Fated Ch. 18

One nice benefit of having rather small breasts is that I do not necessarilyneedto wear a bra all the time. I had never particularly cared for seeing a girl or a woman wearing something with spaghetti straps and also seeing the straps of her bra on her shoulders, and as I looked at myself in the mirror, I smiled to myself, for the spaghetti straps of my tank top were the only things on my shoulders.

"Nice," Eric commented as he stepped into the bathroom. We shared a warm smile, and I realized then that he was the only person who had ever made me feel truly sexy. Perhaps it was because he had also been the person to bring out my sexuality, to show me that sexual matters could be fun and beautiful and full of love.

Stepping up to me, my big brother gently ran a hand over a breast. "No bra today?"

"No way," I said. "I'm not going to the library today, I don't need to be 'presentable' to anyone, and with the high heat and the hellacious humidity, I'd rather not have something confining my chest since I can get away with not wearing a bra."

"Good point." He gave my breast a gentle squeeze, then finished getting ready for work. I felt a little guilty at having the day off while my big brother still had to go to work, but it could not be helped.

We had breakfast together at the nearby Starbucks, and soon Eric left me. I sat there a while to try to finish a Tanya Huff book when I thought I had heard someone call my name.

I looked up to see one of my classmates from the spring semester waving to me from the line at the register.

Allison and I had not talked much in our Sociology of Women class. A few times, she and I had been in the same discussion group, but other than that, I usually sat by the door while she typically sat by the window. Once she had her iced vanilla latte, she sat with me and we chatted a bit.

"What brings you out this way?" she finally asked.

"I live a few blocks away, actually," I replied.

"Wow. On your own?"

"No, with my big brother. It was perfect timing, really. He was about to be transferred here to his company's office not too far from campus, and he knew that I wanted to move out of the dorms and get an apartment. There's only so much a student can afford, so he suggested we get a place together."

"Wow... That's sweet of him!"

"Yeah." I took another sip of my mocha. "We've always been close, so when he offered, I eagerly accepted. But what about you?"

"Well, my boyfriend lives out this way, also nearby. So while he's at work today, I figured I'd come in and get one of my favorite drinks, then go shopping for his birthday present. Or rather, go shopping so thatIcan be his birthday present!"

Allison and I shared a knowing grin. Lowering my voice so that I would not unduly shock the pair of older women at a nearby table, I suggested, "Perhaps you should try a crotchless panty, to give him the experience of taking you even while his present is still 'fully wrapped.'"

I could almost hear the gears turning in Allison's mind. "Well, I did see online a blue skirt-and-shirt outfit which resembled party-themed wrapping paper..."

I smiled, seeing the opportunity for her. "That's perfect! Add some knee-high socks and some appropriate shoes, perhaps a thin necklace and a few bracelets, and put your hair in a ponytail, and it would be a good look for you."

I could picture the scene in my mind: Allison on all fours, the back of the skirt resting on her lower back, her boyfriend pulling on her ponytail as he took his pleasure from her body...

"Yeah," Allison agreed. "He certainly does like the 'youngster' look, especially given his age."

"Huh? 'Given his age?'" I prompted.

"Um..." She hesitated, almost as if embarrassed to explain – which I could understand, since Allison and I did not really know each other very well at all. "Gene's about to turn forty."

"I see..." I remembered Allison mentioning once that she would be in Miami to celebrate her nineteenth birthday during Spring Break. For her to be dating someone more than twice her age seemed almost creepy in a way.

...yet who was I to make such a judgment? After all, my boyfriend was my big brother.

"In a way," she added, "I wish I had much smaller breasts, like you. It would really help me to look younger for him."

It was a struggle to prevent my jaw from dropping.

*****

As we lay naked in his bed that night, Eric held me close, spooning with me from behind. Allison's admissions still filled my mind. "Do you think I look young?" I finally asked.

"Why? Do you think I look particularly old?"

"No, but..." How could I explain Allison's contention? Yet, somehow, I did.

...and, somehow, Eric understood. "There is certainly an appeal about young-looking women, which I've noticed more and more as I've gotten older," he admitted. "But on the other hand, isn't American society essentially brainwashed by the media to place a greater importance on young-looking women?"

"Sure, so long as the 'young-looking women' have big chests."

He moved a hand to my chest, gently squeezing each breast in turn. "Here's an important question for you, and you don't need to answer this to me, but think about this for yourself: Are you comfortable with your own body? Do you feel good the way you are? Do you feel that youneedto have larger breasts to please anyone but yourself?"

His questions resonated in my mind, and reminded my heart of why I loved him so much, of why Eric had been so special to me throughout my life. His age had given him plenty of wisdom in many areas of life, and he had long been able to enlighten me from this extra six years of thoughts and experiences.

Thinking about the fact that he helped me to feel truly sexy, I held my big brother's hand to a breast. "I'm fine with how I am now," I said quietly, and that was mostly true. "I do wish these were a little larger, but I suppose every woman wants to change something about the way she looks."

As I was held in the darkness by my boyfriend, my mind was at peace, and my heart absorbed the love emanating from the older man behind me.