Chris and Luke

Luke's eyes widened at the vehemence with which she spoke and then he squared his shoulders and nodded. "You're right. I'm sorry."

In the end it didn't matter. Chris was dozing when they went back, exhausted by the previous day's exertions and that morning's emotions. He woke with a smile but he couldn't sustain it long and it was hard to get him up and dressed because he was so weak. Many times Luke and Amy exchanged glances knowing that, no matter what they told each other, and Chris, this was way more than his usual tiredness from a day at the hospital. One way or another, this was the end.

Chris slept soundly for the whole journey and Luke sat beside him in the most uncomfortable seat in the car, holding his hand.

The Clinic was a huge surprise. It wasn't, as they had expected a medical centre. In face Clinic was not at all the right word for it. The name over the door was 'The Coleridge Institute of Robotic and Nanorobotic Research and Development." Luke and Amy exchanged glances, the bottom dropping out of their world.

Chris barely roused when they unloaded the chair and wheeled it into the cool, spacious lobby. On the far wall, which was the only one in the bright and airy room which was painted a dark matt grey, the logo of the Institute gleamed dull silver. It was a globe with the landmasses infilled with a design that suggested a microchip. The globe was surrounded with larger silver letters saying CIRNRAD.

The receptionist greeted them warmly and, after consulting a computer screen invited them to sit on the comfortable easy chairs scattered around the room while she summoned Dr Forrest.

Amy and Luke perched uncomfortably on the edges of their seats. Chris dozed and Luke held his hand tightly, more afraid than he had ever been, not least because of Chris' sudden and unnatural exhaustion.

Both jumped when a man literally bounced into the lobby with a cheerful greeting to the receptionist, who beamed fondly at him. He was not a young man but he exuded energy in a way that made him seem younger than he was, helped by a boyish grin.

Luke and Amy hastily got to their feet and he looked for a moment as if he was going to hug them. However, instead he shook their hands enthusiastically.

"Hello. Hello. Welcome. Welcome. You must be Mrs Baker and your... friend? Son?" He beamed at Luke who was a little stunned but characteristically stubborn when he said, tersely.

"I'm Chris' boyfriend."

If anything the smile broadened. "Oh wonderful, wonderful. It is such a comfort to have the ones we love around us at times like this." He turned to Chris who had woken at the sound of voices and was peering at him curiously. "And you, of course are Chris, the most important person here today. Well, well, I have heard such a lot about you. All good of course. You have impressed a lot of people."

"I... have?" Chris asked looking even more stunned.

"Indeed. I have been making my own enquiries. I had no more intention of going into this blind than you have. Our work is special, very special and we don't offer it to just anyone. We have to be sure that the people we work with are not going to waste the gift they have been given." He smiled directly at Chris, who couldn't help but smile back.

"Anyway, the lobby is no place to discuss things like this. Come through to my office. We'll be a lot more comfortable there."

The office was large, light and pleasant. In one corner a well dusted case glittered with awards and trophies and the wall behind the desk was covered with framed certificates.

"Well I'm sure you want to know what this is all about and to have as much time as you can to consider the implications for you of the offer we are about to make."

"No." Chris said quietly, surprising everyone. They all looked at him. "I don't need to hear anything, or consider anything. I just want you to do it."

"It's not as simple as that. I have to make sure you understand..."

"Why?"

"Because you may decide that you don't want to proceed. The risks are very high."

"Risks of what?"

For the first time Dr Forrest became very serious. "I am sure you have already been informed that there is a very good chance that you won't survive the procedure."

Chris laughed shortly. "I don't know if you've noticed but if the way I'm feeling now is anything to go by there's a pretty good chance I won't survive the day." He sighed, almost too exhausted to speak. "If you do this then maybe I'll die today. If you don't then I'm sure I'll die tomorrow... or the next day. I don't have long, not long at all."

The doctor looked at him thoughtfully. "No, no you don't. Not long at all. In fact..." He turned to Amy and Luke. "I don't want to make this even more difficult for you than it already is but I suspect that if we don't carry out the procedure soon, and I am talking and hour, two... then I won't be able to do it at all. Maybe it is already too late. I will not attempt the procedure if the end result is inevitable failure."

"I don't know." Amy began.

"But I do." Chris said firmly. "This is my body; my life. I want to do it and I want to do it now. It's my decision and my responsibility."

"But Chris..."

"Look," interjected the doctor, "why don't we get Chris through the initial tests? It may be academic. While my colleagues are doing that we can talk more about the procedure and what it means for Chris and then you can all make an informed decision."

"I have all the information I need." Chris looked up at his mother and Luke with anxious but determined eyes. "Please. I need to do this. I don't want to die, and I'm dying. I know that I am, I can feel it. I don't have long and if there's a chance... Please Luke, I don't want to leave you. I can't hold on any longer and I want... I want to let go and sleep but I can't, I won't, not until the very end but it's close Luke... too close. I want to have a chance. I can't do much, I have no control left, but I can do this."

Chris took a deep breath, fighting the fatigue to stay focussed. "Stay here and talk about it if you want to but you can't stop me going through with it. I'm going to do it no matter what you say, what you 'decide'. But I want us all to be together." He drew himself up as much as he could. "I going to do it, but I don't want to do it alone. I will if I have to but..."

He couldn't say another word because Luke, in tears, had thrown his arms around him, as awkward as it was. "Of course you won't be alone. If you want this so much then there's no way I'd stand in your way. In fact I'd fight to the death for it. I'll be there with you, I swear."

Chris smiled a beautiful, brilliant smile and raised his eyes to his mother.

"I'm not easy about this Chris. I would be lying if I said I was... but you're not a child any more. You're right... it is your decision."

"Thank you." He whispered.

They could have sworn the doctor had tears in his eyes when he turned to the intercom and asked for assistance to take Chris to the medical section for the tests.

When he had gone he sat down and looked thoughtfully at Luke and Amy. "He's a strong willed young man."

Amy nodded, speechless.

"What's going to happen to him?"

"How much do you know about nanorobotics?"

"Nothing at all." Amy said shaking her head.

"Nanites are tiny robots aren't they, microscopic computers."

"Not exactly. They are microscopic but they are more... Think of them as peripherals. Like a wireless mouse or keyboard. They work independently of each other under the direction of a control unit... the computer itself. What we have been researching here is the use of nanites in medicine. What they do effectively is bond to things, organic matter. One of the projects we have been working on is producing nanotechnology that surrounds and binds permanently to tissue, such as cancerous tumours thereby stopping it spreading until it can be removed. We have almost perfected it for large tumours and when we have that fine tuned we will look at whether we can actually break up or shrink the tumour."

He shook his head. "That's beside the point and irrelevant for you today. The other branch of our experimentation and development has been in neurology where the nanites are used to strengthen and rebuild damaged nerves, ganglia and even synaptic bridges. Effectively they bind to the material that still exists and rebuilds what was lost."

"So you just rebuild the damaged the nerves. Make them whole again."

"Not me, the nanites under the control of a pre programmed organic computer. The extent to which the damaged material can be repaired or rebuilt depends on the nature, extent and location of the damage."

"So what... what will you actually do to him?"

"Well... first we'll remove the current neural transponder, which is no longer functioning in any event. Then we replace it with the control unit. It's implanted in the brain stem at the top of the spine and bonds with the neural cortex and the spinal chord. Essentially we site the computer and it puts out roots which anchor it into the brain and spine, it literally 'grows' into the neural sytem."

"That sounds dangerous."

"It is. That's the most dangerous part... but not the only dangerous part. Once the control unit is in place we introduce the nanites. Initially we administer a large concentration to the area immediately around the control unit and they spread out from there. Over the next three days we continue to administer the nanites in continuous suspension intravenously.

"The procedure is a delicate one at every stage. The nanites are invasive and at times will be swarming in dangerous concentrations in critical areas. However, if Chris survives the intial insertion of the control unit and nanite swarm his chances will significantly improve, although he won't be out of danger until the process is completed."

"And that will take three days?"

"It will take as long as it takes. The nanites require certain chemicals to operate. Those chemicals are contained in the solution the nanites will be suspended in, that we will be infusing into Chris." He gave them a hard look and paused. "The chemicals are highly toxic. If we were to inject them into Chris without the nanites they would kill him. The nanites 'feed' on the toxicity and for as long as the nanites are present in the correct balance the chemicals will be safe. By very careful and constant monitoring of the levels of these chemicals in Chris' blood we can identify the moment the nanites stop building and become inert. At that moment the infusions will be stopped and the process will be complete."

"But if you get it even slightly wrong or don't stop it in time then Chris will die."

"Yes."

"The whole process sounds ridiculously dangerous."

"It is."

"And it has never been performed on a human before."

"No. Chris is the first."

"So you don't really know what you're doing."

"Oh I know what I'm doing. I know exactly what I'm doing. I just haven't tested it."

"There are so many things that might go wrong."

"Might and probably will."

Both Amy and Luke winced. "And if it doesn't? If it doesn't go wrong what will Chris... what can we expect at the end of it?"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you, not precisely. The range of outcomes is enormous. It depends on precisely what the damage is, where it's concentrated, how severe it is... In some areas the procedure can make the damage worse if the nanites swarm in very delicate areas such as certain parts of the brain. It's impossible to predict at the outset with the equipment currently at our disposal.

"The only thing that there is no question about is that if Chris survives the procedure he will live out his natural lifespan. The doubt comes with regard to the nature and extent of the improvement in his physical and/or mental condition. That can range from minimal, or even negative to total recovery."

"You mean he could get better, completely better?" Luke asked excitedly.

"You mean he could live for years like he is now or worse?" Amy gasped.

The doctor smiled at them both. "That's the gamble. If he survives the procedure he will have a normal lifespan but how he is able to spend it..."

"What's the absolute worst case?"

"Physically I would anticipate an inevitable improvement, albeit a small one. Mentally he might deteriorate. He might be unable to speak, to process information, have memory impairment, mood swings."

"You mean he might be brain damaged, might now know us or be able to communicate with us?"

"It's a possibility."

"How much of a possibility?

"A real one but not a significant one."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that at the moment this is an experimental procedure and therefore an imprecise science. What I am offering Chris is a chance, not a certainty."

"I understand that but... It's a whole different scenario if we are no longer looking at just life or death. In some ways a non life is worse."

"I agree... but that's the chance."

"I don't know... I..."

"We don't have a choice Mrs B. This is what Chris wants."

"But he doesn't know the full story."

"Do you think it would make any difference if he did?"

She looked at him for a moment and then shook her head sadly. "No. I know it wouldn't."

"There's just one more thing."

"Yes Luke?"

"If it works, if Chris gets better will it... I mean will he be safe? It won't come back will it?"

"No, it won't come back. The modifications will completely eradicate the virus. The neural computer will continue to be ''online' for some time and will ensure the absolute stability of the modifications. If there are any specific problems we can, within a limited range, reprogram it to carry out additional or alternative work.

"Of course it isn't possible to guarantee that he will never get ill again. People get ill, sometimes they get very ill and sometimes they die. Chris won't be superhuman. Decay and sickness won't attack the modifications but the modifications don't extend to all of his body. He'll get ill. He'll be hurt. He'll be completely normal in that respect."

"I see. Can we go to him now?"

"It will take a little while for the tests to be completed. We have to be absolutely sure that the modifications are suitable for Chris and, if so calculate the precise levels and doses for his body. We have already had a lot of information from his medical records but there are some things we have to do for ourselves. Give us half an hour. Go and have a coffee in the canteen, or walk in the grounds."

It was the longest half hour of their lives. They couldn't look at each other and they couldn't speak to each other. They simply sat and stared into their coffee until it was time to return. It wasn't as if they were no longer comfortable with each other or were angry with each other... it was that they only had one thing to talk about and it wasn't what either of them wanted to hear.

Dr Forrest was waiting for them in his office. He smiled. "Well, I have good news, although I'm not sure you will see it exactly that way. The tests have confirmed that Chris is suitable for the procedure... if it is performed immediately. Any delay and the deterioration will be too far advanced, maybe it already is. We're right on the wire but close enough to the right side to make it worth trying."

"What if you don't...? What if we hadn't come here? If we were somewhere else and we didn't know about this?"

"There's no point thinking like that."

"No. I need to know. If we walked away from here right now, what would happen to Chris?"

"You know what would happen, Luke."

"But how...how soon?"

"If we don't perform the procedure within the next two hours then when Chris goes to sleep tonight he won't be waking up again and within the next three days he will be gone."

"Three days? But..."

"I'm sorry."

"Then let's do it. Can we see him now?"

"Of course. He's been very... insistent. We've gone ahead and carried out the preparations for the procedure. You can stay with him for a while to... prepare yourselves."

"Say goodbye you mean."

"Do whatever you have to do."

They followed the doctor along a corridor and through a set of double doors then took a sharp left and followed another corridor which seemed to be leading into another building or at least a very strictly defined part of the current one.

"This is a research facility right?"

"That's right."

"Researching robots and stuff?"

"In a way, yes."

"Then..."

Dr Forrest stopped and looked at Luke. "What's the problem?"

"I'm not... Look, no offence but... You're all about robots, how are you going to... you know... look after Chris? Are you even a real doctor?"

"No offence taken Luke. In fact I'm surprised that you haven't raised the question sooner. In answer... yes I am a real doctor, a medical one, as are two of my colleagues. Others are scientists, computer experts and engineers. Our research leads us down many avenues.

"The emphasis of our current research is medical in nature and we have the very best facilities. The medical wing is far better equipped than most hospitals and there's one on one care. You have nothing to fear. Chris will have the very best of attention."

"But why? I mean Chris is your first human subject; why do you have the facilities, the equipment..."

Dr Forrest smiled at him indulgently.

"Because he won't be the last."

"And I can stay with him? The whole time?"

"You can stay with him until it's time to begin the procedure. You won't be able to be with him while we're working on him."

"But..."

"Luke, the operation is a delicate one. It's performed under strict operating theatre conditions. Would you expect to be allowed into an operating theatre in a normal hospital?"

"No."

"I promise that you can spend every moment possible with him. You can stay with him right up until we take him into theatre and you can be waiting right there when he comes out."

"If he does."

"Take it as it comes. It's important that you keep him as calm as possible and don't let your own fears affect him if you can help it."

"So how soon...?"

"We're ready; Chris is ready. He just wants to spend a little time with you before we start. I know you want to have as much time as you can but really the sooner we start the better."

"But I thought..."

"The sooner the better, Luke; it will give you less time to brood."

"So what are we looking at? And hour? Half an hour?"

"Five or ten minutes."

"Ten minutes but... but that's not enough."

"Anything you need to say can be said in ten minutes. Every minute that passes increases the risk, and I know you don't want that."

"No. No I don't want that."

The medical unit was, in many ways very similar to the rest of the facility in that it was light, bright and airy. There was little evidence of any activity in the large open room filled with filing cabinets; trolleys filled with files and notes; tables covered with folders, files and notes; an enormous amount of computer technology and 'gadgets' and a large depression in the centre accessed by steps and lined with overflowing book cases.

It didn't really look 'medical' at all, more like a very hi tech and untidy library.

To one side of the library was a large set of double doors through which Dr Forrest led them. Beyond was a short corridor with two doors on either side. Dr Forrest paused outside one.

"I'll leave you alone for as long as I can but you know the situation."

"I want to sit with him for hours but yes, we know the situation. Just give us a few minutes."

"You'll find him very sleepy. Partly because he's almost completely exhausted and partly because we've sedated him in preparation for the procedure. He won't be completely anaesthetised as it would be just too dangerous and not necessary but he's had heavy doses of a muscle relaxant which you appreciate is vital, strong painkillers and a mild sedative. We will deepen that during the procedure itself but he won't be asleep for long."