Calculated Risk Ch. 02

He was certainly putting all his focus in one place...

She was glad that he had liked the blowjob—he'd certainly been fairly dry at first and tasted different, but still musky—but she was not sure why he'd made her stop the way he did. She was glad they were facing each other now, even though she couldn't really reach her clitoris to try to get off as well. Maybe afterward, like last time? It wasn't like he could focus much on her at the moment anyway....

His long arms could easily reach her breasts and shoulders, and he alternated gripping and stroking her in various places, anywhere from her neck down to her hips. It did please her that he touched her in other places as he plunged in over and over; alien or not, he was appreciative of her female curves.

She enjoyed the moment for what it was, not really focused on herself coming but observing as much as she could now that she could actually see.

Skaun shifted her legs a bit higher at one point, folding her up a little more and thrusting in even more deeply. She could feel sore muscles stretching, edging toward protest, as the tip of his penis—which lacked any foreskin but not because he'd been circumcised—nudging persistently against her cervix. If he pushed much harder it would hurt.

The Vulcan could reach her face now as one hand gripped hard to her shoulder for leverage and the rough, dry fingers of the other stroked from her temple down to the skin of her cheek and beneath her jaw.

He did that three times, his thumb passing over her lips, and it felt astonishingly intimate; she rather wished he'd open his blue eyes to meet her dark ones. She herself could barely graze her fingers along any of the Vulcan's skin except his long arms. She took hold of his hard forearm and squeezed, holding on to it.

As his hand fully cupped the side of her face, she began to hear a low, very low droning sound that was distracting and disconcerting. It was in the background but getting louder. Was it a shuttle passing overhead? An animal? A rock slide? What was it?

It slowly grew in volume, and as it did, Madeleine could feel her pussy heat up as if it had been set on fire. It sounded like someone yelling, echoing, and some crackling sensation started in her toes and fingers and spread inward, making her groan as it overtook her torso. It felt as though some kind of drug had been introduced to her system, and she was able to follow its progress as it diffused throughout tissue.

She thrashed and jerked involuntarily as the powerful effect grew, and she climaxed suddenly; she hadn't been prepared for it and it slammed into her gut like a boxer had thrown an ecstatic punch: every bit as much pain as pleasure.

When it had settled—if not actually passed— she tried to look around her, she didn't want to look at Skaun. But again she couldn't see; it was dark.

How could it be dark already?? The suns had just risen!

She could still feel the Vulcan cycling in and out her but now it felt strange...she became less and less aware of being filled and more aware...of doing the filling. It felt so wonderful, was such a relief, her warm, sticky flesh was so soft and willing and the sensation was heightened with emotion, by deep gratitude to her and love for another who was not here but may be greatly affected by their act nonetheless.

Her breath caught as this washed through her mind repeatedly and her lungs started to itch deep down and she coughed once, twice. Immediately she saw an image in front of her eyes, one of an adolescent Vulcan boy whom she didn't recognize, lying one a traditional pallet inside a simple hut. He looked thin and weakened, and when he coughed, bright green dots spotted his lips or the cloth that was held to his mouth. The hand that held the cloth was hers...

...or, not hers. His. Skaun's hand held the cloth.

She squirmed or tried to, bewildered and more than a little frightened, with pleasure still washing over her like waves of cool water.

She saw herself working long hours in the lab, thinking and talking with colleagues, and writing. She felt anew her great excitement at the news of the research project she would be involved in; she would get to travel and see new places, observe and add to the collection of knowledge for the Federation of Planets. She did have resources.

They both still believed she could get Skaun that shuttle he needed.

At the reaffirmation, Madeleine felt a greater relaxation within herself, a giving in or giving over...and she was terrified at the power of the first contraction she felt, the way it swelled and inexorably overtook her, held her helpless. Oh God, it was so powerful, it felt so good, but was so slow even as her heartbeat seemed to triple her normal rate in her own ears.

No...not her heart. Skaun's. She struggled for at least one independent thought but failed.

With the second and third crests, she didn't know how long they lasted but everything, every thought and sight and smell blacked out for her except for those unearthly crests of sensation that she experienced right alongside him. She may have screamed, or moaned with each luscious wave, she wasn't sure, but it felt too big for her to contain in silence.

The following swells began to run together and she stopped counting, barely catching her breath as she prepared for the next one. Something about it reminded her of stories she'd heard of childbirth or rollercoasters: *Hold on, breathe, hang in there, because here we go again...!*

She was lost.

She could barely move when she became semi-aware of the hot, dry air again, as Skaun gently unfolded her body to set her feet to the ground. She winced as the stiff muscles acquiesced only grudgingly. She was really, really wet between her legs...

"Madeleine? Please answer me."

"Hm?" she asked, her eyes unable to focus on the fuzzy face above her.

"Tell me where you are."

She turned her head slightly away from him, eyes looking around interestedly like an infant in a cradle. Then she looked back. "I'm in a cave. With my pants down."

"Correct. And my name? What is it?"

It took a moment, but she answered, "Skaun."

The young Vulcan nodded and started dabbing that dry scrap of cloth between her legs again, wiping up the worst of the moisture for her as she lay topless on her back. She vaguely wanted to protest him coddling her but really didn't have the energy. She only wanted to sleep; it was time to sleep...

The Vulcan patiently tugged her panties and pants back into place and did them up for her. He didn't make her get off their shirts upon which she still laid; he encouraged her onto her side and pressed his chest against her back, putting an arm around her in a bewildering but very comforting gesture.

"Go to sleep, Madeleine."

****

The shallow cave was cooler and the shade of dusk the next time she opened her eyes, and she immediately started sobbing softly, tears leaking out of her eyes and her body shaking. It woke up the Vulcan but he was silent for a long time as she shook and sucked in air from time to time. She was still facing away from him and certainly didn't want to roll over.

Skaun got up on his elbow, leaning over and she hid her face with her hands. "Madeleine?"

"What was that? What did you do?" she mumbled.

"What was what?"

"Why could I see your brother lying there, and why could I feel what it's like for you to cum? And jeez, fuck, how do you stand it??" She uncovered her face and looked over her shoulder at him with a dirt-and-mud streaked face.

The Vulcan blinked and she could actually see the double-layer covering his eyes that she hadn't noticed before. He was staring again and hadn't seemed to hear her question. "Why does water flow from your eyes?"

"It...it...I don't know! It's how we express strong emotion, I guess!" she blurted, sniffing and wiping her nose, then crossing her bare breasts as she sat up stiffly. "And that's sure as Hell what I felt. Now you answer me. I saw...S-Srill. His name is Srill, right? I felt your orgasm. Did you do a...a mind meld? Was that what it was?"

He sat up as well and shifted a little back from her, looking at the ground a few moments before looking back. "Yes. Telepathy through contact. I...it's a normal occurrence during Pon Farr—"

"With other Vulcans, maybe!" she barked. "It didn't happen to me the first time!"

"I was...holding back," he said, now sounding a little unsure.

"And you didn't hold back this last time?"

"You already know the answer to that question."

"Okay, then why didn't you hold back?" she demanded.

"You were...willing. You were smiling at me, holding me, and asked me to mate facing you. You...used your mouth on me unlike I've known any—"

She closed her eyes and shook her head, making a gesture with her hand that begged he stop talking.

God, he was right...she'd been looking forward to it, as though she had been looking at it much less a necessity and more like very welcome contact out in the wilderness. She had thought it would be a repeat of the first time, only a little more familiar and little more comfortable, because she'd done it once before.

It definitely hadn't been that. It had been even more alien, and she almost felt pregnant by him regardless, having part of his memories and those intense feelings still inside her head.

"Could've warned me...." she whispered. "I had no idea it felt like that...."

"I am sorry, Madeleine. I have to claim complete ignorance on your reproduction. Yet I cannot change what's already happened."

She was quiet, not even sure what she was arguing about or what she wanted out of it. He said he was sorry. He was part of a race that could share thoughts and emotion beneath that cold, logical veneer they put up. It was "normal."

Fine. She couldn't do it with him again, though, no way she'd risk this raw exposure again. How far could he travel now before...?

A hint of urgency sprouted in her chest as she recalled the memory of Skaun's brother as clearly as if it had been her own. Srill was still waiting for them. For him.

"We should go, shouldn't we?" She echoed her earlier words in a tighter, controlled voice as she reached for their tops beneath her, handing him his to beat the dust out of it before putting it on while she did the same. "You feel better, right?"

"Yes. It may have passed, Madeleine, I may not need to mate again."

"Frankly, I hope so."

****

That same sense of urgency grew stronger as the second, more distant sun finally set and Madeleine found herself pushing much harder than she had the previous night. She still couldn't see as well but Skaun held her arm over rough spots and chose easier paths even if they weren't the most direct.

She wondered whether the urgency was something she was feeling through his touch or as a "leftover" from the sex, still planted in her skull, but regardless the urge to run, and keep running forever, was only relieved by maintaining as fast a pace as she could in the dark. In a way she really appreciated the focus and peace it gave her from her own thoughts and doubts.

Somehow she had a good understanding of just how much she was slowing Skaun down and in frustration she pushed harder and harder. She wasn't trained for this the way he was, though, and the planet's gravity still weighed her down more than her companion. Small jumps for him put extra strain on her ankles and knees and lower back. She'd finished her water before the night was a quarter done, and Skaun gave her another container of his.

They ate while walking and shared few words, saving their breath for climbing. She didn't complain but knew she was still going through her water too quickly; her tongue constantly felt thick and tacky, she started to cough even through her respirator, and her feet and legs were not only hurting from the long hours but dehydration cramps were shooting up her muscles at the half-way point of the night.

From there they saw a diminishing rate as she started limping and her teeth were constantly gritted against pain.

At last Skaun took her shoulder and forced her to stop. "Thank you for everything you've done to help, Madeleine, but you're no longer able to help as you are."

A shock of fear spiked down her spine as she wondered what he meant by that? No longer able to help? Was he going to leave her out here? Was he going to...do something...?

An expression of surprise showed on his face and he let go of her shoulder as he said, "I won't hurt you. I won't leave you to die. I promise."

"Okay, then...keeping talking," she murmured, her heart still pounding as she shifted from foot to foot. God, they ached so much...

"We're not far away, another few hours if I carry you on my back."

"You've got to be joking."

"Jokes are not very useful out here."

"So you're going to carry me instead."

"You weigh only as much as my pack when full, Madeleine."

That comparison sort of surprised her. Even though she did know Vulcans were stronger than humans, she hadn't seen herself as only the same burden as a supply bag.

Great. That was going to stick with her for the rest of her life. Thank God her lab colleagues hadn't heard that. She was out of water, though, and hurt so much, was so tired. Could he really handle it?

"Well...okay," she agreed.

Skaun removed his pack and set it carefully on the ground, picking out certain items—particularly Srill's medicine and the last bottle of water—to transfer to her own smaller bag, which she'd keep on her person. He was going to leave the rest of it here, but he removed two of the straps before he kneeled down to let her climb onto his back, and together they used them to lash her arms and legs about him so she had some leverage and relief against the strain on her limbs.

Madeleine felt a little dizzy as he stood up. So this was what it was like to be tall.

When Skaun started a long-loped gait, it took them working together so her less balanced weight wouldn't work against him. Once she found the right angle and way to cling to him and he became accustomed to the feel of the woman on his back, their pace picked up again and Madeleine watched the moonscape with her eyes wide open as it passed rather quickly by her.

She felt and heard the deep, deep breaths Skaun was taking, felt his legs flexing and pushing against the ground to carry them over it. It was kind of like riding a horse, all that power bunching beneath you and somehow both pounding the earth jarringly hard while the scenery still glided smoothly past.

Skaun's skin was hot against her, radiating as she held on, but the only reason it was growing humid between them was because of her. She really did leak water like a sieve....

For a few hours she said nothing, tried to think nothing, to ignore the pain of her body and only listen to Skaun's body as he carried her. It was meditative. A few times she got sleepy but was shocked awake by the mental image of falling off the Vulcan's back and cracking her head on a rock—helmet or no helmet, a fall would hurt—and more or less remained awake.

Skaun didn't speak, and in fact his body moved so rhythmically in every way that she wondered whether he wasn't meditating a little, too.

In those few hours, as he'd said, she saw city lights glowing just beyond a jagged line of hills and mountains, and she felt Skaun's excitement in addition to her own. She made a happy sound that made no sense but the Vulcan patted her leg briefly as if saying, "I know."

As always with long trips, that last ten or fifteen minutes dragged on as they got closer, as Skaun brought them closer. Eventually, though, they made it to the gate and the sunrise hadn't yet begun.

It took little debate to convince those they met that Madeleine needed medical attention quickly.

****

Even while her human medic was setting up an IV drip to rehydrate her, Madeleine was demanding to see her research partner, Mr. Perette, and would someone please wake him up and bring him here? It was extremely important.

Skaun had been taken to another room to be checked out as well, and the wait seemed interminable as she was treated for the blisters on her feet, the pulled muscles and various scrapes from both the crash and the general trek, and from the sex.

Apparently she had a lot of deep tissue bruises in her abdomen that bewildered her medic at first. She kept her mouth shut until her partner arrived. There would be plenty of evidence for recent sexual activity in her exam, she knew, the medical staff weren't stupid, but she wanted Skaun gone before then and not to get caught up in any red tape.

Tom Perette showed up looking groggy but dressed in his tawny brown jumpsuit, his sandy brown hair disheveled as if he hadn't combed it.

"Maddy, don't take this the wrong way, but what the Hell are you doing back so soon? What happened and why are you here?"

She urged him closer, keeping her voice low. "The shuttle went down before I got there. The Vulcan in the next room helped me get back here, but it was rough going. Now I really need you to help me with something. Skaun, that's the Vulcan, has a sick brother he's trying to get back to. As his reward for helping me, I want us to fund a shuttle to take him back."

Tom stared at the intensity on her face, saw how tired she looked and could at least deduce the last few days had been hard ones. Maybe she was lucky to be alive.

"Well...alright, that shouldn't be a problem. We do have some spare fuel ration in the grant. So when do you want to do this?"

"Now. Immediately. The longer he stays here, the greater the chance he won't get the medicine there in time."

"Gotcha."

After a pause, she said with a touch of exasperation, "So go get him. He's next door, he should be fine to leave. He's not so banged up the way I am."

Tom smiled jokingly at her, "Thy will be done, Shorty. So I take it the observation of the Time of Reflection is delayed?"

"Hell, yes. I'm in no shape to go there and watch a tribe of Vulcans for ten days. We'll push it back to next year."

"Check. Want someone to escort him?"

Madeleine shook her head. "More people means more weight, means higher cost to the shuttle and it's unnecessary. I still have to justify the fuel use. Just make sure the pilot is someone who is coming right back here afterward so we know it was successful."

"Okey-dokey."

Tom left to go to the next room and she heard some soft talking, but not much. It seemed the medic was okay with letting Skaun leave because she heard two sets of feet walking out of the room before long.

Her chest squeezed, partly in fear, partly excitement, as she couldn't decide whether she wanted Skaun to say good-bye or not. What would they even say to each other?

The Vulcan did pause outside her door but didn't enter; they made eye contact with Tom watching. Skaun lifted his right hand and saluted her, palm forward with his fingers parted between the middle and ring finger, his thumb outstretched.

She felt a lump in her throat and swallowed against it. Tears welled up in her eyes and she mimicked the gesture with a nod.

"May your brother get well soon," she said quietly.

Live long and prosper.

****

When the shuttle finally landed on an extremely small platform a quarter mile outside Skaun's village, his elders were already there nearly clustering around him as he stepped off, eyes straining against the too-bright light of day.

The human pilot had given him a wave good-bye but said he'd remain there until the Vulcans stepped away and then he'd lift off and head back. It had only taken a few hours to get Skaun here; the suns were high and hot in the sky, but not even twelve hours ago he'd still been walking with Madeleine back to Ta'Ralor under moonlight. He was exhausted but still determined to carry his task to the end.