Bye Bye Blackberry

Richard loosened his tie and unbuttoned the top of his pinpoint Oxford shirt as the commuter train slowly approached the station. Streaks of yellow and orange foliage flitted by his window. He had no interest. He tugged on his necktie once more. The air in this railcar was always so stale, and he was subjected to it every night. Well, not every night. He occasionally got a Sunday off. Damn tie was so tight. His necktie was a noose, a noose hanging from the gallows that was his city-based office, which was about nothing these days but anemic sales, rocketing bottom lines, and layoffs.

In the station parking lot, Molly was standing by their Benz, waiting. Why was his wife at the station? Oh, yeah, the Halloween party. Richard had mentioned to Molly yesterday that he didn't have a costume. Molly had just smiled and said, "Let me take care of the costumes, sweetie." Richard was sure she was planning to get even for last year's costumes, which he had picked out. Most likely Richard would be showing some skin tonight. Good thing he hadn't been neglecting his visits to the gym. Jim? Dammit. He never replied to Jim's email. Richard pulled at his tie and yanked out his Blackberry.

*****

Molly saw Richard through the green tinted train car window. The 8:18 was on time, as always. He was pulling at his tie, AGAIN. Stressed out from work. Molly always told him the job and the money weren't important, but Richard wouldn't let up. It wasn't that she thought he wasn't listening. He just believed it was his job to provide for her. That Alpha Male thing. Molly loved Richard for it, but honestly, she didn't think he'd be happy until they had enough so that she would quit her kindergarten teacher job. Molly didn't want to quit. How could she not adore a job working with kids, finger painting, and playing hide-and-seek?

On the train, Richard was pounding away at his Blackberry, and when he finally noticed the train had stopped, he rose up out of his seat and grabbed his overcoat, all cocksure and graceful. Wowzie, she loved watching him move.

Molly's goal tonight was to make Richard forget all about work. She cast a gaze over her shoulder at the wardrobe bag on the back seat. It'll work. It has to work. She shifted uneasily in her jeans. Jeepers! How do men wear these boxer shorts all the time? The bunching up was distracting the heck out of Molly.

The boxers were all part of the costume, though. Last year Richard had picked the costumes, and the Harem Girl outfit he got for her had left her buns and boobies hanging out all over. Sure, her patootie had been hidden behind gauzy pantaloons, but she still felt almost naked in that velvet thong and matching brassiere. In front of all their friends, no less! And oh what fun the guys had with her. Even her girlfriends teased Molly straight through the holidays. Richard ate it all up, too. Easy for him. He had been in an all-concealing sheik's robe while Molly was on full display.

Molly smiled at the memory. She hadn't really minded all that much. She still had it going on, body-wise, and turning all those male heads had worked her up into quite the giddy buzz. It was a giddy buzz that she rode all the way home, where her sheik tossed her over his shoulder, carried her through the front door, past the living room, down the hall, and threw her down on their marital bed. He made love to her so hard and strong that after he exploded inside her she couldn't move her thighs for what seemed like hours. Now THAT was a night. They hadn't been able to return the Harem Girl costume. It was ripped to shreds.

"My, it's good to see you," Richard said. Molly stretched up to kiss him, grabbing his grapefruit biceps for balance. He gave her a hug, as if she'd just rescued him from the Titanic. Her face pressed against his powerful chest, Molly's nose filled with the last traces of his morning cologne almost completely overridden by his intoxicating man-sweat. Molly loved his strong embrace. That, more than anything else, was what she thought of as home.

"Tough day at the office?" she asked. He nodded. "Well, get in the car. We'll stop by Starbucks to get changed, and then straight to the party. Tonight you're going to forget all about frickin work."

"I'd love that," Richard replied. He quickly sent another email with his Blackberry, surreptitiously, as if she wouldn't notice.

As they drove to the Starbucks, Molly went over the details of her plan in her head. Everything had to go just right. Dozens of little snippets of conversation coalesced to feed her ambitions. Over breakfast three weeks ago, Richard had mentioned how much he'd like to just be someone else, for just one day. While watching television two nights later, Richard had talked about wishing he could focus on something else, but the office never left his thoughts. Molly had finally realized how bad it was when they were making love the other night.

The evening had gone well enough. A nice dinner, a little dancing--Richard was a spiffy ballroom dancer; there wasn't anything he didn't do well--and some wine by the fireplace. But the whole night it was as if Richard wasn't entirely there. Even when they were naked, and he was on top of her, and inside her, and transporting her to her ultimate happy place, it seemed like, oh, two percent of his attention was elsewhere. Sure, when she slipped her fingers into his mouth he responded by kissing and licking them, but still his mind seemed divided. It wasn't until she slipped a moistened finger inside his rear end that his eyes gave her the look which she craved--the look that said she was the center of his universe. "Just remember," Molly had said, "your boss may rent your mind, but your ass belongs to me." Richard didn't respond verbally, but actions speak louder than words, and he rode her home to the place without any words.

Molly could feel the bunched-up boxers in her jeans growing a little moist as she thought about how she would bring Richard to the place without any words.

But one step at a time.

*****

The Starbucks was mildly busy, and from the costumes people were wearing it was obvious that Molly and Richard weren't the only ones heading to a Halloween party. They both got lattes and sat down to sip at them. It was good to wind down. Richard pulled at his tie.

"Oh, just take that silly thing off," Molly said. Richard was glad to. "Now hand it over." Richard did. Molly draped it around her neck, and it hung loosely like a boa. Freckle-faced, and wearing t-shirt and jeans, Richard's little kewpie doll looked sexy as ever.

"Where are our costumes?" Richard asked. "Or how about you just wear that tie?"

"Jiminy!" Molly said. "I left them in the car. You go in the mens room and start getting out of your monkey suit and I'll bring them in. I'll knock twice long and one short, and you let me in."

"We can change at home," Richard offered.

"Tut, tut. That'll make us late. The Thomas's house is in the opposite direction. Hurry! I'll be right back."

By the time Richard heard her knock on the bathroom door, he was down to boxers and socks. Molly smiled when he let her in. "Come here often?" she asked as she locked the door.

"I haven't yet," Richard replied, "but I do remember a nightclub bathroom where I did."

Molly bit her lip. "I remember that too. Good time." It was indeed. Richard remembered it fondly. One of the many great things about Molly was her adventurous spirit. Richard eyed her as she lifted her t-shirt over her head, her curly brown hair and his tie cascading out of the neck hole. Molly's full breasts, naked, bounced with the motion. "Got time for a quickie, sailor?" she asked. Molly squatted down in front of him and pulled his boxers to his ankles. "Well hello, old friend," she said, staring at his penis. She told him to step out of his boxers, and then she took him in her mouth. What was he to do? It's rude to not listen to a woman who takes your cock between her lips. Richard complied, and rose to the occasion, although he almost fell over when there was a knock at the door.

"Just a minute!" Richard called out. Molly stood up, looking disappointed at being interrupted, but immediately grinned again as she shucked her jeans. Richard's eyes washed over her toned curves. "Nice boxers," he said.

"Thanks," Molly replied. "Now, tie my tie." Richard turned her around and pulled her close. His ribbed stomach pressed against her smooth back. He reached over her bare shoulders, squatting a bit, and tied a Windsor knot. His hardness rubbed up against her boxer-clad backside. He couldn't resist a couple of caresses of her full breasts. "Mmm," Molly moaned. Richard couldn't believe how sexy she looked wearing only black ankle socks, boxers, and his tie. His lucky tie. Molly's 5K races paid dividends in the form of the vibrant feminine curves of her calves. Strong legs and stamina came in handy. When Molly quickly pulled away from him, he knew it was because if she didn't then they wouldn't leave this bathroom for awhile. The guy outside knocked again as Molly bent over and rummaged through the wardrobe bag she'd brought in. Richard admired the taut smooth skin at the backs of her thighs. She pulled out a pair of pin striped trousers and a baggie filled with glitter. Richard wondered if he was going to be a mafioso this year. Nope. Molly slipped into the trousers. Of course he should have noticed they were way too small for him.

Molly put her hand in the baggie and tossed a sprinkling of glitter onto Richard's naked body. "Faerie dust," she said, "to transport you far, far away, to a magical place, where there are no stinking offices." She leaned close, winked, and whispered, "Only orifices."

"I like that idea," Richard replied.

"I bet you do." Molly pulled out a belly chain from the trousers' pocket and attached it around her slender waist. "Wow, more magic!" Molly said as she fingered the ornament which hung from the front of the belly chain--a golden tiger's tooth. "Can you tuck this away for me?" she asked as she spun to face the mirror. Richard reached around and grabbed hold of the gold tiger's tooth. He slipped his hand under the belt line of her trousers, and under the elastic of her boxers, and teased her shaved privates with the tooth. He breathed heavily on the back of her neck.

"It's like a little gold dick," he said.

Molly turned and beamed. "You're the one with the gold dick." She pulled a snug jacket out of the wardrobe bag and slipped it on. The stripes matched the ones on the trousers. Once it was buttoned, her breasts pressed together and pinched the necktie between them. A fedora topped off her costume. "I'm a gangster, see?" she said.

"A sexy gangster," Richard added. "And one who's turned on." He held up his fingers, showing her the moisture on them.

"Clean yourself up," Molly said. Richard reached for the faucet, but Molly grabbed his wrist firmly and guided his fingers into his mouth. He cleaned them with his tongue. "Good boy."

Molly folded up his suit and boxers. Richard tried to reach for his Blackberry. "No way, Jose," she said. Producing a cheap cellphone from the bag, she handed it to him. It was pink, with rhinestones and feathers attached to it. There was only one number programmed into it: Big M. "You're off the Crackberry tonight, buster."

Molly dumped a plastic supermarket bag on the floor, scooped up the wardrobe bag and headed out. "There's yours," she said, motioning to the supermarket bag. "I'll be waiting outside, casing the joint. Remember," she said, flicking at some of the gold glitter on his arm, "you're magical now. Well, MORE magical." She took the wardrobe bag containing all his clothes and left him standing there in only his black socks. He heard her tell the man waiting outside that he'd best use the ladies restroom.

Richard opened the plastic bag and chuckled. Figures, he thought. He peeled off his black socks and tossed them in the trash--a symbolic goodbye.

*****

Molly pinned her hair back and tucked it under her hat as she waited by the coffee counter for an expresso--didn't want to get sleepy-headed tonight! If her reflection in the plate glass hadn't confirmed how sexy she looked, with the trousers cupping her bottom nicely and the jacket accentuating her cleavage to full advantage, then the admiring looks from the male patrons would have done so. As it was, she now had two yea votes for sexy. Yea sexy!

Richard was so cooperative he hadn't even questioned her when she scooted out of that bathroom with all his clothes. Richard had no choice but to put on the costume, otherwise he'd have to come out naked! Now wouldn't that be something? With his hot bod he could pull it off, but the two of them might spend the night in jail. Well, Richard would, anyway, and that wouldn't do at all. She had plans for him.

Her cellphone buzzed with a text message: ARE YOU SERIOUS?

SERIOUS AS SYPHILIS. COME ON OUT, LOVER.

Molly was finishing tying the laces on her wingtip shoes when she heard the bathroom door open. Two teenage girls sitting on a sofa and sipping coffee started squealing when Richard came out. His hairy legs were clad in gartered stockings, and his torso was barely covered by a French can-can girl's costume. Whoops. Looked like Molly underestimated his proper size. Richard teetered briefly on the two-inch heels.

"Hey, doll," Molly said, cracking wise as Richard fumbled toward her, "give us some sugar." The girls on the sofa started applauding. Richard took a bow. "Not so low, sweet-cheeks. Your can-can is popping out." Richard blushed as he stood up straight. Then he leaned over slightly and kissed Molly on the cheek. Molly grabbed his head with both hands and planted a bold buss on his kisser, her tongue lashing the backs of his front teeth. As she pulled away, Molly said, "Big M expects some affection from his moll, doll. Don't be gyppin' Big M when she's showing you off around town."

"You got it, Big M," Richard said with a grin. "I suppose I deserve this after the Harem Girl thing."

"Oh, Big M will give you what you deserve, sweet-cheeks. Don't you worry. Now get your ass to the car and don't talk to nobody, you hear? Nobody." Richard smiled and left, amid applause from the teenage girls. Molly watched him get to the car and saw the look on his face when he realized it was locked, and that he'd have to stand there and wait for her. Molly took her expresso to a table and sat where she could watch Richard try to defend his skirt against the whipping wind.

So far the plan was going perfect.

*****

The breeze felt odd, wrapping itself around Richard's stockinged legs and shooting through the mesh of his lace panties. The Harem Girl costume had seemed like a good idea at the time, but Richard was starting to regret last year's choice. The shoes were killing his feet. His pink cellphone buzzed.

WALK AROUND OUT FRONT. SHOW OFF BIG M'S PRIZE BOOTY AND WALK LIKE A WORKING GIRL, PLUS YOU'LL GET USED TO THOSE SHOES.

Richard gamely strolled back and forth across the front of the store. The lingering smell of Starbucks java beans reminded him he needed to renegotiate with the coffee vendor at the office. A passing car honked in appreciation of his walk, or costume, or both. Richard bowed as if he'd received an Academy Award, but then remembered his lace-covered ass was facing the Starbucks window. He stood up straight quickly, and threw Molly a wink through the window. The teenage girls were enjoying the show.

DON'T LOOK AT ME. AND SWING YOUR HIPS WHEN YOU WALK.

Richard obeyed the text message. A man in biker gear, Richard wasn't sure if it was a costume or not, said "hey sexy" as he passed by. Richard mumbled back a thank you. His burgeoning erection withered on the vine. Suddenly he didn't feel so magical. He felt foolish.

Molly burst out of the store and marched toward the car. She looked at Richard and said, "Get in the fucking car." Whoa. Molly NEVER talked like that. He found it a bit titillating, and so did his penis. "I said get in the car," she said, "you stupid cunt." Molly slammed the roof of the Benz with her open palm. Richard opened the door and kind of fell into the passenger seat. Apparently he hadn't yet mastered the heels. "Very graceful," Molly said as she sat beside him.

"What's the matter, Molly?"

She reached over and smacked his groin, right on his surprisingly erect member. "My name is Big M. And I told you not to talk to anybody, bitch." She tossed a blond wig and a small black purse in Richard's lap. "Put your hair on, and fix your face. You look disgusting." Richard muttered an apology, slipped the wig on, and opened the purse. There was only a lipstick in it--Wanton Red. He did the best he could, and then slipped the lipstick and his cellphone in his bag. When he looked up from that, Molly shoved a bootlegger's flask to his mouth. Warm rum swarmed into his mouth and down his throat. "This should make you more agreeable."

Molly revved the engine and put her arm around Richard, pulling him close. She reached down to the front of his skirt, checking him like she would a Thanksgiving turkey to see if it was ready. His fully erect penis jumped at her touch. This juicy turkey was fully cooked.

"Big M," Richard said, "I'm sorry." He reached over and straightened her lapels, flattened her tie between her bare breasts. Molly patted his cheek and kissed his head.

"You will be," Molly replied. She twisted his nipple through the can-can bodice. Richard's cock struggled against the constricting lace panties. It bounced in place. She pulled out of the lot. Richard nestled against her and wondered what she had in mind.

*****

Molly snaked her hand under Richard's body and onto his leg. He was shaking. It didn't feel like shaking from cold, or shaking from fear. It felt like shaking with anticipation. Molly looked at herself in the rearview, and there was a huge smile on her face. The plan was working perfectly. Richard was such a good sport. It was one of the things she loved about him.

"Big M? I'm hungry."

"No problem, sugar." At the next corner, Molly pulled into the McDonald's drive-thru and ordered a cheeseburger with three packets of catsup. She fondled his lace-clad penis through the skirt while the drive-thru clerk pretended not to notice. The perfume of Mickey Goodness filled the air. "Sit up straight, like a lady," Molly said, "and touch yourself while Big M eats."

She watched Richard out of the corner of her eye as she took bite after bite out of the burger. Judging from where his hand was, his erection was at its fullest, albeit pinned to the side by the panties. At one point Molly put the burger in her lap, and Richard looked hopeful. Molly let it sit there while Richard salivated. Molly did her darnedest to fix him with a glare. The look on Richard's face told her he had no idea what she might be pretending to be mad about.

At a red light Molly said, "You going to just sit there when I've got burger juice on my face? Make yourself useful, you dumb cunt, and grab a napkin." Richard hastily picked up a folded yellow napkin and dabbed at her face daintily. He opened his mouth as if to speak and Molly shot her hand to his crotch, searching for, finding, and crushing his balls. "Were you going to say something?" Richard shook his head no, his blond locks bobbing. "Drink some more rum." He did. She noticed a smile forming behind the Bootlegger's flask. Goodie.

Molly let the cheeseburger sit on her lap and continued driving. She pulled into the Homestead Mall parking garage and wound their way up to the fourth level, second from the top. Awash in the yellowed sodium lights, Richard looked puzzled. The mall was closed, and there were no cars on this level. The cold concrete and isolated garage were all grimy and stark. Molly went back to her burger and stared out at the suburban sprawl around Homestead mall, visible over the concrete parapet. The whole town stretched out before them. Horn honks and a distant siren filled the Halloween night air. Molly swallowed the last bite of the burger and killed the engine, still enjoying the night breeze and suburban streetlights peeking out from the treetops.