Contractual Obligation Ch. 05bydarkestnight©
Chapter 5: Sexuality Redefined
Those initial days were soon far behind me. I dressed and put on makeup every day, continued to practice everything that I had been taught and started seeing a doctor twice a week. My dose of hormones was altered and I began receiving injections that suppressed testosterone. I began to see changes shortly after, subtle but obvious to me, especially since I spent such an inordinate amount of time studying my own face on a daily basis.
It's hard to explain. There was a softening of the skin at first, as if my pores shrunk. The oily skin problem gradually went away and I didn't have to compensate as much. I could've argued that my new cleaning regimen made that happen but regardless, it was an exciting improvement. I was also prone to some mood swings and during my lows, it was hard not to be snippy, even with Miss Dupont.
Luckily, she was understanding but I could tell that a few times, she wanted to say something. The changes my body was being forced through were profound enough that I wasn't really in control, things hadn't completely stabilized yet. It would be a while but there was an opposite side to those mopey, angry moments. My highs were amazing. It was like I was on top of the world and nothing could ever go wrong.
Much as I enjoyed those exalted moments, I would have preferred to live somewhere in the middle. The doctor ensured me that I would likely still have some impressive moods but they would be mostly contained. I have to hand it to that guy, he was really an amazing person and more caring than any physician that I had ever met. His bedside manner was fantastic but perhaps that was because my restrictive diet and exercise routine was carefully managed. It's easy to be pleased when your patient has no choice but to follow your instructions to the very finest detail.
There were two other things that I began to notice in terms of body changes. First, some parts of my body seemed to grow hair a lot slower. This was amazing because I didn't have to worry as much about keeping it trim. My chest at first then my arms. I probably would never know about my legs, I groomed them the moment I felt stubble and my abdomen was equally kept clean of any pubic hair.
The second thing was my breasts. They didn't substantially grow but they my nipples became more sensitive, a little more pronounced. I first realized it when I was in the bath one night and brushed the sponge over one of them and jumped. That first nudge was unpleasant because the sensation was too severe, too stimulating. Being more careful was nicer, exciting even...especially since my nipples had never been particularly sensitive before.
Exercise had changed my body shape. I lost the fat I had in some places and was getting ever so slightly curvier. It was barely noticeable to anyone but me. I could only tell by the way my clothes fit and in the back of my mind, I realized that I'd be changing my wardrobe before I was completely done. The fact was that once the doctor said I was on a stable amount of hormones and ready for the next step, I'd be able to start in on some of the scarier parts of my journey: surgery.
The first would be breast enlargement and that both thrilled and terrified me. One afternoon, my physician let me know that the surgery was scheduled two weeks out and gave me a routine that I should start to follow in preparation for it. It came out of the blue and though I was desperately excited for it, I was also scared to the point of tears. I didn't sleep for two days while I stressed about it and couldn't tell how much of my struggle was hormonal and how much of it was mental.
It seemed too soon to me but when I asked Miss Dupont about how long I had already been there, she told me eight months.
Eight months! It had slipped by so swiftly, so eventfully that I didn't even know I had been working on being a woman for more than half a year. I couldn't believe it. My training had been so intense, my practice and daily routines so severe that I had lost the days. They flowed together as one continual sacrifice for my future self. I couldn't have said what one day was like to the next but the results were more and more obvious. Looking in the mirror, I figured that I had achieved more than a year's worth of progress. With such dogged determination, I had to be well ahead of schedule.
"You have less than ten days before you're going to be out of commission for a while," Miss Dupont said to me one evening before bed. We hadn't put on the chastity device yet. "I'm here to start you on something a little new."
"Isn't it...I mean, shouldn't anything wait til after the surgery?"
"No, this shouldn't wait anymore. I should've already started you on it by now in fact." She had her little box with her again and as she set it down, I wondered what new insanity she had in store. "There are two things I want you thinking about for the next month: oral pleasure and giving your body up for...well...other pleasure."
"To be the toy," I said.
"Precisely. It's time to pay attention to those pornographic videos, all while wearing the chastity device of course." She grinned. "I want you to be aroused at the thought of putting a penis in your mouth but it has to be pent up...it has to be a passion you direct away from yourself and into the person you're pleasing. You're to take your rapture from giving them release. Do you understand?"
"I think so."
"Good." She opened the box and withdrew a long black strap on complete with veins and a bulbous head that made my eyes bulge. "You're going to become very familiar with this device, Cecile. It'll know you intimately inside and out. You'll taste it...feel it press into your little pussy hole...and when you have breasts and they're healed, it'll slide between them soaked in your spit. You'll service it like a real man, learning before your first real experience...but all in due time."
My breath came a little quicker at her description of events. I felt trapped and thrilled at the same time. I had to go through with this or lose the contract. I wanted to...I didn't want to. I needed to...I had to...I felt my mouth water...some part of me craved it, desperately wanted to give myself to the benefactor. It was as if I felt that I could repay him with my body, with the thing that he helped create.
Or did create...
He was responsible for so many decisions. Was I his creation? Or was the person I should've been someone he could see when I walked into the house eight months ago? Did he look at me and realize he could coax out a new person or did he see something malleable to mold as he saw fit? I couldn't tell what would excite me more. Owned or beckoned...possessed or repressed...
I was still dressed in a pair of pantyhose and a long silky skirt. My top was a blouse and now, I had taken to wearing jewelry. My ears were even pierced, an experience that was over so fast I barely even remembered it had been done. I had styled my lengthening hair in waves and my makeup was flawless. Miss Dupont admired me for a long moment as she slid the strap on up her slender legs and buckled it at her hip.
"Get on your knees," she said. "I'm going give you your first lesson on how to give a blow job."
Her words made me tremble and I just nodded my reply, eyes cast down.
"First off, look up at me. Eye to eye. I want you to think about that...gaze at the person that's giving you the gift of their cock. It's an important thing to remember. They're letting you have something you need to treat as special. Your eyes should thank them every second that you're down there. Understand?"
I looked up at her, met her gaze and nodded slowly, scooting closer so that the black strap on was mere inches from my face.
"Grip the base of my shaft with your hand and tease it." I reached up and wrapped my fingers around the stiff, hard member. It had no give, none of the fleshy reality of even my cock but I couldn't help but feel thrilled by holding it. Despite the fact that it wasn't real, there was still intimacy and it aroused me to my core.
I leaned forward and kissed the tip, kissing around the head. At first, I tried to imagine what I would like if I were a man but I dispelled those thoughts immediately. I didn't have a cock, I had a clit. A clit was excited differently. I had to approach this as a woman...as someone that wanted to give pleasure but could only imagine what it felt like to have a penis. I put myself in that opposite role and tried to be natural.
I circled the head with my lips and prodded it with my tongue. Miss Dupont cooed encouragement to me, petting my hair. "Take it now, Cecile. Slide it into your mouth."
The head popped in first. It tasted like rubber but there was texture: pronounced veins, the contour from head to shaft. I could feel it all on the roof of my mouth and on the top of my tongue. I lowered myself down, letting it pass the half way point and pausing. Any further and I'd be touching the back of my throat and I wasn't even three quarters of the way down that cock. Miss Dupont nodded to me.
"Use more of your lips. Get it wet. You're not taking much more with it dry. Think about that for your pussy too. You'll need to get this thing lubed up if you plan on getting fucked by it."
The vulgarity of her statement caused me to twitch. I couldn't believe the thoughts that rushed through my head. I wanted it inside me. I wanted to feel this beast sliding in and out of my pussy, fucking the hell out of me with all the abandon that Miss Dupont could muster. I wanted her to hold my ankles and spread my legs, expose me and take me like a real slut.
All this and more compelled me on. I became another person, gripping that cock tightly as I slid up and down on it, giving it the blow job of a lifetime. More lips, less teeth, more sucking, less tentativeness. In ten minutes, she was fucking my mouth and I was nearly taking her all the way in. She was letting me build up to it, smiling the whole time.
"I want you to try to take it all the way in," she said. "I want you to really concentrate and start doing it. Men go wild when you can deep throat."
Fear tickled the back of my head but my arousal fended it off. I was so turned on by what I was learning, I tried it right away, pressing forward hard to get it down there, swallowing as I did. It didn't work, first pass was a failure and I fell back gasping. The cock was coated in my spit which had to have made it easier. I tried again immediately. Tears formed in my eyes, running down my face. I felt my face turning red...my body sweating.
My eyes went wide...it was in.
Panic made me draw back out but Miss Dupont clapped her hands. "Very good!" I was back at it. "You're going to try again? My, you are a little wanton aren't you?"
I was determined to do it and keep it there for a moment. I wanted to count to three...whatever it took, I wouldn't pass out or draw back. This was my moment to get something right the first time and I'd practice it every fucking day if I had to in order to keep that skill up and get better at it.
This time, it was so slick it slipped right in. I closed my eyes and concentrated, holding my breath and letting it fill me up. The damn thing's lack of give made it a lot harder to tolerate but with a lot of discipline, I was able to let my mind wander somewhere else. I was counting in my mind, one...two...three...four...
Five whole seconds I made it before I drew back, gasping for air and coughing.
"That's enough," Miss Dupont said, stopping me from trying again. "I think you're ready for the next step, don't you?"
Without a word, I crawled up on the bed and flopped on my back. I spread my legs and exposed myself, slipping the pantyhose down along with my underwear. The initial breeze in the room tickled my clitty and my ass. I shivered as Miss Dupont took my undergarments off completely including my shoes. She stepped forward, caressing my leg with one hand while guiding that massive tool with the other.
I felt it press at my ass and I thought about my frequent enemas that had prepared me for this moment...the massive wedge she had used on me when she milked my cock and now this...a phallus used to train me to take the real thing. Her eyes stared into mine and there was two emotions there: kindness and arousal. This was turning her on too! She was just as excited as me, if not more so!
Before I could even open my mouth to say anything, she slid the slipper thing into me, pressing hard enough to get the head to pop in. I willed myself to open up for her, letting her plunge in deeper. Each time she drew back she was able to push further in. I thought I would be split in half. I could make out every contour and crevice, every vein and curve. This was a massive cock that impaled me and all I could do was groan.
It took her seven passes to get the entire thing in. I was so full I thought I'd burst and when her hips touched my ass, I started to gasp and tense up. I gripped the bed covers and curled my toes. It was painful...it was exciting...it was delightful...it was everything I wanted. She began to fuck me, groaning herself as the speed escalated.
My clitty twitched with every pass and each time she drove all the way in, I swore a little tiny bit of cum squirted out. I looked up at her through narrow eyes and saw that she was sweating. One hand gripped my hip tightly, digging her nails into my skin. The other teased one of her nipples through her shirt. Her body tensed and trembled. I saw her expression tighten. Her brows furrowed.
"Oh..." she moaned, having a tiny orgasm at my cunt's expense...my ass pussy that was hers to use.
She collapsed to her knees and in so doing, pulled straight out of me. The abruptness made me whimper. I suddenly felt empty and hollow. She had filled me so well that now, I missed it...what I thought was pain was clearly pleasure, what I thought was bursting was perfection. I wanted to beg her to take me again but I could barely speak.
Perhaps that was all a little more than I was ready to take. Perhaps we should've found a way to take it slower but she was the boss and she did things her way. I just went along with it and reaped the rewards or suffered the consequences. This time, I think I got more of the former than the latter.
"You'll practice on a dildo," she said. "Watch porn." The chastity device was secured in place. "Think like a woman. Analyze like a lady. Decide how best to pleasure a man. When you're done with your breasts, the benefactor has authorized a real man to come in here...a chance for you to enjoy real cum."
My heart skipped a beat. "But...I thought that he wanted to..."
"Marry you?" she asked with a grin. "He does. But he acknowledges that you may have had other lovers in your past. You'll be exclusive when he says. Until then, he wants a trained bride...not a clumsy virgin. You'll learn...and you'll experience...and you'll love. That's the goal. So prepare for it. Make that man the happiest person on the planet when he puts his cock in your mouth.
"That's what you're good for, right?"
"Yes," I agreed, meaning it on a level I didn't know existed. "Yes it is."