Cockweasel Meets The King

Cockweasel swallowed. He'd heard that the orc king had survived the defeat of the orcish armies and had gone into hiding. Apparently this was his hideout. Cockweasel was screwed.

"I...er... I'm not sure I..." Cockweasel squeaked and stammered. He was pretty sure he was about to be a dead little goblin and he couldn't see a likely escape.

Shag'gash gave a rumbling growl that silenced Cockweasel's stammering. "You were claiming you were responsible for the defeat of my army."

Cockweasel frowned. There was a squelching noise coming from behind the desk, evidently Jenn was giving her king one of her fantastic blowjobs. Cockweasel was sure going to miss her pretty mouth.

Shag'gash continued. "You know the whereabouts of the orc defector? Kum Foulfang?"

Cockweasel swallowed. "Who? Never heard of him."

Shag'gash looked furious. "Cut off the goblin's nose," he snapped at his guards.

Cockweasel squealed as one of the guards roughly seized him from behind, the tall one. The stockier guard pulled a long, jagged knife from his belt and held it up to Cockweasel's face, resting it against his cheek, the shard tip touching the side of Cockweasel's nose.

"Wait!" shrieked Cockweasel, he wasn't exactly pretty, but still he figured that being noseless wouldn't help with the ladies. "I...er... I remember Foulfang now."

"Good," Shag'gash grinned, showing his sharp fangs. There was still a diligent slurping noise coming from under the desk as Jenn sucked off the large king of the orcs. "Where is he?"

"He's..."

There was suddenly a crash as the door burst open and several armoured figures launched into the room. At the head of the group of soldiers was none other than Lady Gwendallyn in full platemail, her visor up and her longsword drawn.

"It's over King Darktusk!" she announced, levelling her sword at the orc king as more soldier's flooded into the room behind her. The two orc guards that were holding Cockweasel froze, the stocky one still had his knife in Cockweasel's face.

Gwendallyn saw Cockweasel for the first time. "Cockweasel? What on earth are you doing here?" She seemed shocked to see the goblin.

Cockweasel shrugged. "Capturing the orc king for you," he replied with a grin.

Before the surprised paladin could reply, King Shag'gash interrupted them. "If you don't let me go, the goblin dies."

Gwendallyn turned back to the orc king, her eyes narrowing. "I don't think so Darktusk."

Shag'gash scowled in irritation and gestured casually to his guards. "Kill him."

Cockweasel gave a squawk and squeezed his eyes shut as the jagged knife flashed across his face. To his surprise he didn't die though. The tall guard behind him gave a gurgled grunt as the knife stabbed up under his helm and he slumped to the floor, blood gushed from a gaping wound in his throat.

Cockweasel's eyes snapped back open and in front of him the stocky orc guard pulled off his helmet.

"Foulfang?" blurted Cockweasel in surprise as he saw the familiar orcish face.

"Hey Cockweasel," replied the orc with a toothy grin. "You surprised the shit out of me when Raventail showed up with you."

Cockweasel was still in shock, but rather happy to be alive. He could only manage a startled nod.

"His bitch Raventail is under the desk," Foulfang said to Gwendallyn.

The beautiful blonde paladin nodded and she approached the desk along with two other soldiers, her sword at the ready. As the soldiers seized King Shag'gash and tied him up, Gwendallyn looked under the desk and frowned.

"There's no-one there," she announced.

Cockweasel gaped in surprise. "What? That's impossible." He hurried over to check for himself, but sure enough there was no sign of Jenn Raventail. The mysterious buxom brunette had vanished.

"Don't worry," Gwendallyn told him. "Darktusk was our main target."

Cockweasel gave a slightly worried nod. "What are you doing here anyway? I though Lord Jontar had sent you off on some mission."

Gwendallyn nodded. "This is the mission. Me and Foulfang had a lead to track down the orc king. More to the point, what are you doing here Cockweasel?"

The goblin gave a sigh. "It's a long story..."

THE END