Battle-Hardened, War Weary Ch. 07

He stood on the second step of the staircase and listened for more noise. He didn't have to wait too long because a few seconds later, he heard it again. The noise was the sound of mewling. He compared the noise to the sound of a small animal like a kitten or a puppy. The mewling stopped and then a cry filtered the air. Daniel had entered the hallway and he figured out that the crying came from the middle bedroom.

The bedroom's door was slightly opened. A ray of sunlight shone through the cracks in the door and into the hallway. There was a colorful and juvenile-looking clown decoration on the door. He pushed the door open and stood in the doorway. He gazed into the nursery, at the white crib and listened to Sean's cries. His heart began to race while the muscles in his stomach tensed up.

'Oh my God, he is in there. Oh my God,' he said to himself. He sighed. 'I wonder what he looks like. He—

"That's Sean."

'Oh shit,' his brain yelped.

Daniel turned his focus away from the crib and stared at the little boy who was on the other side of the bedroom. Daniel's body did a subtle flinch due from being surprised. He didn't notice the little boy.

The child sat on the edge of a small bed. Daniel assumed that the child must've woken up from his nap. He was dressed in a white short-sleeved shirt that held stains and a few holes, a pair of tattered brown cargo shorts and a pair of white socks. For Daniel, the boy appeared to be around the age of four years old. His skin was the shade of a medium brown. He had a pair of round, dark brown eyes and a pair of dimples that was deep. The large man thought the kid was adorable.

Daniel smiled at the child. "Yeah, I know." He entered the bedroom and stood a few feet away from the doorway.

"My name is Kassim," the boy announced with a smile and as he pointed to his chest.

Daniel chuckled. "My name is Daniel, but you can call me 'Danny'."

Kassim hopped off of his bed and walked up to Daniel. He extended his left hand in front of him. "Please to meet you, Sir."

Daniel stared down at the kid and then at his hand. He was impressed with the manners that this kid was showing to him. He smiled as he grabbed a hold of the little boy's hand. The two individuals shook hands.

"It's nice to meet you Kassim."

Kassim removed his hand from Daniel's grip and he walked towards the crib. He stood by the railing and leaned against it while staring at Daniel. "So, are you here for Sean?" the boy asked.

"Yeah," Daniel said to him as he walked over to the crib.

He stared into the crib and gazed at the newborn babe. The baby was awake. He was fussy and was fidgeting around. He was lightly cried. Daniel took note of the baby's honey-colored skin and curly, dark blonde hair. His cherubic-styled face was moist with tears. His brow was wrinkled and his deep set eyes focused on Daniel's face.

Daniel stared at the baby and felt his body undergo a transformation. The headache disappeared. The ache in his stomach rippled for a few waves and then the feeling disappeared. He felt as if the infant boy was the cure for his ailments.

'What the hell is wrong with me?'

The tips of his fingers began to tingle. He rubbed his fingertips together in hoped of getting rid of the weird sensation. He felt an urge to touch the infant and hold him. The feeling was strong.

"Pick him up; he'll stop crying if you pick him up," suggested Kassim. "Sean likes it when he is being hold."

Daniel reached into the crib and taken a hold of the infant. He lifted the baby out of the bed and brought him close to his chest. He stared down at the baby. A strong shudder swam through Daniel's body that caused to let out a whimper. He began to pace in the bedroom. He began to breathe heavily. He felt hot. The room felt very stuffy to him. He felt a gamut of emotions: shame, cluelessness, fear, happiness and then he ended up feeling contentment.

The sense of shame was the result of realizing that he also deserted Sean as well and not just Mary Anne. The acknowledgement caused Daniel to tear up. He felt cluelessness because he didn't know how to take care of a baby. He didn't anything about the act of fathering. But, he was going to do it anyway because he wanted to take care of this child. He was fearful because he knew the being a single parent was going to be tough for him. He didn't want to make any devastating mistakes while he raised Sean. On the other side of the coin, he felt happy that he was going to be able to raise this wonderful boy.

Daniel stopped pacing and he stood in the middle of the room. Then he felt complete and utter contentment. He gazed at Sean. The baby boy stopped crying and now glared at him. Daniel noticed that his eyes were a dark shade of green. He chuckled when he realized that the body shared the same eye color with his mother, grandmother, grand-aunt and his deceased brother.

'Yeah, he is definitely going to fit in fine with the family.'

This time, he didn't see the son of Mary Anne and the reminder of her extra-marital affair. Now, he gazed at his son. He bent his head down and gave Sean's scalp a kiss.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into his son's hair. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry..."

Dawn had arrived and the sun sat in the middle of the sky. Daniel traveled off of the porch and strolled down the long, asphalt-paved road that led off of the property. He held Sean in his arms as he casually walked. He talked to his son. He told the sleeping newborn stories about certain events from his childhood. He told a tale about an injury incident that occurred during his football career. He told a compelling story about enduring the pain of having a broken pinky toe, when he saw a cherry red, 1999 Ford F-150 turn onto the road. The truck drove down the road and came to a stop, a few feet in front of Daniel. He walked over to the driver's side of the truck. He stared at the woman who sat in the driver's seat.

Just like the time that she was at Costello's, Abigail wore an outfit that would garner anyone's attention. Abigail did not dress like an average grandmother or behave like the average one either. She wore a black, leather Stetson on her head. A plaid-printed, buttoned down shirt with a tight, black tank top underneath that highlighted her bust. Her shoulder-length, gray-silver hair was free. On her diamond-shaped face, she wore minimal makeup: a few coats of pink lip gloss on her lips and black eyeliner lined the rims of her deep set eyes.

"Good morning Papa!" greeted his great-aunt Abigail with a cheerful smile on her face. She glanced down at Sean's sleeping face. She swooned. "Look at that handsome little guy, Danny, he is so adorable!"

Daniel smiled. "Good morning, Aunt Abigail. How are you this morning?"

"I am feeling great, honey," she said to him. She gazed at her grand-nephew. An expression of concern grew on her face. "You, on the other hand, look like shit," she commented.

Daniel gave his great-aunt a grin. "Awww Abigail, you always know what to say to a man to boost his ego!"

She gave a wry smile. "I hope your kid doesn't get your taste in sarcasm," she informed him. "Do you want a ride back to the house?" Daniel nodded his head. "Well, get in, boys!"

Daniel entered the cabin of the vehicle. He held onto the baby. Aunt Abigail placed her foot on the gas pedal. The car began to move. He stared out of the windshield and stared at the large farmhouse that was coming into view. Then he stared at the vast land that surrounded the house. A shiver ran down his spine, when he realized that he will be leaving this beautiful place in two days. The Juggernauts' training camp was going to start in five days and he needed to be present at the training camp facilities in four days. He knew the he was going to miss this place.

"I am going to miss this place," stated Daniel as he stared out the windshield.

"Well, this place is sure going to miss you, baby" she informed him as she continued to drive down the road. "And we're going to miss you too."

Daniel blushed and stared down at his son. He heard his grandmother's sister laugh at him. He glanced over at her.

"I see that your grandmother isn't the only one who cannot handle receiving compliments," she said to him. She watched as his cheeks grew darker in color. She cackled. Then a comfortable silence entered the vehicle. "Before we arrived to the house, I want to tell you something," she suddenly informed him. "I just want to say that I am proud of you for raising Sean."

"Aunt—

"No, let me finish," stated his great-aunt. "I just want to say that I am proud of you for taking care of Sean. A lot of men, who have been in your experience or will have a similar experience, will leave in a heartbeat. They will leave and they won't look back. Trust me, I know from my own experience. I believe one-half of the men, who does stay around will act like bastards. There are some men out there, who are mean and have no problem mistreating their wives' or girlfriends' kids. A lot of men are uncomfortable with being fathers to children that doesn't belong to them. I don't know why. Maybe..." Abigail let out a deep sigh. "Maybe it's because of biology and nature that makes the men uncomfortable. Well, I am proud of you for doing it."

Daniel stared down at the floor of the cabin and then back out of the window. "Well..." Daniel gave his sleeping son a glimpse. "... Thank you, Aunt Abigail. I appreciate the words." His hands gave his son's waist a gentle squeeze. Daniel did not believe that it was impossible for not being able to love Sean. He did feel love for that little boy since he was surviving in his mom's belly.

"Have Mary Anne called you lately?" asked Abigail.

The mention of his ex-wife's name caused Daniel's ire to rise. Then, he silently cursed at himself for feeling that way about her.

"No, I haven't spoken to her since we had that 'divorce-mediation meeting'. Now, the only time we communicate is through our lawyers," he informed his great-aunt.

It has been a month since the last time he saw her. He has been trying to forgive her since the day that he returned to Arkansas with Sean. After all, she was the woman who was wholly responsible for creating the most important person in his life. Plus, he knew that he about his role in being a catalyst in her affair. Plus, he knew that if he were to place all of the blame on Mary Jane, he would've been a liar and a hypocrite. He knew that he wasn't the best husband during their marriage.

Abigail clucked her teeth in pity. "Mmm, such a shame, I believe that you guys should've gone through this amicably, instead of how it had gone."

"Well, Mary Anne should've just accepted the divorce settlement and allow our annulment to become finalized quicker. Instead, she kept being hard-headed—

"No, she was acting like a wife who wanted to make her failing marriage work," Abigail pointed out. Daniel noticed the edge that was in his great-aunt's voice. She was annoyed. "She wanted to continue to—

"To lie to me and make our shitty relationship work for the sake of the cameras?"

Abigail slapped him on the back of his head. The young man flinched. She drove her truck off of the road and parked. She turned off the ignition. She unbuckled her seat belt and then she turned in her seat to face her great-nephew. She watched Daniel as rubbed the pain out of the back of his scalp.

"Ow, what-the-fuck, Abigail?" he gasped.

Abigail pinched the large man on his thick arm. He flinched again and then glared at her. She pointed her right, index finger in his face.

"You listen to me and you listen to me good, boy! All in all, I think that you're a good man. And in regards to Mary Anne, I think she is a good woman. Both of you two are two good people, who have done very bad things to each other. I understand how hurt you are about her act of cheating, but you have to keep one thing in mind: You didn't love her! And you cheated on her as well! You never did love Mary Anne! You knew that you didn't love Mary Anne, way before you proposed marriage—

"I did—

"Boy, don't you dare lie to me," stated Abigail. She let out a breath. "You proposed marriage, even though you didn't love her. You married her, even though you did not love her. Why? I don't know. And I don't care. But what you need to know is that Mary Anne loved you. She loved your big, giant ass! I know, in my heart, that she loved you. I don't care for the girl, you know that fact. But I do appreciate that she loved you. She wasn't a gold-digger or some up-and-coming actress who was dating you to make a name and a reputation. She was a woman that fell in love with you." Abigail settled deeper into her seat.

Daniel now understood why Abigail was upset. She was aware that Daniel didn't love Mary Anne, but continued to 'play games' with her.

"If she loved me, she wouldn't have cheated on me..."

He knew that it was petty and childish of him to throw that tidbit out there, but he didn't want to be the only selfish jerk that was called out by his aunt.

"And you cheated on her as well," counterpointed Abigail.

"...And lied to me about the true identity of Sean's father!"

Abigail and Daniel stared at each other. There was tension and it gradually filled the cabin of the Ford F-150.

"Let me tell you something, Danny: women love stability. We are taught since we're little girls to achieve stability. It doesn't matter in regards to race, culture and creed; all women want a sense of stability. With that being said, a woman will do what she has to do, in order to maintain what she has," she explained to him. "This is why Mary Anne continued to lie to you. She wanted to maintain her lifestyle of an honorable, married woman. She wanted to maintain her reputation of being a God-fearing, virtuous woman who has morals. She also wanted to make sure that you remained loving her..." Abigail shifted in her seat. "... Unbeknownst to her, you didn't love her at all."

"I did love her," mumbled Daniel.

"Are we going to have this conversation about your love for Mary Anne again?" Abigail asked even though it was rhetorical inquiry. "All right, let's say that you did have love for the girl, you didn't have the same type of love for Mary Anne like the type of love that you have for that Kali gal."

Daniel stared at his aunt. In return, she stared at him. He could see in her bright green eyes that she was waiting for him to challenge that accusation. He wanted to give Abigail a rebuttal, but he knew that it would be pointless. There was no point in lying to a clairvoyant. He focused on the scenery that was outside of the car.

With the mention of Kali, Daniel began to think about her. He hasn't seen her in over six months. The last time he physically saw her was at his former in-laws' house, at their holiday party. Then, the last time he had contact from his former lover was a little bit over a month ago. He received a letter in the mail from her. The letter was addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. Daniel Logan" and she had written his old residence's address on the envelope. Luckily, the letter along with his other mail was forwarded to his grandparents' home. He learned that she also sent an invitation as well. He read the invitation first.

Daniel knew, from judging the cover of the card, that the invitation was involving a wedding ceremony. The card was crème-colored and was made from special paper. A silk, black ribbon ran down the center of the cover. A ceramic, oval-shaped plaque was positioned in the center of the ribbon. On the plaque, were black calligraphy-styled letters 'R' and 'K'.

Knowing that Kali, his first and only love, was getting married to another man made him feel disappointed. He wasn't devastated. He was slightly surprised about the fact that he didn't feel emotionally terrible. It was at that moment that he realized that his love for Kali had changed. He still loved her, but he wasn't in love with her anymore. When he thought about her, his heart didn't pound and his gut didn't feel like World War 3 had erupted from the inside.

He opened the card and read the contents that were inside of the invitation. "You are formally invited to witness the union of Ryan Whittler and Kali Richardson as they are joined in holy matrimony..."

He was stunned. He re-read the card's contents and hoped that he read the wrong name of the groom. Once Daniel realized that she was indeed marrying Ryan Whittler, he grew angry. He assumed that she was being forced into being legally bound to his former best friend. Daniel knew that Kali was a very kind person yet she was vulnerable and was capable of being mistreated by others. He knew Ryan was the type of person who would enjoy having another person to manipulate and inflict pain on. After reading the invitation's contents, he felt the need to speak to her. He wanted to convince her that she was about to make a mistake.

Then, Daniel remembered about the second thing that she added in the envelope. He unfolded the sheet of loose leaf paper that she added. He read the letter. In her letter, she addressed both Mary Anne and him. She gave updates about her life. She discussed how she was in love with Ryan. She made mention about Ryan's improvements in his character and mental health. She didn't elaborate about the tools that he was using. She also announced that she was pregnant and she was going to be a mother to a daughter. Then, she ended her letter asking for Daniel and Mary Anne to attend her wedding, despite their ill opinions of her fiancée.

"Your grandma told me that your girlfriend had sent you a wedding invitation," Abigail told him.

"Yeah," he said, glumly. He continued to stare out of the window. "She is married to a guy who used to be my best friend. The wedding was four days ago."

"Ouch," she said before sighing. "Despite that tidbit, I hope they have a long and healthy marriage."

"I hope so too, for her sake."

After their conversation, Abigail and Daniel arrived to the house. His grandmother finished with the preparation of breakfast, by the time they entered the farmhouse. The three adults ate their meals and conversed in the meantime. After the meals were finished and the dishes were cleaned, they prepared for the trip into Porter. Daniel had gone to his bedroom to prepare Sean for the trip. An hour later, Tin, Delia and Abigail was packing items into Tin's SUV.

"All right Papa, we have to go now," announced Abigail as she sat in the backseat of the vehicle. She did an occasional chuckle as she gazed at her great-nephew, who stood on the other side of the vehicle. She watched Daniel stand in the space that was in between the SUV's back door and the car. His upper body was inside of the car while his lower body remained on the outside. He was hovering over the car seat that rested on the other side of the backseat, the area that was behind the driver seat. "Sean is going to be fine."

Daniel gave his great-aunt Abigail a glimpse and then he resumed inspecting his son. He also continued to inspect the straps that were keeping the car seat in place. He wanted to make sure that the chair will not come loose during the trip.

"I know," he muttered. "I just want to make sure..." He stared at his son, who was asleep. "That everything is going to be okay."

"Everything is all right, son. Now, let's us get on the road before the traffic becomes heavy," his grandfather stated as he sat in the driver's seat.

"Okay," stated Daniel. He gave his son a kiss on his forehead. He gazed at his son for a minute. Then he began acting out another inspection.

"DANIEL," all three of the car's adult-inhabitants said, collectively.

"Okay," he said to them. He backed away from his son. He slipped his massive upper body out of the car and then closed the door as gentle as possible. He stared into the car's window, at his son while he slowly backed away from the car.