Be True to Yourself

I've always believed in speaking my mind. If I think it, I say it. This aspect of my personality seems to get on a lot of anal retentive people's nerves. Honestly though, I don't give a flying fuck if they like what I say or not. Whether I'm speaking my mind in public or filling my erotic stories with rambling thoughts, one thing never varies. It is always spoken from the heart.

Nothing gets on my nerves more then people who are fakes. You know the ones I'm talking about. The people who act all prissy and sophisticated out in public who pretend they've never had a dirty thought much less had sex! They look down their noses at people who like to watch porno movies or look at nudie magazines.

But, behind closed doors it's a whole other ballgame. They are just normal everyday people like me and you. They cuss, fuck, eat pussy, suck cock and masturbate. Hidden in the top of their closets are piles of XXX rated movies and adult magazines they've been collecting since they were pimply faced teenagers.

Often times these are the people who we see on television talking about how pornography should be banned. They dish out their 'holier then thou' attitude, like we are really going to listen and immediately gather up our prized collections of naughty items to burn. I wish people like that would just 'GET REAL'. Obviously they are undersexed and need to invest in some kinky sex toys. Somebody really needs to tell them to get off of their high horses, bend over and stick a dildo up their asses!

When I was growing up, I was so shy and timid that I would let anyone walk all over me before I would even think of standing up for myself. Eventually, I got tired of it and started speaking my mind. I learned to use my free thinking ways creatively.

I started writing stories my first year of college. At first all I wrote was comedy which earned me many laughs from my professors. My ability to make people laugh with my words was the spark that lit the flame inside my soul which enables me to write about any subject whether it's passionate sex or death.

The ability to talk about anything to anyone, friend or foe, without embarrassment took a lot of work on my part. The funny thing about it is that I never fully overcame my shy streak until I started using the internet which is one of the main things that those anal retentive assholes want to censor.

I have seen the affect many of the stories on Literotica have on people. Not just the physical reactions, but the internal ones they feel. I believe that if my stories can make a person, smile, frown, and cry or become aroused, then I've done a good job expressing myself. Reading what people think about my stories always inspires me to write more. Unfortunately, this past year I haven't written anything until this past week. No stories, no letters, no emails, absolutely nothing.

During this time, instead of saying what I'm feeling or using my writing as a release, I have built a stone wall around my heart. I have had no inspiration to write a word. A lot of this is because my mother is fighting an advanced case of Parkinson's disease at a relatively young age.

I have sat here the last year, wondering how to get past this pain. For the first time in many years, I haven't known how to say what I'm feeling. I'm pissed off because nobody deserves to have a disease like this. The problem is that I've had no idea where to vent my anger so I locked all my feelings up inside. This ultimately caused my writers block.

This last week, I finally got sick of feeling this way. I sat down in front of the computer and told myself that I am going to start writing again, come hell or high water. I knew that the time had come that I needed to vocalize all these mixed feelings inside me, including a lot of sexual frustration, or I just might spontaneously explode!

Even though all this time has passed since I last posted a story, I still receive regular e-mails from fans of my writing. The kind words from readers have helped me to not forget that my words do make a difference to people out there.

Now that I have found my strength to go on with life once again, I have to promise myself to never stray from my beliefs again. I will say or write what is on my mind everyday, even if I just say it to myself because if I let life get me down again, then I'm not being true to myself which is exactly what those good for nothing censors want all of us to do. Just remember, sometimes you've got to shrug your shoulders, stand up and shout "What the FUCK!?!" and do or say what you damn well please!

Handy phrases to say to people who try to censor your free speech rights:

1. Fuck you and the horse you road in on!
2. Eat shit and die!
3. Drop your shitty attitude and go get fucked!
4. Abstinence isn't working for you is it?
5. Do I need to call a tow truck to remove the corn cob from your ass?
6. Who died and made you Queen Bitch?
7. Who died and made you King of the Assholes?
8. This is the 21st century so why don't you go back to 1955?
9. That Venereal Disease is really starting to rot your brain.
10. If you get anymore frigid, you're going to start shitting ice cubes!

Handy ideas that will aggravate people who try to censor your free speech rights:

1. Put a sign in your front yard that says: PROUD PORN ADDICT LIVES HERE!
2. Wear t-shirts with racy slogans on them, like: Erotic Writers do it better!
3. Cover the bumper of your car with naughty stickers.
4. Get a sexy tattoo and make it a point to show it to EVERYONE you meet.
5. Tell dirty jokes/stories in a loud voice in restaurants and stores.
6. Start a naughty book club in your neighborhood. Hang flyers advertising it all over town.
7. Hang a sign on your front door that says: "If you hear squeaking springs, moaning and screaming, please come back in 6 hours!"
8. Have a garage sale and put a box to the side that is labeled: SEX TOYS, NOT FOR SALE, I HAVEN'T WORN OUT THE BATTERIES YET, where everyone can see it.
9. Add to your porn video and magazine collection every time you go shopping.
10. Most important of all, NEVER, stop reading or writing erotica for Literotica so that there will always be something new for free speech believers to read.

If you can speak your mind out loud or on paper, without worrying about what anyone else is thinking, then you have beat censorship and are being true to yourself...