disappointed that they hadn't made love, he was pleased they'd talked things out rather than having sex. As he too fell asleep he knew he'd done the right thing both for himself and for her.

Half asleep, Dave was conscious enough to be aware that when he rolled over he was alone in the bed. He opened his eyes to see Corrine sitting in the dark looking out the uncovered window. Without turning on a light he extracted himself from the bed covers took several steps, and then silently embraced Corrine from behind.

In the moonlight he could see she'd been crying but was not now. In a hushed voice she said, "My marriage is long dead. I know it. I'm prepared to let go even though I feel like a failure, as a wife ... as a person." Dave hugged her more tightly trying the best he could to comfort her.

After about a half minute of silence she explained, "I've been sexually frustrated in my marriage and I've all but thrown myself at one of our junior employees. Thank goodness he was either too scared or too inexperienced to do anything."

She sighed, took a deep breath and without looking back at him she continued, "I've been sitting here thinking about what I desire and need. I long to be wanted, to have someone in my life who thinks I'm special, warts and all. I envy my daughter who is so full of life and now knows what she wants. I'm happy by how she has opened up and is enjoying life. I was worried about her since she was a junior in high school. Now she wants to change her name to Appleton and go to college."

"I have these fantasies of being a wild sexual woman who's fucking around, enjoying life as she does many sexual things. And get this, in some of them I'm a sex slave either to a man or a woman who order me to do things, things I wouldn't do on my own yet do them because they order me. Then when I do them I love them. I'm wondering if my secret urgings are a result of some mental disorder."

Dave again squeezed her as he replied, "I don't think so Corrine. There are a good number of people who have a subservient fantasy. I think you're trying to work out who you want to be, a vivacious sexual being or a woman who keeps a tight control on her sex life. You'll be okay once you decide what you want and what's best for you."

"You may be right. I did stuff with my daughter as well as with the Appletons. It felt so great and wonderful. I loved every moment. I felt so free and happy for days afterwards, so much so that when you invited me to come with you I quickly said yes. It was exciting and so naughty too. Yet part of me also felt ashamed for doing what I did and for agreeing to come with you. I was angry at my husband for cheating and here I was doing the same thing. The only difference was the degree. When I looked at my wedding ring, I felt as if I had committed a crime. His cheating didn't justify me doing the same. I know it's a false guilt."

Silently she stood, turned towards him. The first rays of the rising sun were starting to illuminate the horizon. Dave could see resolve as she picked up her cell, made a call. As she took off her wedding rings and after a faint echo of a voice mail ended Corrine said, "Jen, this is Corrine. Go ahead with filing the papers and serving him. The marriage is dead. It's time to move on."

Putting down her cell she turned and kissed Dave, "Thank you Dave for giving me space. You're right, I need to make up my mind and get on with life. What time is your first meeting?"

"Nine-thirty. I gave you no answers. You knew them already and just needed to have time to realize it."

"Thank you anyways." She squeezed him tighter, "How about I get a little more sleep and then do something to let my sexual animal out of its cage."

"Sounds good to me if you're definitely sure," he grinned.

Raising her left hand she showed him her empty finger. "I'm certain. I'm now single. And I'm fully available," she said with a big grin.

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AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
please finish this story

please we want to know what happens with the Appletons

digdaddyrichdigdaddyrichover 11 years ago
I have missed this series for some reason

An I'm just caching up.

As always a great chapter, and written with a lot of emotion, and felt by this reader.

Thanks for he read.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
did someone die ??

It's been 3 months since the last episode ... any idea when you might finish this and get to the "Point" of it ... ie- the wedding night with your girls ?? And PLEASE STOP adding new people ! I need a score card to figure out who is who and that takes away from the story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Nice story line...

I have enjoyed the story from start to finish so far and look forward to more. There are quite a few characters to follow and sub-plots but overall nicely done. LOL, leave a few more typos for those of us who are literary editors. It'll drive them crazy and get more comments and notice. Good Luck!

Cowboy2kewl

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
NEXT CHAPTER

you are wrighting a great book. BUT please do NOT add any more carectors. it is to the point where i need a crib sheet to know who is who.

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