Ardmore Pt. 03

This is part 3 of a 4 part story. There is virtually no sex in this story. Your comments, good or bad, are always welcome.

Chapter 9: Awakenings

I awoke the next day to sounds of laughter coming from downstairs. Ordinarily, I would have gone back to sleep but I recognized the voices of several of my sisters so I rushed to get ready to join them; it was either that or wait to be accosted by my young nieces and nephews.

In the kitchen were my mother, and my sisters Gina, Gloria and Julia along with my niece. Gina and Gloria I saw frequently. Gina had moved out earlier in the year but seemed to think that our refrigerator was an extension of her own. We saw more of her now after moving than the last year she lived at home. Gloria came by every couple of weeks.

But it was Julia whom I missed most. We had not seen her since the spring, though she talked often by phone with us. As hugs were exchanged she ran her hand across the back of my head. I expected some razzing about my cue ball, particularly from her. I told her when I shaved my head and she had seen it earlier, but this was her way of kidding me.

"Where are the boys?" I asked, trying to deflect conversation away from my baldness. While the women in my family were raucous when they were together, that noise could not compete with my five-year old nephews. They were inquisitive dynamos and dangerous around breakables.

"Chris and Papa took them to Philly. They were going to the Franklin Institute for the day. Maria here wanted to stay with her mommy." She added that while holding onto my youngest niece, a four-year old charmer who was a younger version of her mother.

True to form, the child ran up to me, fascinated with my shiny head. She and I were friends but hadn't seen each other in months. As I lifted her to my embrace she brushed her fingers across my dome, stroking it like she had never seen such a thing; much to the delight of my mother and sisters. Chalk one up to the ineligible player.

There were still some missing little people. I turned to Gloria and asked, "Where are your munchkins?"

"Howard has them at the zoo", she answered, as if pleased with herself. I caught sight of a fleeting frown from Julia when it was said. I steered clear of that topic and began tickling little Maria.

After that, I settled into the previous conversation, catching up on Julia's life. It was a welcome change from some of my adventures. I was also pleased that Papa had finally accepted Chris and was making every effort to integrate him into the family.

My father rarely made mistakes about people, but when it came to his family he was undoubtedly overprotective, in this case to the point of cultivating an irrational bias. Regardless of how Chris looked in his scruffy beard and torn jeans while courting Julia, and forgetting his supposed 'bad' reputation, Papa had to admit that he was a man who commanded respect.

Chris and Julia were well mated. She blossomed in their marriage, and with her love he matured beyond any of my father's expectations. Defying Papa's predictions Chris joined the police force in Salisbury, MD, acquired a degree at night and fathered Papa's first grandchildren. He had risen to Sergeant and was twice decorated for valor. But long before that, early in their marriage, Papa admitted to both he and Julia that he had been wrong to prejudge him.

I had never heard of Papa doing such a thing, and I told him so. He shocked me, telling me no man was too big to admit his error, too prideful to allow a lie to harm his family. That day I learned what respect was, and how strong a feeling it became when mixed with love.

While we were talking, the doorbell rang. By some unseen agreement I was expected to see who it was. I opened the door and there stood Adrienne. All she said was "Hi", which I returned. I had not expected her and that, plus the way she was dressed caught my attention.

It was unseasonably warm that September and Adrienne was wearing pink blouse with a mid calf floral print skirt. The skirt accentuated her hips and showed just enough leg to make a man take notice.

I guess I stared a little too long for she caught me checking her out. I had never unconsciously done that before. It made for an awkward moment, until I discovered my voice. "So what brings you out this morning?" I said, trying not to sound too sheepish.

She must have decided to let me off the hook for she did not hesitate in her answer. "Julia invited me to go shopping with your sisters...and she's also going to help me look for a prom dress."

"You're shopping for a prom dress in September? Isn't that a little early?"

"David, please go study or something that is unless you want to come with us?"

I recognized that statement as coming from Julia who had moved behind me. I hadn't heard her approach but her tone made it sound like I had asked a rather dumb question.

"I probably won't buy anything, but I do want to get a look", answered Adrienne.

"What cute shoes!" came from my sister Gloria who had also arrived on the scene.

That told me it was my time to leave. How anyone could spend more than two seconds discussing shoes was beyond me. Only little Maria seemed immune to that topic and in a few years she too would be fawning over a 'cute' pair of pumps.

But that would be a worry for another day; today Maria was following me around as I went looking for my old trigonometry texts. I would need to have a number of different references in order to solve the problems. Between my textbooks and old notes I would be prepared for Sydney.

Of course Maria was talking the entire time. She was deep in the process of telling me about her friend's sleepover. The conversation was mainly one-sided. Every so often I would get in a question, but Maria was so serious that my delight came from seeing how intense and animated she was in retelling her story.

Even at nineteen I knew that I loved little ones. They were fascinating: so fresh, hopeful and innocent. Coming from a large family you might think that I did not one for myself. Quite the opposite, I loved children and wanted a houseful.

Part of reasoning came from the fact that all of my younger nieces and nephews gravitated towards me when they visited. I was the 'fun' uncle, the one not afraid of being silly with them or listening with unwavering concentration to their stories. Today, decades later, there is nothing that can so quickly give me a feeling of well-being, of contentment, as the laughter of children.

Sometime later Adrienne came into the room. By then Maria had found a book she wanted me to read for her. I say wanted, but actually Maria plopped herself in my lap, book in hand, demanding that I read to her. What could I do? My prior plans were put on hold as we read together.

That is how Adrienne found us, immersed in the story, Maria staring pensively at the pages.

"Maria, your mother wants you. We are getting ready to go." Said Adrienne as she watched the child take up her book, place it on the table and then scramble off to the kitchen.

My Trig book had been casually tossed on the adjoining table and was now under the child's story. Adrienne was caught temporarily watching Maria leave. Once gone, she turned back to me and lifted the thin book to see what we had been reading.

"Nancy Drew?" She asked. Her brow furrowed in the question. "Isn't she a little young for this?"

"Not the way I read it", I replied smirking. She then scanned the book under it noting it was a math text. "Did she like that one too?"

"Very funny. I originally came in here looking for one of my old textbooks. I have a tutoring job coming up this week."

"You're tutoring?" She asked, looking at me as if I had grown a second head.

"Yeah, a relative of one of my coworkers needs help in Trig."

"Oh" was all Adrienne said. I could tell she wanted to ask something else but held her question. "I better get going. See you tomorrow?"

"Sure, and don't take any of Gloria's suggestions. She doesn't know what 'spend wisely' means. You won't have any money left if you listen to her."

Adrienne smiled before heading out and leaving me alone.

I reviewed my old notes over the next few days before meeting with Sydney. Cassie had given me her address, wanting to have the sessions there as opposed to the main library branch downtown I suggested. Remembering my experience with Dee Dee, I was initially uncomfortable going to her home but agreed nonetheless.

She lived in Northeast Philadelphia, way up the boulevard near the county line. I turned into a tree lined street much like my own. Most of the block was single family dwellings with the exception of a long two story brick building at the corner. That building was where Cassie lived.

There were three mailboxes in the vestibule. The first was for C. Austenberry, which I rang without hesitation. Cassie must have been me walk up for I was buzzed in immediately.

She met me on the first floor. Hers was the front apartment. She was wearing what looked to be a navy blue business suit. Her hair was styled differently than when she worked but she was no less attractive. If I thought she was preparing me for another role in her apartment that idea was confirmed when she brought me in for a huge embrace. Upon crossing their threshold I met her niece.

You could see the family resemblance. Sydney was around five-seven or so, a bit taller than your typical twelve-year old. Like Cassie, her hair was long and flowed gracefully over her shoulders. There was the same wide mouth and high cheekbones and those serious pale blue eyes.

The presence of glasses separated her from her aunt. Under no circumstances would you mistake her for anything other than a kid, her catholic girls uniform would see to that. But for a teenager her mannerisms and speech were those of someone much older.

She was however, a bit stiff in her greeting. I shared her apprehension and didn't try to engage her too long in the introduction; instead diverting my eyes to the furnishings of their apartment.

The place was open with ceilings higher than I first thought. The windows ran floor to ceiling and light filtered softly across the room. The furnishings reminded me of my sister Gloria's place. Gloria was into the ultra modern look, and evidently so was Cassie. It was a style my sister Julia said was not designed for children, not for boys anyway. My only concern was that I might have a problem sitting for long periods in her chairs.

Sydney and I got down to business almost immediately, working in what looked to be a den converted from the third bedroom. It took but a few minutes for me to pickup on the reason for the young girl's hesitation. The reason was her voice.

When we started talking at length it was impossible not to notice that she had a very soft speaking voice; not the fakeness of a Marilyn Monroe, but the gentle honesty and self assurance of a Jacqueline Kennedy. She was such a serious student that her voice eventually ceased to be a distraction but it did take me a few weeks.

Our first session went for two hours, a good deal of that time we spent in assessing her strengths, weaknesses, her course material and the resources we would use in subsequent meetings. The girl was sharp and the 'job' was much more fun than I had anticipated.

I assisted Sydney twice a week from September until mid-December. Our association proved to be highly successful. By her mid-term exams she had mastered the material and we all expected her to ace the course. I attempted to disengage at that point but both she and Cassie objected. Our meetings by then had become less about the course and more like friends having a visit, so it was very uncomfortable for me to continue to accept payments.

Having become more of a family friend, it became obvious to me that Cassie did not have too many of those. Aside from another female tenant in the building, a retired lady who watched Sydney while Cassie worked, I heard very little about anyone else during my visits.

Without asking, the story of how Cassie came to be a dancer came out in pieces over the course of those months.

Cassandra Austenberry was a student athlete in high school. With hard work and shear force of will she acquired the means to go to college and was three years into a degree in nursing when she met someone I'll call Doctor Right.

At the time the good Doctor was himself a second year resident. He was handsome, wealthy, charming, self-assured, and driven. He wooed Cassandra by first ingratiating himself to her family. Eventually she fell for him and the two moved in together. She did so at the cost of her degree, which Doctor Right persuaded her to put on hold.

After a year of playing house, Doctor Right was offered a cardio internship in Philadelphia. Cassandra, when asked to accompany him, enthusiastically agreed. A wedding was discussed and she fully intended to become Mrs. Doctor Right. Six months in their new home in Philadelphia those plans took a dramatic turn.

Cassandra's older sister and husband were tragically killed in an auto accident. They left four-year old Sydney an orphan. Cassandra's parents were in no condition physically or financially to raise a child, nor were the grand parents on the father's side.

With no other aunts or uncles one to care for her, Sydney was in danger of going into the state foster care system. Cassandra was adamant that that not happen. She stepped in and offered to provide a home. With Doctor Right's financing the legal assistance and some influence used by his family, she got custody.

However, the move marked the beginning of the end of their engagement. It was Doctor Right's family that pushed him to be supportive. But upon Sydney's installation in the household, it became obvious Dr. Right resented having to share his space, and more importantly, his woman's attentions, with the child.

Within a few months he had kicked out the two, and Cassie was forced to move in with friends. She never said why she chose to remain in town or how exactly she came to work for Rui. I never asked. Nor did she volunteer what she felt at the time about that decision. Whatever her thinking, she became an unqualified success in the business. Now, some seven years later, she was talking about quitting.

Over the moths I learned that Cassie was the owner of the apartment building, an investment made as part of her overall "retirement" fund. Mr. Rui had some hand in the purchase, but it was unknown to what extent. Given the length of time she had worked for him I wasn't surprised that their relationship extended to other things beyond work.

That one investment led to others and got her looking towards Real Estate as a way out.

The time spent with Cassie gradually dampened one aspect of my infatuation. The more I knew of her the more I admired. I guess the fantasy was being stripped away in favor of the woman, and it in turn began to affect our working relationship. Watching her dance as a friend was very, very different then seeing her perform while we were only coworkers.

At first my behavior began to border on some form of jealousy. I was more snappish with the clients, less tolerant of the stray remark during a gig, and more protective and aggressive in general. Cassie asked me to lighten up on several occasions. I never created a scene but some of our shows were tense and I was the source of that tension.

My temperament carried over into other areas and relationships as well. One Sunday a week before Christmas, I snapped at Gary. It was over something trivial and I apologized almost immediately. Adrienne and Ari were nearby when it happened but Gary and I left the house before anyone else could become involved.

Outside he went straight to the point.

"Are you hung up on this woman David?"

"What do you mean? What's that got to do with anything?" I responded, knowing full well his question.

"C'mon, I'm talking about Cassie. You haven't even mentioned her name but you're acting like something's bothering you. Sounds like a woman to me and the only one we've talked about in the past is her. What gives?"

I opened up to him after that. I didn't know what my feelings were about Cassie. It was complicated. The attraction wasn't overtly sexual; those feelings had been submerged and ended months ago as I got to know her. Yet, it couldn't help but be somewhat sexual. The closest I could figure was that her dancing bothered me. It was a matter of being possessive yet it wasn't. Of course that made no sense to me but Gary went with it anyway.

"Maybe you're too close to her. You say she doesn't have many friends. You've been talking to her quite a lot haven't you?"

"We see each other usually on Saturdays...for the job. During the week we talk maybe once every couple of days. That's not that often."

Gary raised an eyebrow then paused for a while, measuring his words before he spoke.

"What do you talk about?"

"Nothing much, things in general: our childhoods, our families, some of our plans for the future, that kind of stuff. Mostly she does the talking. She doesn't show it, but she's scared Gary. She wants to leave the business but she's unsure. You know she's studied real estate, even purchased a couple of properties, but she's afraid of making a real go of it."

"And you're going to help her how?" Gary said, looking bemused.

"Yeah, sounds crazy doesn't it? I don't know how, but somehow I know I'm going to help her move on."

"Back up my friend. You're getting in too deep. She's what, in her early thirties?

She has more resources than you, more experience too. You're taking on a responsibility that is not yours. You can sympathize with her but beyond that you're dreaming."

"I suppose you're right, but I still can't accept it. It's been bothering me for months."

"I thought you weren't going to get personally involved with these women? Whatever happened to 'being detached'?

I couldn't look at him when he said that. Over the year, that detachment went out the window as I sought the only intimacy available to me, or so Serena had said earlier when she and I had a similar conversation. Still I needed to tell him.

"They talk to me. Not just Cassie, all of them. It was a research project when we started. It really was, or at least I thought it was. But you can't restrict the talk to only the business. When we're alone in the car they tell me their problems. I mainly just listen, but sometimes..."

Gary sat there silent as I explained how I had managed to get myself so entangled in my passengers lives. Part of what I told him was a revelation to me too. It was surprising to both of us how much I knew, how much of the minutiae of their lives lived in my memories of them.

Somehow I had not dared look at some of my actions from another perspective. These women were more than co-workers, and that was the problem; their status was unclear. Were they friends? That answer came quickly. They were, and it was the cost of that friendship that was the real concern.

Nothing was settled that night, though I had a lot to think about. For all of my encouragement of Cassie, it came to me that I too might have a hard time leaving the business.

Chapter 10: Two Degrees of Freedom

In February I received a call from Albert asking me to come in a few hours earlier than the beginning of my shift. It was a nasty day out, cold with yesterday's snow still on the ground. When I arrived Albert barely gave me time to remove my coat before ushering me into the employee lounge.

Albert and I normally exchanged some minor ribbing when we met. Not this time. That day he was all business. My stomach started doing flip flops. I fully expected Rui to be waiting to sack me. I couldn't think of anything I had done wrong, except maybe my attitude recently, but why else would I be a witness to Albert's somber secrecy?