Explorations Ch. 08byReardon1©
Author's note: Thanks for all the great feedback and suggestions. A note I received, with some great suggestions, inspired part of this chapter. Thanks for reading.
Jessica made her way to the student center to pick up her mail. She had just had lunch with a few of her teammates on the volleyball team and was on her way to her calculus class - an unfortunate prerequisite for graduation. When she got to the wall of small mailboxes she looked through the clear door to see that she had several pieces of mail waiting for her.
It was always a good day when mail arrived. Perhaps a letter from her brother, professing his desire for her; maybe a letter from her good friend Mary, telling her what she's been up to; or maybe one of them would be a card from a relative, wishing her good luck for the semester.
There were three envelopes. Jessica flipped through each to see if there was anything worth keeping: a telephone bill, an envelope that had no return address, and a letter from her mother. She looked at her watch, stuffed the bill and letter from her mom in her backpack, and opened the mystery envelope.
Inside was an invitation. The heavy stock card was cream colored with a black border and a crimson, cursive-styled typeface. Jessica started to walk to the main academic building for her class as she read. It was an invitation from Jennifer's "sorority" to a party.
As she sat in her seat for class, her thoughts drifted to the party she had attended at the same house last semester - a glancing kiss on the neck by her friend, the sexual tension of their dance, and the palpable heat from Jen's housemate, Diane. Jessica wasn't sure what their story was, but she was sure she wanted to find out.
After class, Jessica went to the student center and sat on a couch where she could read the letter from her mother. She pulled the plain envelope out of her bag and traced her fingers along the return address.
Two weeks after returning to school from Christmas exodus, Jessica made a weekend trip home. Her goal was to ensure that what had transpired between her and her mother was not a one-time occurrence. That weekend, mother and daughter continued their taboo relationship, as Jessica brought her mother to the heights of orgasmic bliss again and again. Sunday afternoon before she left for campus, Jessica told her mother that she was to refrain from pleasuring herself or from any sexual act until she gave her permission. Jessica wanted to deny her release, bringing her mother to the point where she would do anything for that moment of ecstasy. Jessica knew that her mother could easily "cheat" on her, but she had a feeling that she wanted it this way; that she craved being told what to do; that she would not be satisfied unless her daughter gave her permission to release her building sexual frustration.
Jessica ripped open the envelope and opened the letter:
It's been almost three weeks since your visit. I can hardly understand how this has happened. I've had moments of weakness – times when I thought I was crazy. Times when I thought I was a horrible person for letting this happen. Times when I stood under the shower and wanted to touch myself but didn't. I have done as you said. I beg you to let me pleasure myself. Your mommy needs it so badly! I could do it and you'd never know, but I won't do it without your consent.
All my love,
As Jessica read the letter, she could hardly contain the broad smile that came to her face. This could not have gone better, she thought. She would call her mother tonight.
* * * *
After a light dinner, a grueling volleyball practice, and another snack of granola and yogurt to quench her body's need for fuel, Jessica got back to her dorm room where her roommate, Yun was lying on her bed reading. Yun placed the book down and asked Jessica how her day was. After giving a short synopsis of the day's events, Jessica lay on her bed.
"I need to make a phone call," Jessica said as she reached for her cell phone. Seeing the inquisitive look on Yun's face, Jessica answered the question on her mind. "It's someone who's been begging me to give her some attention."
Jessica had told Yun about her sexual appetite and multiple lovers a couple of weeks into their relationship. From the beginning, Yun knew what she was getting into – this was not a normal relationship. For her it was a time of exploration. What she got out of her relationship with Jessica outweighed any jealousy she might feel from time to time. She accepted what Jessica gave her, knowing that it was probably a temporary fling for both of them. In fact, although Jessica was vague about her other relationships, Yun enjoyed hearing about her roommate's conquests. It made for great foreplay listening to the vivid details of Jessica's exploits with her mystery partners. All she knew was that she had a male lover and had recently added another female to the mix. The male lover didn't bother her. Yun herself noticed the attention she was receiving from one of the boys in her computer lab. A result, Yun thought, of her new found confidence and look. A tinge of jealousy did surface when Jessica told her she had another woman she was seeing in her hometown.
Jessica dialed and waited for an answer. "It's me," Jessica said. Yun lay silently listening to the one-sided conversation, trying to discern what the other person was saying. "Yes," Jessica answered, "I got your letter today. Are you busy? Where are you? Go up to your bedroom." Yun realized what Jessica was about to do and was drawn in.
"Tell me what you want. I'm sure you do. What would you do for me if I were there?" Jessica laughed softly. "You dirty little MILF. Take off your clothes…put the phone on speaker and get on the bed in a doggie position. Get down on your elbows and raise your butt up in the air. Hmm…I love it when you're like that – exposed and vulnerable for me. If I were there I would spank that beautiful butt. Why don't you slap your ass…harder, I want to hear it. Again. Again."
Jessica relaxed her legs, letting her knees fall open, and began touching her breasts through her thin blouse. "Hearing your skin get spanked makes me so hot. I can picture your red flesh. Would you want me to lick it and make it better? Lie on your back and touch your beautiful tits…slap them. Good girl."
Jessica closed her eyes and began gyrating her body, enjoying her complete domination over the woman. Yun walked over to Jessica's bed and lay by her feet, listening intently. She reached out and touched Jessica's ankle, stroking her soft skin. "Pinch your nipples," Jessica ordered. "Pull them away from your body. That's a good slut." Jessica wanted to feel Yun's tongue on her while she played with her mother; she unbuttoned her jeans. Yun helped her pull them off, revealing her white panties, and noticed the moist cotton covering her slit.
Jessica pushed her panties to the side, exposing her sex, and she spread the pink lips, nodding to her roommate. A tingling sensation coursed through Yun's body as she kissed her way down Jessica's thigh, tasting her skin on her tongue, getting off on this virtual threesome.
As Yun's tongue grazed her inner thigh, Jessica moaned softly. When she reached her pussy, covering it lightly with her flattened tongue and slowly moved in a small circle, Jessica let out a gasp. "Oh…yes….I'm getting serviced by my roommate. She's so good at it. You should see how cute she is. Her body is so petite; her ass is small and tight, and her tiny pussy can barely take my fingers. Touch yourself. I want to hear you come for me."
Jessica groaned again as Yun became more urgent with her lovemaking, probing her stiffened tongue into Jessica's hole as she rubbed her clit with her thumb. Jessica gave in to her body's needs as she listened to her mother pleasure herself. The combination of her mother's desperate cries hitting her ear, the sound of Yun's moans between her legs, and the sensation of the warm tongue on her sex left her riding a crest of pleasure that fulfilled her need for sexual domination.
"Put a finger in your hole," she said to her mother. "Fuck yourself while you rub your clit." A moment later, she heard her mother take in a sharp breath.
Yun's mouth was relentless, her tongue dipping steadily into Jessica's pussy, her mouth taking in and sucking on her exposed clit, her hands reaching up to caress her breasts. Jessica felt a stirring deep inside her body begin to build. Her eyes closed, she felt it come closer and closer to the surface. It came like the rising tide – a small crest of water hitting the beach, then a larger one, a larger one – each successive wave exerting more force until the first massive tidal crashed against her, crushing Jessica under its weight.
"Fuck!" she hissed into the phone. Yun wrapped her arms around Jessica's thighs, pinning her knees to her chest. A second, larger wave crashed the shore and Jessica grunted, clutching the phone in her hand. Her mother was coming on the other end, screaming out her name, as the waves came more quickly now, one after another, each with more weight than the last. Jessica reached down and felt Yun's long hair between her fingers and held her face against her body, coaxing as much as she could out of the girl's tongue. As Jessica heard her mother come down from her orgasm, she felt a final wave approach. Her back arched as she held her breath; her legs instinctively wrapped tightly around Yun's back; her muscles clenched under the strain. A high-pitched scream escaped her lips as her body slammed to the mattress, convulsing under the crushing blow.
Jessica looked down at Yun and smiled. "Good girl," she said into the phone, speaking to both of her lovers. "I've got to go. I'll talk to you soon. Goodnight."
"Baby, that was so amazing," Jessica said as she pulled Yun next her, wrapping her long legs around the girl's small frame. She placed her hands on Yun's face, stroking her hair. The afterglow kept her in a high state of arousal as she looked at the thin, slightly parted lips of her lover. She traced her thumb along the outline of Yun's mouth, feeling the body in her arms quiver at her touch. She felt a need to connect with Yun begin to grow in the pit of her stomach. She leaned in and tickled the edge of Yun's lips with her tongue, softly caressing the upper lip, then moving down, slowly sucking the lower lip into her mouth. She felt more than heard Yun moan as she penetrated her with her tongue, exploring, searching for her lover's tongue and finding it.
Still locked in a passionate embrace, Jessica rolled Yun onto her back, gently pinning her arms above her head. Reflexively, Yun opened her legs and wrapped them around Jessica's butt, pushing Jessica against her sex with her heels. Continuing to make love to the girl's mouth, Jessica reached down and deftly pulled off Yun's pajama bottoms, exposing her body and grinding her sex against Yun's, savoring the sensation of their clits kissing each other. Jessica released the arms she held in her grip long enough to lift off Yun's shirt, allowing her full access to the body she was crushing under the weight of her desire.
"You're so good to me," Jessica said as she looked down at Yun.
Jessica continued to grind her body against her, each woman moaning into each other's ears with every thrust. Their arms desperately wrapped around the other's neck, their cheeks pressed together in an intimate embrace, the two young women made love.
As they lay silently, Jessica spooning Yun, her arms holding her close to her body, her face resting gently on Yun's burning cheek, Jessica whispered, "I love you like a little sister." She chuckled. "…a little sister that shares my bed."
Yun turned around to face her roommate, enveloping Jessica's lower body with her thin legs. Jessica stared at Yun's furrowed brow, trying to read her thoughts as Yun leaned in and kissed her ever so gently on the lips and closed her eyes. Lost inside each other's urgent need to be close to each other, they fell asleep on Jessica's small, twin bed.
* * * *
That Friday, Jessica ran into Diane and Jennifer walking from the cafeteria. She wanted to find out what the party she had been invited to was all about and approached them.
"Hey, Jen," she said as she came from behind them.
"Hey, you remember Diane?" Jen asked.
"Of course. Um…I have a question about this party you invited me to tonight. Do you guys have a minute?"
"Yeah," Jen answered. "We're done for the day."
"So what's this about anyway? I'd like to have some clue before I commit to anything." The three women sat on a bench halfway between the student center and the library.
Jen looked over at Diane for approval. Diane nodded her consent. "Well," Jennifer began, "I guess the best way to describe it is that we explore our sexuality."
"Okay," Jessica said, still confused.
Diane clarified it for Jessica. "I founded the sisterhood to explore the role of dominance and submission in sexual relationships. We try to find girls who we think might be interested, like you, and then invite them to join."
"What exactly would membership entail?" Jessica asked, intrigued but skeptical.
"If accepted as a pledge, or as we call it, a novice, you'd be trained for about three months on how to be a submissive. You would sleep at our house on the weekends when most of the training occurs. By the end, you would be well-versed on how to pleasure the sisters, how to submit to authority, and how to properly take punishment."
Jessica's jaw dropped open in astonishment.
"Once initiated, you would be subservient to all members your senior and dominant over all members your junior." Diane smiled. "Of course, the first semester or so, you would be the low woman on the totem pole; you would need to be submissive to all six of us and at the mercy of our whims."
"I don't know…" Jessica's voice trailed off.
Jennifer quickly jumped in. "You don't have to make a decision now. You can come tonight and see if it's something you want to do. Trust me, as the lowest member as of right now, I love being dominated by five beautiful women. Plus, I know that eventually I'll be the one on top."
"So, you really have to do whatever the others tell you?" Jessica asked, looking first at Jennifer then Diane.
Diane answered for Jen. "Not exactly. We do have boundaries, rules, and we always utilize a safe word. But, in essence, yes. If I were to tell Jen to reach under her skirt and touch herself right here, she would do it, wouldn't you?"
Jessica looked at her friend. "Yes, Mistress."
"If I were to order you to get on your knees to show how much you're devoted to me, you would, wouldn't you?"
Jessica felt a tingling between her legs.
"Yes, Mistress," Jen answered.
"I knew," Diane said, looking at Jessica, "that you would be open to D/s play not too long after we met. I can read people that way. The question is, are you willing to start on the bottom before reaching the top?"
Jessica thought about that question for a moment. Could she relinquish control of her sex life at this point in her life? If she couldn't, what did that say about her? She thought about her brother and his devotion to her; she thought about Yun, the unexpected lover that she cared for deeply; and she thought about her mother, her ultimate conquest. All of those relationships would have to be suspended. That was something she was not willing to do.
"I can't," Jessica began. "I-I'm not ready. I'm in…I have…" She struggled to find the words. "I'm in a D/s relationship now where I'm the dominant one. As a matter of fact, I have three submissive lovers. I can't commit to this. Perhaps someday, but not now."
Diane was impressed. "Three, huh? How delicious! Are they all females?"
She looked at both of them and answered. "Two women, one man."
Diane took out a piece of paper from her bag and wrote something. "As you know, I'm graduating this May. But, I'm staying in the San Francisco area. This is my cell number. I've had it for years, and I don't plan on changing it." She stood and Jennifer followed suit. "When you're ready, give me a call."
One month had passed. It was Saturday night and Jessica and Yun had just returned home from a movie. As they walked back to their dorm, Jessica blurted out, "I need to tell you something. We need to talk when we get back."
Yun was nervous from the tone of Jessica's voice. Does she not want this anymore? Does she not want me anymore? Is she going to finally tell me more about her other lovers?
That night, Jessica lay on her bed with her laptop and wrote her mother an email, asking when she had a free weekend. As she typed, she allowed her mind to drift, thinking about she, Yun, and her mother together. What deviant things can I come up with for the two of them to do? She looked over at Yun who was finishing up a writing assignment. Jessica read over her email then clicked send. She walked over to Yun's desk and asked, "Are you finished? I'd like to talk to you about something important."
Yun closed the application she was using and logged off her computer. She took a deep breath, fearing the worst. "What is it, Jess?"
Jessica held out her hand and led Yun to her bed. "First, I need to tell you why I feel the way I do about you." She paused and then began.
"At first, I was attracted to how innocent you were. In high school I hung out with the popular crowd. All of my friends were partiers and we were all sexually active senior year. When I met you, I was drawn to the fact that you weren't like that. Then, when you told me you were a virgin, it just made me want you even more. But, it was more than that. I like to be in control. I like to dominate my lovers. I don't know how to explain it, but I get off on it. I've been like this for as long as I can remember and definitely since I've been sexually active."
Yun felt closer to Jessica with each word. Jessica was letting her in, confiding in her. She let her continue.
"As our relationship progressed, I became more and more attracted to not just being dominant over you sexually, but I wanted to keep you all to myself. You're the first normal lover I've ever had – it's not just about the power; it's about how I feel about you. You're special to me, Yun. That's why I'm going to tell you everything and hope you won't think I'm an awful human being – I couldn't stand it if you did." Jessica could hardly believe the words streaming out of her mouth. Was she really going to let Yun in on her family secret? Would she think I was a freak? Would she ever want to be with me again? I love her. She needs to know the truth.
"Yun, I'm going to tell you everything…I'm going to tell you everything because I…I love you. I love you, baby. I know it's crazy, but it's the truth." Jessica searched Yun's eyes, looking for something, anything before she continued. She saw an understanding smile in her eyes hidden behind a state of shock.
"I'm going to tell you about my other lovers. I'm going to try and explain why I love to dominate those I love – why it makes me hot to have you submit to me. I just hope you'll give me a chance to explain everything before you pass judgment."
Yun was afraid of what Jessica was about to tell her. She tried to calm herself and listen, allowing Jessica to get off her chest what she'd been bottling up. "Tell me, Jess. You know you can trust me."
Jessica took a deep breath. She proceeded to tell Yun about her first sexual experience with her high school boyfriend, Justin, and how she enjoyed toying with him, making him do what she wanted. She told her how she realized early on that in order for her to fully enjoy sex, there had to be a dominant/submissive relationship, and that she loved being the one in control.