Black Friday/Cyber Mondaybypatientlee©
This is my Winter Holidays Story Contest 2013 entry. Vote, if you like.
Sincere thanks to my beta readers/proofreaders, Privates1stclass and SecondCircle. It's a better story because of their assistance.
Barb put the dishes in the sink, but decided to wait until later to wash them. She wrinkled her nose at the sticky pecan pie plate, but figured that soaking it was the way to go. There were sales circulars to be devoured, planning to be done. "Black Friday comes but once a year," she thought to herself. She wiped her hands on the towel, fluffed her mousy, brown hair, and joined the other girls at the dining room table.
This was the third year that her friends had gathered for Thanksgiving dessert to prepare to attack the Black Friday sales in the morning. All six of them had lived together in the duplex on River Drive when they went to the university. Barb, Robin and Emilia shared the left side of the house, and Rocco, Dwayne and Todd lived on the right.
After graduation Barb got a job as a speech therapist at a local nursing home, and she continued to live in the duplex while the rest of the group scattered in different directions. At first they saw each other a couple of times a year, but with jobs and hectic lives, their visits had already been reduced to their once-a-year shopping weekend, starting with Thanksgiving dessert.
"I'm really surprised all three of them came this year," Robin remarked as Barb took the stack of sales ads and placed them on the freshly cleared dining room table. "It must be your amazing pecan pie, Em. It can't be because they just love to shop with us so much."
"I know, right?" Emilia said. Emilia was half Puerto Rican and completely gorgeous. With long, dark curls that reached to the top of her shapely buttocks, a slim waist and large, full breasts, she exuded sexuality. She was usually bossy, sometimes bitchy, and she thought her shit was ice cream. Most people were surprised to find out that she was a second grade teacher, given her abrasive personality, but she had a soft side that only little kids and her best friends could bring out in her. "It must be the pie. Those morons don't know a good deal when it smacks them in the face."
Robin, a registered nurse, was the peacemaker of the group. "Guys don't like to shop. I'm just glad they still want to hang out with us." Robin was a little ditzy and had a dry sense of humor, which left strangers to wonder if she was dumb or joking. Years of competitive tennis gave her an almost masculine physique, except for her nearly perfect tits which she displayed with low-cut tops most of the time. They drew men to her like mosquitoes to a bug zapper, the electric zap coming when she let them know that she was gay. Didn't stop them from trying though.
"Are we all set for tomorrow?" Robin asked. "What's the plan?"
"Just like last year," Barb said. "We leave for the mall at three in the morning. The guys help us carry stuff for a couple of hours, and then they do what they need to do."
"Yeah. Last year they needed to sit at the bar at TGIFriday's for two hours," Emilia said. "We couldn't find them when we were ready to leave."
"This year we have a time limit," Barb reminded them. "The Bruins and the Rangers play at one. We have to leave by noon in order to make it back on time."
"But what about the contest? I forget," Robin said.
Barb explained it again for Robin, trying not to roll her eyes. "We shop from four until noon. Whoever saves the largest percentage of what they spend wins the wreath."
"Dwayne!" Emilia called. "Where's the wreath?"
"It's in my car," he yelled back from the living room. "You'll see it tomorrow when you declare your winner."
The Black Friday prize was a fresh Christmas wreath, handmade by Dwayne's mother. She worked for a florist, and each year the wreath was more stunning than the last. Barb was last year's winner, and as the self-proclaimed savviest shopper, she planned to win again.
Monday's contest was less cut and dry. Cyber Monday's prize was bragging rights only, and the winner was voted on by the guys. The goal was to find the coolest, most unique, most outrageous gift possible. Cost wasn't a factor. It just had to be cool and available online. Last year Emilia had found a table-top banana tree for her uncle in Queens. She was the uncontested winner.
The guys were huddled around the TV, watching the end of the Cowboys and Raiders game. Todd and Dwayne weren't huge football fans, but Todd was killing time until the girls got down to business with the sales ads. He had an idea, but he didn't want the girls to know.
As soon as Todd heard Robin ask for the Target ad, he knew it was time. He drew Dwayne and Rocco into a huddle.
"We're all set for our little contest tomorrow too," Todd said.
"How did you do it?" Rocco asked.
"I put an ad on Craig's List," Todd said. He placed a print out of the ad on the coffee table.
M4W for Sexy Music Video (23)—D&D free. You must be too. Audition at the mall on Black Friday. Must be 18 to 29 and willing to record audition on video. You think of a good location in the mall to record a BJ or anything else that happens. Send a pic and stats. Put "audition" in the subject line so I know you're real. Any race, but you must be hot. (No offense to girls who aren't hot.)
"You put that on Craig's List?" Dwayne said. "And you think it's going to work?"
"Already did. I got three responses. One for each of us. We're meeting next to Santa's Land at seven o'clock in the morning," Todd said. "The girls are supposed to come up with the scenario and for the 'audition', but it wouldn't hurt for us think about it in advance too."
"You got girls to agree to have sex in the mall?" Dwayne asked. "I don't fucking believe it."
"Buddy, I'm just that good," Todd said.
"So, how is this a contest?" Rocco asked.
"Here's how it works. We meet the girls. We go our separate ways. We find someplace private, and have sex with them. Take video. They know we need to record it.
"What these lovely ladies don't know is that we're submitting them to a porn site," Todd said with a wicked grin.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Rocco said. He still had an eye on the football game. He was actually a Vikings fan, but he had played football in high school, and any game drew his interest. "Everybody knows that amateur porn just means 'pros with bad lighting'."
"Not this site. I've already tried it," Todd said, flashing a big grin.
"You posted a video of you having sex," Rocco said. "I don't buy it. Show me."
"You don't wanna see it. It's just me jerking off."
"Oh, god. You had to plant that image in my head. You're disgusting," Rocco said.
"Anyway, this is the Cyber Monday part. We'll post the videos on my account, and whichever video has the highest rating at eight o'clock P.M. on Cyber Monday wins. Simple as that," said Todd.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Dwayne asked, his face contorted with confusion and surprise.
"Dude. Sex in the mall? Are you nuts?" Rocco finally spoke.
"Dude. Why not? It's not like we've never done anything like this before," Todd said.
"Yeah, but that was in college. We have jobs now. We're a little old to be fucking in public, just for kicks," Rocco added. "And besides. We're going to the mall in the morning. Too early to drink first."
"Don't be pussies. It'll be fun. It's a contest, for Christ's sake," Todd said.
"So what do we win?" Rocco asked. "Please tell me that Dwayne's mother isn't donating another wreath."
"Nah, we have to put up some money at the beginning. Fifty bucks apiece? Winner takes all," Todd said.
"Make it a hundred and I'm in," Rocco said. "Gotta make it worth the risk."
"That's easy for you to say, Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome. I don't have a chance at getting this girl to fuck me, and you two both know it," Dwayne protested. "You've probably had sex with half the girls that will be at the mall anyway, and Todd, you've got that Brad Pitt thing going on there. Hell, you could tell girls that you're the guy from that motorcycle show on FX, and they'd fall to their knees and blow you right next to the mall Santa.
"I, on the other hand, have been blessed with this Rat Face of mine. Who the fuck is going to agree to have sex with me? Fifty bucks is my limit."
Dwayne had dealt with the nickname "Rat Face" since elementary school. His face was long and slender, ending in a pointed chin on which he grew a smudge of dark facial hair. His nose was long and a little bit crooked, and his dark eyes seemed too large for the rest of his face. His head sported a mess of brown, unruly curls, and even after years of braces, his front teeth were larger than the rest of his teeth, giving him the smile of a rodent.
It wasn't as though he had never had a girlfriend before. He had a steady girlfriend through high school, and had managed to get laid a couple of times in college. He just didn't bank on the idea that some random Craig's List girl was going to fuck him, even if she did want to be in a music video.
"Alright. Fifty bucks," Todd agreed. Rocco nodded. Dwayne reluctantly stuck out his hand to shake, and the others followed suit.
Todd went to the kitchen to get another round of beers. He stopped in the dining room and looked at the girls. He wondered if this was the last year that the whole crew would be together. All of the guys were single, but Emilia had gotten engaged in the last year, and Robin had been with the same partner for a year and a half now.
Barb was the only one of the bunch that was currently unattached. She was, as she liked to say, "chunky, but spunky." She was the one that made everyone laugh, even when it was at her own expense. When she worked with elderly stroke victims at the nursing home, her effervescent personality and self-deprecating jokes could make the grumpiest old man smile.
Todd thought back to their college days when he had a little crush on Emilia. One night after a successful party in the guys' half of the duplex that they shared with the girls, Todd and Emilia had been the last two still awake while everyone else had passed out, either on the living room floor, or in the guys' bedrooms. They had been drinking too, of course, and when Emilia got ready to go next door to her own room, Todd stopped her.
"Wan me ta walk ya home?" he had slurred.
"You're way drunker than I am, and across the porch is a pretty short walk," she replied.
He reached for her hand. "But there's somebody sleepin' in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?"
"Sorry, Buddy. I'll be sleeping in my bed, and I share a room with Barb. I don't think she wants to hear you snore."
"OK. Mebbe I don wanna sleep. Mebbe we can fool around a lil," he said, as he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her close to him.
Emilia laughed, thinking it was just the liquor talking. "Well, you can walk me home and sleep on our couch, if you like. I see that yours is taken."
There were two guys neither of them knew sleeping on opposite ends of the couch. One still had his drink in his hand, so she pulled back from Todd to go get it before it spilled on the carpet. Todd didn't let go. He bent his head down to her face, and kissed her, gently at first. She parted her lips and allowed Todd's tongue into her mouth. He tasted like beer.
The kiss lasted for a long time. When she relaxed a bit, Todd let go of his grip on her waist and let his hand slide down to her buttocks. He gave her butt a little squeeze, making her squeal softly. He brought the other hand to her face and stroked her cheek. Emilia smiled up at him, knowing that Todd was too drunk to take this much further.
She kissed him one more time, and pulled away from him. "Todd, you're drunk. Let's not do anything we'll regret in the morning, OK? C'mon. You can sleep on my couch. Just let me grab that guy's drink before it ends up on the carpet."
Todd smiled at the memory and brought the beers back to the living room.
On the way to the mall, Dwayne's stomach churned as his thoughts raced. Sure, they had done some crazy-ass things in college, but they were usually drunk, and so were the girls, for Christ's sake. "How the fuck am I going to convince a stranger to fuck me?" he said to himself. "I should just bow out of this nonsense, but I'll never hear the end of it from these two."
Other doubts were creeping in for Dwayne as well. Casual sex in college was one thing, but they were adults now. There were times now when he looked back on some of the stupid shit they did back in the day, and he actually felt guilty. Lying to women to have sex and take video of it? That was just disrespectful to women. They were adults. They should know better.
They arrived at the mall, parking next to the girls. The parking lot was already pretty full. Todd reached into the glove compartment, and pulled out a handful of condoms for each of them.
"Dude, I'm gonna need a couple more, just in case," Rocco said with a grin. He was pretty sure that he had this contest in the bag.
"Here. Take mine," Dwayne said, only half-kidding. "It's not likely that I'll actually need them."
They joined the girls and went to the back of the line of people waiting to rush the doors as soon as the stores opened. The girls passed out the Dunkin Donuts and coffee while they waited.
As soon as the serious-looking security guards in the Santa hats opened the doors, the crowd ran forward toward the most coveted merchandise, beginning an orgy of retail hedonism. A couple of less experienced shoppers were knocked to the ground in the flood of crazed deal searchers, but no one seemed to notice. Men and women alike hooted and hollered, and tempers flared right from the start.
Todd found himself in a fight with a white-haired grandmother in an ugly Christmas sweater over the pocket-sized video camera that he needed. Without it, he wouldn't be able to shoot any video, disqualifying him from the contest that he invented himself.
"Lady, I need this camera," he snarled.
"Too bad. I saw it first," she argued, trying to push him back with her pink camouflage cane.
"It was in my hand first, Grandma." Todd knew that he wouldn't look back on this as one of his prouder moments, but he snatched the camera out of the woman's arthritic hands, and ran toward the checkout. The camera was the only item he was looking for that morning, and once he had paid for it, he was ready to move on with his real objective for the day.
He walked away with his purchase, whistling "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" and looking for the girls.
After two hours of shopping with the girls, the guys made their excuses and slipped off to meet their Craig's List ladies. They stood near the entrance to Santa's Land, phones in hand, looking for the girls in the pictures from Todd.
"Dude, did you send pictures of yourself to them?" Dwayne asked.
"Nah. They don't care who they're having sex with. They're just here for the 'audition'." Todd said.
"Good thing. Wouldn't want this to be a bait and switch," Dwayne said. "I'd hate to be there when they find out that they were expecting Brad Pitt, but got Steve Buscemi."
"Ho, ho, ho," rang out from the North Pole behind them. All three turned to check out the elves in the skimpy costumes.
"Well, if these girls don't work out, maybe I'll just have to introduce myself to the Ho, Ho, Ho Squad," Rocco said.
"Yeah. Every elf wants herself some fireman love," Todd said. "What were you, June on the Firefighter-of-the-Month calendar?"
"July, dickhead," Rocco said.
"One smoldering gaze from you, and the girls' clothes fall right off," Dwayne said, rolling his eyes.
"So, what did you tell them about this video?" Rocco asked.
"Nothing. I told them to think about the scenario that displayed their talents the best and to think of a place in the mall to do that. That's it. You can tell them whatever you want. It's not like they're going to meet each other at a video shoot or anything," Todd said.
Rocco spotted his girl sitting on a bench in front of the Hallmark store, sipping an iced coffee. Her ultra-tight jeans and tittie-hugging t-shirt made her look just like a groupie that might appear in a music video. Her dark hair was tinted purple on the ends. Rocco wondered if she dyed it just for the audition.
He approached her from the left, but there was an artificial Christmas tree next to the bench, decorated with empty Hallmark boxes which blocked her view. She didn't notice him until he was standing directly in front of her, with his fly at her eye level. He was sure she didn't realize that she licked her lips before looking up to see his face.
"Lisa?" he asked. "I'm Rocco."
"That's me." She moved over to make room for him. "So you're a video producer?"
"Actually, I'm a firefighter."
"Really?" The high pitch of her voice revealed just how exciting she thought that was. "That's awesome. But why are you meeting me for the video then?"
He sat on an angle, allowing him to flex his hard abs in her direction. The tight, clingy Hollister t-shirt he wore gave Lisa a hint of what he was hiding underneath. Her eyes trailed downward, and they widened in delight when they rested on his lap. His long, thick cock and large testicles made a noticeable bulge in his jeans. Rocco's glance followed hers, and when her eyes met his again, she blushed.
"You caught me looking, Big Boy," she said. She leaned her head back in a dramatic display of faux embarrassment. "So tell me, Rocco. Are you a shower or a grower?"
"You'll find out, Baby."
"So, what's the deal with this video then?" she asked.
"My buddy is producing the video for a friend of ours. It's kind of a hard-core metal thing. The band's called the Porn Kings," he lied. "It will be pretty racy, but they're shooting on Monday, so I have to get this lined up today, if possible."
He went on. "And since it's the Porn Kings, the girls in the video will be giving blow jobs and having sex on the stage. They'll make more money depending on what they're willing to do. It won't be on TV or anything, just the internet."
Lisa smiled and licked her lips again. "Well, I have an idea of where we can do this. You got your camera?"
"Yeah. Right here. Let me just go check in with my buddies over there. I'll be right back." He walked back through the crowd, feeling Lisa's blue eyes on his ass as he went.
Dwayne was chewing on his lip, getting more anxious by the minute. He looked at his watch, wondering how much longer he had to stand there before he could just give up and go get a cup of coffee. It was only six-twenty-five. They weren't scheduled to meet until six-thirty. "Shit," he thought to himself.
"Do you suppose I can just skip this, and help the girls shop?" he asked. "This isn't my thing."
"C'mon, don't be a fuckin' pussy," Rocco said. "This won't be any fun unless we all do it."
"I mean, last year I helped Barb carry her stuff. She always buys things in these huge boxes..."
Todd cut him off. "Do what you want, man, but I think that's your girl over there." He pointed to a tall blonde with perky tits and long, stocking-clad legs near the lottery ticket kiosk. "Her name is Penny. Go talk to her."
Dwayne closed his eyes and bowed his head in exasperation. "Fine. I'll do it."
He began to trudge through the crowd, trying to catch her eye as he did. When he was almost close enough to talk to her, she met his gaze and wrinkled her nose. She looked away and resumed scanning the crowd.
Dwayne's heart sank. This was embarrassing, and he just wanted to go home. He turned abruptly against the flow of traffic and started walking away, giving up.
"I'll get her," Rocco said. "No sense wasting blonde pussy."