Charles & Claire Ch. 43

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

The next morning, it seemed like a good idea to do some dancing. I took Sarah's laptop, synced my IPhone, and then hooked my IPhone to sync to my laptop, thus getting all of the Playlists that had been made over the last couple of months.

I selected our 'Carnegie Hall Playlist 1' and we went through all of the routines, starting with 'Bad Romance' and finishing with 'I'm Not That Girl.' Everything still was fresh and Kalista and I actually changed a little bit to our 'Cry Me a River' Rumba routine.

A quick pee break, and we went right into 'Carnegie Hall Playlist 2,' again hitting all of the dances perfectly as we'd originally choreographed.

We then went over our 'Elitch 1 Playlist,' skipping over any routines we'd already done. Annie and Sarah got up to start lunch while the girls and I went through the 'Elitch 2' list and after all of that... my legs and back were a bit sore.

I asked my fiancé, "Claire-Bear, after lunch could you give me a full-body massage?"

"Only if I can get one from you in return, Lover?" she responded.

"Oh, that can be arranged," I said giving her a quick kiss as we sat down to homemade chimichangas that smelled outstanding.

"Mother, I want to know how to make all of the different meals you and Annie make for us - I want to fix dinner for my man," Claire casually said.

Sarah and Annie both rolled their eyes and just snickered as they sat down.

"That sounds so nice that you want to fix dinner for 'your man' but we've only about 40 - 45 days home between now and your wedding day, so for now, Annie and I love making dinner for us all," Sarah said.

I put my fork down, cleared my throat and said, "Ladies, I love you all, and whoever wants to make dinner is fine. I just want to make it clear that if Annie and Sarah ever want to take an evening off, then go ahead. The three of us can always fend for ourselves. I've tasted Claire and Super-K's cooking, and I know how to cook a pizza."

They all laughed and shook their heads. Claire and I gave each other a quick kiss as we went back for more chimichangas.

After dinner, Kalista came up to me and said, "I came across a word I'd like to understand better, Charles?"

"OK, what is it Super-K?" I replied, rubbing my hands together in anticipation of what dictionary word, K wanted to talk about.

She walked up to me and whispered very quietly, "Fuck."

I quickly blushed and I suddenly had a nervous laugh as I took her to the sofa. Everyone saw my reaction and wondered what could've caused it.

"Everybody, please sit down, we're going to have a discussion about a whole class of words that are generally classified as 'dirty words' or to be more specific, obscene or vulgar words. I'm certain Mom and Sarah have heard just about all of the words, especially the ones that describe female body parts... as well as male body parts."

"There's an even more special class of words, popularly entitled 'The Seven Dirty Words' made popular by the legendary deceased comedian George Carlin. They originally were called the 'Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television.' I can clearly remember two of the words have been used by the members of our group -- 'Tits and Shit.'"

They all reacted to these two words as Kalista raised her hand.

"Yes, Kalista?" I responded.

"You don't have to go through all of this Charles - I was just wondering?" K said.

"I know Kalista, but this discussion could have some long lasting after-effects that would be good for us all."

"First word - Tits, can anybody tell me what are 'tits?'" I said with as straight a face as possible.

Annie raised her hand - so that's how this is going to go?

"Yes, Ms. Moynihan?"

"I believe that the word Tit came from the mispronunciation of the word Teat, which is an alternative term to the word nipple," mom said with a smile on her face.

There was a bit of a giggle, but nothing too terrible.

"Very good Ms. Moynihan - so some good old boy heard the word Teat and out of his cousin-loving mind, he said Tit. The word is still considered vulgar, but is regularly heard on prime time and late night television. So along the way it went from meaning the nipple or the teat, to the whole breast."

"There is something of an obsession with breasts, bosoms or tits, whichever term is used, that I'll admit to having - along with every red-blooded non-homosexual male on this planet, whether they'll admit to it or not. In this very room we have 5 pairs of breasts, although mine don't really count," I said holding back a snicker.

"I like them," said Claire.

"I think they're cute," said Kalista.

"Not bad for a guy," said Sarah.

Mom remarked, "I invoke my rights, under the 5th Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America, against self-incrimination, Charles."

"I expected no less, my lady," I chuckled in response.

"Before we go on to the next word, I'm interested to have you each tell me the strangest euphemisms you've heard from some guy trying to pay you a compliment specifically about your breasts?" I said, now snickering aloud.

"I'll start everyone off - bust, mammaries, assets, bazookas, boobs..."

"Boobs is a dirty word Charles?" Kalista asked.

"Not these days, K - it's a kinder gentler term, often heard from people trying to be cute instead of offensive," I said, wanting her to be OK with the fact she uses the term a lot.

"Anybody else got a good one they've heard? Sarah, I'd think as big and beautiful as you are, that you've heard some really good ones," I expressed.

"Charles, as a matter of fact, I've heard more than just a few, but my short list would include; cans, gazongas, jugs, twins, and funbags. My personal favorite is chesticles," Sarah responded, causing them all to giggle, gasp and otherwise react.

"Anybody else?" I said.

Claire slowly raised her hand.

"I had a guy use the term 'melons,' but I didn't get it?" she said.

Annie got up and went to the fridge and brought back a couple of cantaloupes, holding them directly in front of her own breasts. Claire got the connection and laughed, then blushed.

"Annie you got any watermelons in there?" Sarah said, causing us all to nearly bust a gut laughing.

"OK, ladies that was fun, on to the next word."

Over the next two hours, we discussed,

Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt/Pussy, Cock (but not Cocksucker), Motherfucker (try to explain that without starting a deep discussion of Incest?) and I added the terms Ass and Balls, due to Lenny Bruce and his 'Nine Words.'

All without any visual aids or anyone exposing themselves. There was a lot of blushing.

I did make a point of that, just because we've discussed the words, it didn't mean we could or should casually use them amongst ourselves, and especially around other people.

When it was all over, Annie and Sarah came up to Claire and me.

Sarah said, "Charles, we must admit that when this whole discussion started, your mother and I were aghast. However you made it fun, and interesting. I'd never heard the terms 'custard launcher' or 'pump-action shotgun' and I hope we never do again. That might've been more interesting with a... visual aid."

"Mother!" Claire said with a giggle.

Annie gave Sarah a hard slap on the back of her head for that.

"I meant a cucumber or a banana, Charles," Sarah laughed.

Claire and I just walked away from both of them.

"Charles, I never new being dirty was so funny. You blushed a lot, we all did, but you seemed to be in control at all times. Unlike the last time we were in the Spa," she said with her eyes so sparkling and her lips so inviting.

"Do you want to test that theory, my lovely Sweet-Rack?" I teased.

"You bet that beautiful butt of yours, Honey-Buns," she replied.

*********** ***********

We found ourselves alone in the spa with my bountiful fiancée on top of me.

"Charles, this is so peaceful, just you and me, don't you think?"

"Anywhere it's just you and me, feels so perfect. I love you," I said, "That and knowing we're going to be married in just 410 days.

"Really, that's so cool. We did promise to go through that pre-marriage counseling Charles, what do you think they ask?"

"I found a website about it - do you want to go over some of the questions?" I asked.

"Sure, sounds like fun," Claire responded.

"There are close to 50 questions, I'll only do some, that OK with you, Claire-Bear?"

"Ready," she said putting my hands on her tummy.

"First question - Why do you want to get married? You first," I said.

"Well, I met this wonderful young man, who looks at me like I'm the only woman he's ever looked at before. He brightens my day - He fills my night - He's in my heart everywhere I go."

"Beautiful answer sweetie - The first moment I laid eyes on Claire McArthur, I thought my heart had stopped. I didn't know what that feeling meant at first - I was only 12 years old. But since then, I can't stand to not be by her side, her smile lifts me up into the clouds, I can only imagine the additional joys that marriage will bring to both of our lives," I said welling up a bit.

"Next question Claire - Do you think it's important to be faithful to one another? - I'll go first this time -- Yes! Being faithful is the way that two people show each other that they love one another. I've never loved another woman as much as I love my future wife. After our careers as dancers come to an end, I plan to 'be faithful' to my wife at least one a day."

"Charles, that's sweet, but too much information for whoever it is that questions us - I think being faithful is more than only sleeping with only one person after marriage - it's also promising to love and care for all of those people that my husband loves and cares for."

"Claire - that's beautiful, the way you expressed that. You're smart, caring, lovely to look at, and you love me almost as much as I love you, don't you?" I teased.

"No, I love you more," Claire said.

"No, I Love you more, you sweet bundle of love, you." This was fun.

Things got into a tickling match, which somehow got me 'hard', and as soon as Claire realized it, she settled down and leaned back again and moaned.

Annie and Sarah walked up to us.

"We heard most of that kids," Annie said.

"It wasn't on purpose, but we realized after hearing that - just how deeply you two DO care for one another," Sarah said.

"We won't require you to go through counseling, unless you want to. A love like yours should be encouraged, not questioned," Annie said coming to tears and holding Sarah's hand.

Claire got up off me and turned around and started a kiss, so the Moms left us, as my tongue entered my girls' mouth. My hands were both under the water so I took my left hand and slid it under her bikini bottom and squeezed her butt -- hard! She squeaked a little and said quietly, "You bad boy - don't stop."

Kalista came by in her swimsuit, saw what we were doing and yelled, "Charles & Claire are making out in the Spa!"

Claire and I separated enough for me to say, "They know, they encouraged it."

"Oh, well - Claire, could I have him for a minute or two, with some encouragement?" Kalista asked with a smile and a giggle.

Knowing my condition, I was hoping that Claire would say a firm 'No,' but she got up and said to Kalista, "Have at him K, but you're on a timer, so make good use of your time with my fiancé."

I pulled my hand from her suit, and she got up smiling at me, but still gave me a 'be careful' as she got out of the Spa.

"Kalista, you have until I get back down here OK?" Claire said.

"Yes ma'am," was Kalista's reply as she got in the spa and moved into the exact position Claire was just in. As she put her face near mine, it happened.

"Charles, what is... Ooh. Ow. Doesn't that hurt?" She was worried.

"No K, it's alright - I've been worried about this moment between you and me, can we just make out like you wanted to?"

"But... that belongs to Claire, not me," she blushed. I laughed.

"Would it help you to know that you've caused it before, all by yourself. I've just been trying to avoid this moment, knowing one or both of us would be really embarrassed. It's already lessened, so let's make out OK?"

She lay back down and we started to really kiss as I heard Claire's footfall. Since K was facing towards me I raised my hand asking for five more minutes. Claire went back upstairs, as Kalista's lips never broke stride. She separated and moved to my neck which I knew would restart things, she got in the crook of my neck and voila, she moved her face to mine and said, "Thank you, Daddy."

She got up and out, as I was catching my breath from the total experience I just had with my future stepdaughter. As I saw K leave going up the stairs, I saw Claire and K high-five each other.

Claire brought me a towel; she'd changed into a tight shirt and shorts. I got out, dried myself off and wrapped the towel around my waist.

"So, how long has that been planned, Sweet-Rack?" I asked.

"Only since we've been home on vacation, she didn't ask but I thought she deserved some 'special time' with her Daddy-to-be. I remembered that one dream of yours where you said she got up on your lap..."

"OK, Claire - I guess I understand? Don't expect any details about any of it from me," I said rather defensively.

"Charles, I didn't mean to make you mad - I just wanted Kalista to get that out of her system. The Tour starts in three days and it was probably her last best chance before we leave."

"Actually that's a rather logical plan Claire-Bear, when did you get to be so diabolical, anyway?" I asked.

"Have you forgotten who my mother is?" she said with a shake of the girls.

She followed me upstairs, I took a shower - a cold one, and changed into some dance clothes. I asked Claire to as well.

#DING DONG#

I went to the front door, and opened it to a nice-looking older gentleman, probably in his late 50s or 60s.

"Hello, can I help you?" I asked.

He said, clearing his throat, "Well, Ladies and Gentlemen... In my over forty years of watching and announcing dancing, the judges confirmed what I am about to tell you, That dance got the first perfect score in over 30 years."

Our Announcer!

He introduced himself as Dan Tannen, as everyone came in from wherever they were in the house.

As we all sat down, I asked, "Well Sir, what brings you out to our neck of the woods?"

"Well, everyone - after you more or less retired from Competitions, I decided to as well. I'd been doing it for over 40 years, and it seemed that after you came along, it was time to slow down a little. That having being said, I've heard of your plans to start your own Tour and I was wondering if you wanted an announcer as you traveled from place to place?"

We were all stunned silent for a moment!

"Well, Dan - that's a fascinating idea. Would you want or expect to be paid," I asked, with Claire slapping me on my shoulder.

"Well, Newman's and McArthurs, I'm rather well off, so there's no need for payment. Just being near the best dancers I've ever seen... would be payment enough. I thought I could travel ahead, prepare for the next location, as you do that voodoo that you do so well."

That caused the mom's to both chuckle. He has such a marvelous speaking voice.

"Dan, what about your wife and kids?" I asked.

"Well," he said, welling up a bit, "My kids have kids your age Charles - my wife of 33 years passed away a couple of years back, and I threw myself back deep into my job as an announcer for the NDCA. That's about the same time you and this lovely fiancée of yours came along and put our Regional NDCA back on the map. The crowds doubled for most classes, tripled for yours, and I've been following your career closely ever since."

"Well Dan, speaking for all of us, we'd love you to join us, but I won't let you do it for free. Through poster sales and some other developments, the five of us are quite well off. So if Dan 'the man' Tannen wants to be the voice of Charles & Claire..."

"...And the Sparkling Kalista," Dan voiced.

"... And the Sparkling Kalista, you'll just have to take a $500 a week salary."

"Hot Damn," Dan said, quickly apologizing to everyone.

I enquired, "How would you like to get an early start at things by being our Announcer at our Wedding Event, next October 15th?"

"Sure I would - just give me the when and where?" he immediately responded.

"Sarah will get your particulars Dan," I followed up.

After a bit we shook hands to the deal, and Dan left.

"Sarah, you didn't scare him did you?" I asked, as she was finishing up some typing.

"No, he actually looked me in the eyes the whole time, Charles. Darn it. He's kind of cute," Sarah responded.

"Behave," said Annie as she walked over to Sarah and they kissed the most amazing kiss I ever saw between two women, and the first time they kissed like this, in front of the three of us.

Oh my!

*********** ***********

It's the Saturday before Labor Day. We're all so very excited about the International Something Special Tour. I asked Claire to give me a good back massage before we went back over all of the new dances we'd added.

With recent events, I've decided that spooning up against Claire isn't really significantly different then our being in the spa together, so last night I snuggled right up behind her. She made a noise that told me she approved. She took my right hand and placed it just below her breasts, which made us... both, quite happy. I kissed her on the back of her neck for a while and we fell asleep cuddling and in close bodily contact.

Now, it's Saturday morning and I'm getting out of the shower and Claire's at the bathroom door saying she needs to pee.

"I'll be out in 30 seconds Claire," I yelled.

"Close your eyes, I'm coming in," she said, and I got the towel around me and my eyes were closed as quickly as I could. I heard her walk in, put down the toilet seat and sit down. At that point I'd left, and she moaned in satisfaction.

I was out, holy crap - that was close!

I changed into some comfortable, but danceable clothes.

She came out, blushing, "I'm sorry Charles, that won't happen again, I promise."

"I have a solution, but it's only for the short-term?" I said.

"What's that," she said licking her lips, "showering together?"

"That's the... long-term solution, after we're married Sweet-Rack," I said rather cloyingly, "No, we get a non-transparent shower curtain, then one of us could be in the shower and the other could come in, if necessary."

"That's my man, always trying to be of such high moral character. I'm taking a shower - see you in a bit downstairs, ready to dance," she explained.

"Damn right - little lady," I said. "The back massage can happen later."

I went downstairs and saw everyone lounging around.

"Hey, K - wanna dance?"

She got up and said, "Sure - where's Claire?"

"She's taking a shower - I thought we'd get started without her. Some of our new stuff - Is it on CD yet?" I asked looking at the Moms.

"Oh yeah - Charles, it's all on one CD - I figured we could move it as needed," Annie said.

I walked up to her and said, "Thanks Mom, you're the best," giving her a nice kiss.

"Hey - what about me?" Sarah said in a pouty voice.

"What about you - you're nobody special, just my future mother-in-law and teaser of all men, and women, of all shapes and sizes," I grabbed her and gave her a kiss.

I went back over to K who was now awaiting her turn.

"Close your eyes, K - turn around," I said.

She did and I grabbed her from behind and gave her a really gnarly kiss on the back of her neck.

"Oooooooohhhhhh, Charles - that was nice," she slurred and smiled.

I looked outside and saw the dance floor was still up so I took Kalista out there and we worked on the dances we'd previously choreographed, using a boom box on a stool, as we had so many times before.