Home 05: Feels Like Home

"It's all right, princess," Rae assured. "Will's ready for school. I'll take him while you get ready. What time do you work today?"

Tara relaxed a little, taking the squirming baby from Rae's arms. She shrugged the arm of the negligee to expose her breast and immediately Rachel latched onto the swollen nipple. "I have to be there at 8:30, but I can call in sick."

"That's all right. I have some errands I need to take care of today, anyway, but is it all right if we get my mom to keep the kids this evening so we can be alone?"

"Your mother will love that," Tara replied, her voice dropping to an intimate register, "and so will I."

Rae leaned down for another kiss, the touch carrying the love and tenderness she felt for her girlfriend. "I'll take Will to school and see you this afternoon, then. I love you." She disappeared from Tara's vision, shooing Will into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He obeyed immediately.

Tara leaned back, enjoying the time to allow Rachel to nurse while Rae took care of the normal morning stress. The thought that it could always be that way touched her mind, but fear chased it away. "Honey," she said with caution in her voice. Rae mumbled in response. "I thought you were in the middle of a tour. What are you doing here?"

Rae did not answer immediately. Tara listened as dishes rattled. Finally, Rae replied, "We'll talk about it this evening, baby."

The answer did not satisfy Tara, but she knew she had to accept it for now. It haunted her the rest of the day. Rae's words nagged at her brain during every lull of the day. It gnawed at her heart and threatened to turn her stomach. Time took turns crawling about as she anticipated an evening alone with her lover and speeding by as she dreaded what Rae had to say.

Her mother had been waiting when she dropped off Rachel that morning and had seemed relieved to see her. They didn't talk about anything but the baby's needs for the day. When Tara got off work, Rae was standing in the employee parking lot, leaning against her car. Tara almost broke into a run for her lover's arms. Instead, she added a little skip to her step in order to get there quicker. Rae opened her arms and Tara stepped into the warm embrace. Their kiss spoke volumes about where their thoughts had lingered during the day and their anticipation of what the night would hold. Tara was breathless when she stepped away. "Hi," she whispered.

"Did you have a good day?" Rae asked, her arms looped loosely around Tara's waist.

Tara leaned against her lover, stretching up to receive another kiss. "It was long, thinking of you being so close to me. You've never been in town when I've had to be at work all day. Did you get your errands done?"

"I did. Your breasts are huge."

"Rachel is hungry." Instead of getting in the car so they could go retrieve their children, though, they enjoyed another long, intimate kiss, their mouths' hungry against each other's lips and their tongues dueling frantically. They didn't break the kiss until they heard someone clear their throat. Tara broke away and smiled bashfully at the man standing nearby with a frown on his face. "Hi, Jack. Honey, this is my manager. Jack, this is my . . ." Tara lifted her eyes to Rae's expectant face, "This is the woman I love, Raegan Hall."

"I've heard a lot about you," Jack said stiffly.

"You've taken good care of my family," Rae replied. "I'm grateful."

"I'll see you tomorrow," he mumbled to Tara, moving to his car.

Rae looked into Tara's face. "He's handsome."

Tara stretched up for a final kiss. "Let's go get our babies." Rae opened the car door for Tara and they headed across town to pick up Will from school. Tara expertly wove the car through the suburban streets to her parents' house. Will immediately scrambled out of the car, but Rae stayed still in the front seat, staring at the small house. "Come in with me," Tara whispered.

"Baby, do you really think that is a good idea?"

"Will has already announced that you are here. I want my parents to get used to the idea of you in my life." She leaned across the console so they could kiss gently. "We'll be strong for each other, babe." She smiled softly, touching Rae's cheek. "I love you being here with me."

Tara turned to get out of the car, so she again missed Rae's expression. Reluctantly, Rae also emerged from the vehicle. She adjusted her sunglasses on her face and slowly walked around the small automobile. She inhaled deeply and took Tara's hand. Together they walked to the house.

Grant Roding immediately rose from his chair and walked out of the living room when he saw his daughter with her girlfriend. Tara's shoulders dipped a little at her father's refusal to attempt to accept Rae, but then she took a deep breath and stood up straight to face her mother. They found Jane Roding in the nursery. Will was on his knees in the floor making faces at his baby sister while Jane tucked the baby's belongings into the diaper bag. "We had such a good day today," Jane said without looking at them. "She ate well and took a good nap and. . ." As she turned and caught sight of Rae, her voice stopped and her face fell. "Hello, Raegan."

"Mrs. Roding, it's good to see you again." Rae extended her hand. Jane stared at it for a moment, and then reluctantly shook it, plastering a smile across her face. "My friends call me Rae. You should, too."

"Rae," Jane repeated. She pulled her hand away quickly and resumed packing Rachel's bag. "Clay Ashe called today. He asked for your number. He may call tonight."

"My phone will be off the hook tonight," Tara replied. She bent to pick up Rachel, cooing softly to her daughter. "I'm glad you were a good girl for Grandma, today. Are you ready to spend the night with Nanna and Poppa Max?"

"We're spending the night with Nanna and Poppa Max?" Will repeated. He jumped up and down excitedly. "Yippee! Poppa Max always makes me popcorn and lets me stay up late."

"Go on out to the car, buddy, so we can go get your things. I know Nanna and Poppa Max are just as excited to see you." He skipped out of the room and Tara turned on her mother. "You promised to try."

"Why are they spending the night at the Hall's?" Jane asked, ignoring her daughter's accusations.

"Because I'm going to take my girlfriend home and do things to her that are still illegal in some states," Tara spat back. "And I'd prefer to be alone to do it tonight, because when she rocks my world, I want to scream to God my thankfulness for putting her in my life."

Tara spun on her heel and walked out of the house, leaving her shocked mother and stunned girlfriend in her wake. Rae looked apologetically at Jane, then shrugged her shoulders helplessly and followed Tara to the car. Tara was buckling Rachel into her car seat. She jumped when she turned and saw Rae standing beside her. Tara wiped at the tears glistening in her eyes. Rae grinned, placing her hands on Tara's hips. She pressed a firm kiss to Tara's lips. "That was hot as hell, baby."

Tara laughed, relaxing against Rae. She turned her face up. "You think so?"

"Yeah, I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to wait until tonight to make love to you, I want you so badly right now."

Tara lifted her arms to Rae's shoulders, stepping closer to her girlfriend as she parted her lips expectantly. "I love you," she whispered before their lips touched in a deep, intimate kiss sparked by Tara's passionate pledge and anticipation of the fulfillment later. "Waiting will just make it all the sweeter," she promised before slipping out of Rae's arms.

Rae groaned in mock frustration as she walked around the car and slid into the passenger's seat. Will started talking about what he would do with Poppa Max as soon as Tara started the car, distracting them from their desire for one another. They linked their fingers across the console and allowed Will to entertain them, but even that faint touch felt electrified.

The evening was filled with teasing touches and longing glances. They took the children to Rae's parents' house and went to a private club for dinner. In the dim light of the restaurant, every accidental brush of their thighs and occasional touch of their hands reminded them of their desire for one another. On the drive back to Tara's apartment, she leaned across the console, her body hugging Rae's arm as her partner expertly steered through the streets of the small town. Tara's lips nibbled along Rae's jaw line and neck and her hand slid up and down Rae's thigh. Every time Rae came to a stop, she turned to meet Tara's lips. They ran up the steps of the apartment building, giggling as Rae fumbled with the lock. As soon as the door was closed behind them, they launched themselves into one another's arms.

Rae leaned against the door as Tara pushed hungrily against her. Their lips were locked desperately, their tongues wrapped in a frantic duel of tasting and taunting. Tara nipped and bit and sucked at Rae's lips, pulling her body far enough away to unbutton Rae's shirt. Rae responded by working on the fastener to Tara's skirt. Tara casually batted Rae's hand away and resumed opening her lover's shirt. Rae slid her hands over Tara's back as their kiss continued, her fingers freeing Tara's shirt from the waistband.

Tara shrugged from Rae's embrace and broke the kiss long enough for a teasing smile. She pushed Rae's blouse off her shoulders and took both of the woman's wrists in her hands, pinning them together above Rae's head. Keeping Rae's hands prisoner, Tara moved her mouth down Rae's neck, trailing her lip along her lover's collar bone. She made a trail over the cup of Rae's bra, burying her face in the shallow valley. Rae leaned her head against the door and slouched, a willing prisoner to Tara's voracious assault.

Tara used her mouth to push the cups of Rae's bra aside. Her lips latched onto one small breast. She suckled and massaged the pliable flesh with her lips, her tongue dancing around and over the pebbly nipple. Rae was breathing harder, moaning softly as Tara switched from one globe to another. Tara released Rae's hands, her fingers working to free the belt loop of her lover's slacks. Rae pressed her palms against the door, using the leverage to stay on her feet as Tara's hungry mouth devoured more of her breast.

"Oh, baby, whatever has gotten into you, don't stop," Rae whispered as Tara's mouth made its way down her flat stomach. Her tongue danced around Rae's navel as her hands pushed Rae's pants down. Rae kicked them away and inhaled sharply when Tara knelt in front of her and planted a kiss on her sensitive mound. Rae trembled and bit her lip as Tara's tongue darted inside. Tara immediately found Rae's swollen clit. Her tongue flicked it, danced around it, rubbed it, and massaged it, until Rae felt like a helpless puddle. Her body trembled and throbbed with each delicious movement of her lover's mouth. She struggled to remain upright, all her strength focused on the task as Tara taunted and teased her body.

Rae's hips bucked forward, riding the wave that Tara created. Tara slipped her tongue into Rae's slick canal, thrusting in and out as Rae rocked forward and back. She tossed her head from side-to-side, her body a tingling mass of desire and lust that finally exploded with a cry of release that echoed off the walls of the apartment.

Rae's strength left her and she slid weakly down the door. Tara sat back, wiping her chin with the back of her hand and grinning like the Cheshire cat. She leaned forward and kissed Raegan's lips, her tongue swirling deeply into her lover's mouth. Rae pulled back a little and eyed Tara. "Who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?"

She felt Tara smile against her lips but not release them. "I guess I've spent too many nights alone in my bed thinking about what I wanted to do to you," she whispered. She stood, reaching for Rae's hands and pulling her lover to her feet. Their mouth's remained fused as they crossed to the sofa. She pushed Rae's shoulder and the taller woman fell onto the cushions. She reached for Tara, attempting to pull her girlfriend into her arms, but Tara easily eluded Rae's grasp.

Tara smiled coyly and pulled her blouse free from the waistband of her skirt. She reached behind her and unhooked her bra, revealing her pale, full breasts with hard pink nipples. Rae licked her lips and sat back to enjoy the show, knowing that Tara would not stay out of reach long. Tara finished unhooking the buttons of her skirt and with a wiggle of her hips, slithered out of it. Certain she had Rae's full attention, she shimmied out of her lace panties. Rae stretched her hands toward Tara, who inched forward and sat on Rae's lap, straddling her lover's hips. They kissed again, less aggressive and more tender than before, while their hands roamed over each other's bodies. They caressed shoulders and arms and thighs. They tickled bellies. They cupped and squeezed breasts, their touches growing more forceful as their lust intensified.

Rae's mouth latched onto Tara's breast, teeth and lips scraping and biting. Tara inhaled and moaned, wrapping her arms around Rae's head. Her hips started rising and falling, creating an electric charge between their two bodies that sparked with every down thrust. Rae maneuvered her hand between their bodies and her fingertips played at Tara's opening. She pushed two fingers inside and rested her thumb against Tara's clit, allowing Tara's writhing body to do the true work. Tara rocked and thrust, pushing her body higher. Rae's fingers slid in and out of her lover, her mouth suckling and consuming. Tara answered each thrust with a little yelp, the sound growing louder and sharper as her passion built.

Tara dropped her hand, working her fingers into Rae's pussy and matching the rhythm of Rae's lovemaking. Rae growled against her breast and they both quickened their pace. Tara's fingers squeezed and pulled on Rae's clit as Rae pushed her fingers in and out of Tara's tunnel. They couldn't tell where one ended and the other began physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. Attuned to each other, Tara threw her head back and cried out. Rae's voice joined Tara's and their song of love filled the room.

As they descended, Rae shifted and lay Tara back on the couch. She hovered over her lover, smiling down at the small, delicate body. Her mouth moved slowly, her tongue licking the inside of Tara's thighs before delving into the depths of slick, sensitive lips. She flicked and rubbed with her tongue, finding all of Tara's secret spots. Tara responded immediately, opening her body for her lover as the wave quickly built and crested.

They lay together afterwards, their bodies glistening with sweat as they struggled to control their gasping breath. Their arms and legs were entwined and it was impossible to tell which limb belonged to whom. They fell asleep like that and sometime during the night, they woke long enough to pull out the bed and make tender love again, the aggression exchanged for soft whispers and warm sighs and gentle touches. After they both came, they slept peacefully again, their bodies sated and their souls content.

Tara woke alone. She stretched her aching body and sat up, looking over her shoulder to smile at Rae. Still naked, she climbed out of bed and walked across the room to where her girlfriend sat at the kitchen table. Rae smiled as Tara came to her, slipping onto her lap. Their kiss was brief. "I called Mom. The kids are fine and Pop took Will to school," she said.

Tara rubbed her thumb along Rae's bruised lips, her arm around her girlfriend's shoulders. "This is nice," she whispered, resting her forehead against her partner's. "How long do you get to stay?"

Rae kissed Tara again, patting the smaller woman's bare bottom. "Go put on a robe, baby. I get distracted when you're naked."

Tara hesitated a moment before standing, her thoughts toying with the idea of diverting Rae's attention from the conversation they needed to have. She could tell by Rae's eyes that she might not like what her lover had to say. Reluctantly, she stood, their fingers pulling apart slowly. Rae stood and fixed Tara a glass of juice while Tara pulled her silk robe over her naked body. Tara suddenly wished she had time to get dressed. She felt defenseless.

Rae was leaning against the kitchen counter, staring into a mug of coffee as she attempted to order her thoughts. Tara remained standing, her arms folded around her waist in protection. "Do you remember Sydney Raines?" Rae said at last. Tara nodded once. "Syd was my first girl, you know. She was comfortably with her sexuality even back then. She gave me the courage to face my own desires." Tara brows came together in puzzlement, but she didn't interrupt Rae's words, sensing that Rae needed time to form her sentences. "That was my errand yesterday. I went to see Syd. She's a lawyer now and specializes in family law. In fact, she specializes in gay family law, even though that's not a category. She's drafted palimony agreements and even helped a few gay couples decide who got the dog when the relationship didn't work. Where she has done the most work is in gay adoption, though. In fact, she and her girlfriend have adopted three children."

Tara shifted uncomfortably, knowing where the conversation was headed. She still did not say anything, so Rae continued. "I explained our situation to her. She said that even the most conservative judge would not take children away from their natural mother, no matter what the circumstances were, as long as the children were healthy and not being abused."

Tara wiped at tears on her cheeks and Rae crossed to her, holding Tara's elbows in her trembling hands as she continued to talk. "All we have to do is prove we are providing a stable, loving home for the children. If we do that, Billy's parents can't take Will and Rachel away from us."

Tara inhaled deeply, wiping her eyes as she attempted to speak. Rae's hands caressed softly, moving over Tara's shoulders and arms in an attempt to comfort and assure her girlfriend. "What if she is wrong?" Tara whispered.

"She's paid big bucks not to be wrong," Rae answered. "I trust Syd; I know she'll fight for us. She said we should go ahead and move you to Nashville, that way we can request a Nashville judge. It seems we run a better chance of getting a sympathetic judge in Nashville."

"You said that wouldn't matter."

"We need to stack the cards in our favor, sweetheart." Rae had released Tara and was pacing as she talked, her words coming quicker as her excitement grew. "Also, we establish a home life for the children. No matter what, a social worker will want to check out our home. They will need to do drop in visits to make certain we are providing the proper environment. A social worker from Nashville will be more likely to go in our favor, too, even though no social worker would find a problem with the type of home we can provide. Will and Rachel will everything they need physically and emotionally. I love those kids so much."

"I know you do," Tara said, but her voice was shaky and soft.

Rae didn't pay attention. "We need to do everything we can to assure Billy's parents that we aren't going to let the children forget them. I'll never be their daddy. I want your wedding pictures and pictures of Will and Billy around the house. We'll need to let him call them on a regular basis. If they see we aren't going to keep him from them, then they may even drop the suit. What do you think, sweetheart? When can you move? If you need to work out a notice, that's fine." For the first time since she had begun talking, Rae turned to focus fully on Tara. Tara was leaning against one of the kitchen chairs, her hand pressed to her lips. Tears flowed freely and she was shaking her head. Rae went to her, sliding her arms around her girlfriend, but Tara stepped away. "I can't," she whispered.